The Godessess somewhat-but-not-really-forgotten son
by prototype gear
Summary: It was just a regular day for him, watching the going-ons of the UG from the RG. And then she appeared, someone he missed, loved, and hated all at once. She offered him a job. Was it a good idea taking it? He still says it was the worse decision of his life. Elements of Undertale and Twewy abound people. Major AU.
1. Chapter 1

**I know I said that I would not be doing more than four stories at once…but this came up in my mind. And the plot bunnies would not stop running until I gave in. this is my first attempt at writing a darkish story. Kind helps that I was listening to "Your best nightmare" when writing this. This is simply the prologue. Which is why its so short.**

 **Im going to be trying to increase my chapter content to at least thirteen thousand words instead of a measly five-eight thousand. Which is why I haven't updated anything else in quite a while.**

 **I do so hope you enjoy this. This is a different take on the whole parents thing in Naruto, so please review and tell me your thoughts.**

Prologue: Why!?

* * *

 **-Ost: Undertale: The fallen child-**

Why?

Why?

Why…

WHY!?

"Mother…how could you…?"

Broken, his world shattered before his very eyes by the person he trusted the most. A cruel reality layed before him on the date of his birth.

A day of happiness, of joy. Turned into a bloodbath by the figure that stood in the middle of it all. A cruel smile on her lips as she examined the blond boy crying on his knees. His tears having no visible effect on the woman.

His friends shocked faces, dismembered limbs, and chunks of flesh were scattered around, blood everywhere as his tears intermingled with the pool he lay kneeled in. In the midst of all the carnage, of all the horror, was an untouched birthday cake, six candles perfectly lit as not a touch of crimson was spotted upon the frosting. Unlike the rest that was soaking the table cloths.

The Woman was like beauty given physical form. Crimson red hair flowed like ethereal strands of silk down her back and ended just short of her ankles. Amethyst eyes of the purest shade gleamed in the light of the terror around her. Perfectly flawless skin just a touch pale glistened in the candlelight. The only imperfection to the picture of beauty was the blood stained kimono, and the euphoric smile that marred the woman's face.

"Why…?"

Why indeed? It was like a mantra, a repeated phrase as the boy still tried to comprehend the scene before him. Why were all his friends mutilated in such gruesome ways? Why was his mother standing there, her clothing bloodstained as she simply smiled at him like she had been for the past twenty minutes? And why? Why? WHY!?

Why was she standing on the torso of his father!? Why could he see his beloved father's legs just behind the table!? Why were his eyes missing from their sockets!? Why was she looking at him, her son, with all the love she could convey as she stood in a puddle of her husband's blood!

"Why…? Why would you do this…?"

She laughed. It was the laugh he had always heard from her when he always tried to prank her, or steal from the cookie jar, or anything she found amusing. It was the laugh that he had associated with the kindest person in the world, the one person he could always trust, the person that he always went to when he was being bullied, and the person that would sing him to sleep when he cried in her arms.

So why? What did she find so funny in all of the unholyness around her!?

Chains. Golden chains erupted from the ground and wrapped around his kneeling form. He put up no resistance when they tightened around him and kept him in that same kneeling position. She fixed him a look full of love and caring as he calmly took a step forward, and began to walk from one puddle of blood to the another puddle. The only difference being that she was, at the same time, stepping into a puddle of children's tears.

The woman knelt in front of her crying child, her son, and gave the boy a smile…before she thrusted her hand through the boys stomach. The boy cried out in pain as his mother grabbed something inside of him, and twisted her hand. A howl of agony escaped the boy's lips as his mother pulled back her hand, a golden orb of power was pulsating in her grasp.

The golden chains slackened, and released the boy so that he may collapse and lay in the puddle of blood and tears around him. A gaping hole was in the place of his stomach as blood flowed out of it like a river, joining the rest of the sanguine liquid that was scattered everywhere on the stone floor.

The boys haunted and pain filled eyes still leaked tears as his mother held the glowing orb in her blood covered hand. A loving smile was still in place as her jewel-like eyes gazed into her child's sapphire-like ones. She walked over and knelt right next to her dying child, who gasped up a glob of blood that escaped his lips.

"I always wanted a daughter…and then you were born. Can't say it wasn't worth it…you were always so adorable. I think I actually started to love you a little bit starting…about six months ago."

Her words were cruel as she moved her sons head onto her lap. Not caring for any of the blood staining the area around her as she ignored her child's last breaths.

"It truly is a shame that Minato was fool enough to seal a demon into your gut. 'Protecting his village' I believe he called it. 'We'll protect him from the villagers' he told me. It really doesn't matter in the end, I mean; what kind of father seals a demon into a child's body…much less his own infant that was just born? I did tell him that I would pluck his eyes out for that…and an Uzumaki always keeps their word."

Her son's body was now starting to feel cold. Her eyes narrowed in anger at that simple fact, and then softened when she realized that the boy she was cradling was just that. A child. So she sent a pulse of her power into her weakling of a son to keep him alive just a tad bit longer. The mother smiled as she stroked the boy's bloodstained hair. The crimson liquid had now turned black due to exposure.

"If your fool of a father hadn't made his most idiotic decision that faithful day…and let me seal the demon into myself, you would've lived. And we would be spending happy days in a royal palace as I ascended to godhood like I am doing right now…and you would have many more sisters instead of the twins you will never get to see."

A choked sound came from the boy's throat as he tried to speak. Kushina smiled as she sent another pulse of her power into her dying child. She leaned forward and bent her back just a smidgeon and sent a simple breath into her child's ear.

"Tell me your last words Naruto…so that I may look back fondly at all the memories of my first child." She whispered into the boy's ear and then tilted her head so that her ear was next to the boy's mouth. She listened intently as her child managed to bring out the last words she would hear from the child.

"I…I love you mom." The boy croaked out, before he went limp in her arms. A frown marred the woman's bloody face as she processed that she just heard. A sigh escaped her lips as she stood up, the body of her child sliding off her legs. She walked three steps away from the still breathing, but pitiful child behind her.

She didn't turn around to look at the boy as a dark power seeped out of the redheaded woman's body and gathered near her hand. A hard look was directed the woman's hand as she glared at the open door before her.

"You always were a momma's boy…but I guess that's part of what makes you so adorable." She hissed into the air as she whipped herself around, and slung the concentrated glob of dark power towards her almost-dead child that layed on the bloody floor.

The insidious power screeched through the air and collided with the downed boy, enveloping everything in the room with a blinding tainted light. When it stopped gleaming, it revealed a stone statue in place of the boy, carved into his likeliness.

A smile graced the mother as she exited the building, a third eye found itself being formed in the middle of her forehead as she walked through the halls of her quiet home, leaving behind the dead bodies of her deceased husband, and the friends of her first child.

"If you can survive and escape the Voidlands…then you can call yourself my child. And I will shower you with my love…that is if your future siblings don't kill you first." She chuckled as the third eye opened, revealing a red eye with multiple rings and nine tomoe.

In the next second, an entire village blinked out of existence. And then a continent was vaporized in the next. And then the entire world was rewritten.

 **-OST:END-**

* * *

A sigh escaped the mouth of a redheaded seventeen-year old with a set of headphones blasting music into his ears. He calmly walked the waterways, avoiding people without even opening his eyes as his feet walked the well-travelled cobblestone road.

He wore a simple dark blue coat; it appeared to be a simple pallet swap of the coats in the matrix, a pair of sunglasses that blocked the world from seeing his eyes. His leather boots sloshed through a puddle of cold water as he flexed his fingerless-gloved hands. With the gloves themselves having a symbol of a circle surrounded by a ring of flames, a sun symbol.

It was night. The stars were out on this chilly winter afternoon as the seventeen-year old's breath became visible when it came into contact with the night air. The city lights lit up the walkways and showed the world the black color of the riverway. It appeared as if the water was just simply liquid darkness as it continued underneath a tunnel beneath a bridge.

The young adult pulled a pin out of his pocket. It was a strange pin, black with white skull-like design. The almost-man tossed it into the air, pulling in a deep breath as the pin flipped in the air…

"Open up…your senses."

…and landed back into his open palm. And then his mind's eye opened, and he could hear everything. The man stood there for naught but a few seconds, before he suddenly took off into another direction, heading into a seedy alleyway that needed to be cleaned up.

He walked through the alleyway and took a left at the fork in the road, and came upon a sight of a group of three men accosting a single woman. Already knowing what they would say if he interrupted them and asked what they were doing, the man simply walked behind one of the men, and clobbered him in the back of the head.

The indignant cry of pain drew the attention of all that were present. One of the three men sneered at the intruder as he conjured up a fireball to float above his open hand.

"Do you wanna get hurt kid?" he demanded angrily as he glared right at the seventeen-year old who hit his buddy in the back of the head. The same fella who still had yet to get back up.

The boy was quiet for three seconds before he spoke up. "The better question would be…"

He opened his eyes. And then his left eye glowed a ghostly blue and a wispy trail of that same color floated up from his eye.

"Do you wanna have a bad time?"

* * *

 **Cue Megalovania.**

 **In case you couldn't tell, I have played undertale recently. As well as Pokemon super mystery dungeon. Which is partly why I haven't done anything with I don't think mom wanted me to be a ninja. I wanted to see what plot and character stuff super introduced into the lore of mystery dungeon, and see what I wanted and could add onto my first story.**

 **But anyways, Undertale is an amazing game with a story that just sucks you right in, and does so with its lovable cast of characters (sans and papyrus), its music, and gameplay. It's a very unique game that is more than worth the ten bucks it costs on steam. Toby Fox has done some amazing work, and I look forward to what he does in the future.**

 **I got this idea from another fairy tail/Naruto fanfic called 'devil of edolas, soul of the one magic' or something to those lines. In it, Naruto's a god. Kushina's a god. Menma's a little shit but he's a god. And his sisters are gods as well. Only problem is…Naruto has some really bad history with his mum. And well…its pretty interesting. Its makes a godlike Naruto actually have some decent enemies, them being gods themselves. go check it out if you want.**

 **And yes, that was a player pin.**

 **AND THATS ALL SHE WROTE!**

 **CUE THE AIRHORNS!**

 **BABABABWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!**


	2. Watcher in the Coffee Shop!

**Welcome to the second chapter of me story. Last chapter was pretty much Grim dark as fuck and messed up right? Well this chapter's kinda tame in comparison. But we get to see Naruto's magic in action, as well as a bit of the aftermath of the whole Kushina becoming a god thing.**

 **Later we will go into just how she got like that and the events leading up to it, as well as what she did after she ascended to godhood.**

 **I don't own fairy tail, Naruto, Twewy, or Undertale.**

* * *

Chapter one: Watcher in the Coffee Shop!

 **-OST:** **Twister (Kingdom Remix) [feat. Stephanie, MJR]-**

Cliffs as high as the eye can see, with trees growing out of the rock and tilting upwards to better capture sunlight. That all he saw when he looked left and right. Eyes returning to the dirt road before him, he idly noted that there was a cave in front of him a good distance away.

The man was of the height that belonged to the average seventeen-year old. He wore an open long coat that was black and had red flame patterns at the bottom. His blue pants were held up by a black leather belt that had a sun-symbol belt buckle. A red shirt with a red heart emblem was the only other thing that he wore on his torso. His long, spiky blond hair was tied into a ponytail that trailed down his back and ended just below the middle of his spine. Resting on his neck was a set of headphones that were blasting a song called 'Give me all your love.'

The man pulled his silver-fingerless gloved hand, and cracked his knuckles. Craning his neck as well as he looked at the large opening of the cave in the distance. "Well…looks like that flower was right about this place. A monster nest…or at the very least the home of that big ass motherfucker that's been rampaging around."

As if to answer the man's statement, a large, giant of a monster walked out of the cave and gave the air a good sniff. The monster itself was large, bipedal with two horns sprouting from its head, and a nuzzle for a mouth.

Black hair covered every bit of the towering hunk of power, with powerful muscles and four finger clawed hands; it stretched out and gave a great big yawn.

"Oh look, it just woke up from nap time. Will daddy have to smack a bitch back to sleep he wonders?" came the sarcastic voice of the man, whose sapphire blue eyes glared at the beast in question.

The monster then farted, and scratched its butt.

"Oh great, it's retarded too. Gee, what else is new concerning my job? Idiots day in and day out…" the man muttered. Although it would seem that the beasts hyper-sensitive ears that looked like a donkeys picked up the sound of the jerkass's voice.

It turned to look at the man in the distance, and its eyes turned red. Not crimson demon slitted red, but its entire eye turned red and glowed that same color with rage.

"Ah fuck. Me and my big mouth…" the man cursed as he settled into a fighting position. His fists in front of his face as he tensed his legs and bent them slightly. The beast then bared its chest, slammed its meaty fists against, and roared.

And when it roars, everything in the vicinity knows that is should get the fuck out and dodge. Trees were uprooted, bushes shredded into the wind, rocks were thrown back, and the ground underneath the monster cracked from the sheer force of the might yell.

The man grit his teeth and held up his arm in front of his face as he was blown back slowly by the powerful winds generated from the monster's roar. When the mighty yell ceased, the monster was on all fours. Steam was blowing out of the giant beast's nostrils. The monster then opened up its terrifying maw, and a light began to radiate from the back of its throat.

"Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me…" the man muttered as he crossed his arms in front of his body, calling upon his magic in preparation.

With a resounding boom, a powerful white lazer speeded out of the monsters mouth and zoomed onwards towards the man's location. When the powerful expulsion of magic came into contact with the man, it split itself upon him, and blasted off into different directions, created non-descript carvings into the surrounding Cliffside.

* * *

Standing on one of those selfsame surrounding cliffs was a busty redheaded woman in a chainmail bikini armor. The only other pieces of armor she possessed were large sabatons with armoring that came up to her knee (think the light suit in Metroid prime echoes) and gauntlets that crawled up to her elbows. The woman's hair was of medium length, and spiked in multiple directions.

The woman eyed the blast of light as it approached the man, with the man doing something to protect himself from that very same blast of pure energy.

 _A man…let us see just what this man's fate is. Will he die to this beast, as nothing but a blot of blood upon the pure earth? Or will he prevail against this beast that gave me, a war goddess, a simple nick upon my undamaged skin?_

With eyes that looked exactly like that of an eagle, the women stared at the battle down below her.

* * *

When the monstrous beat stopped its unrelenting wave of energy, it stood back on its legs. A grin on its face as it viewed the gouged out earth that stood in the path of its assault. It was about to begin hunting game in the area, when the smoke cleared, and revealed a sight that would make the beast charge like a bull.

Floating just slightly above the ground, with his arms crossed in front of his face, the man had not a scratch upon his figure as he was protected by a flaming aura of protection. When the man released his technique, the **_Crackle Pop Barrier_** , his feet met the ground and his gaze settle onto the rushing beast.

The man simply put one hand in his feet, shifted his body so that his right side was facing the charging bull, which still had a lot of distance to cover, and raised a hand that glowed white towards the rushing beast.

" ** _Superfine Beam!_** " the man shouted, and like magic, a continuous stream of grey bursts of energy rushed from his hand outwards towards the speeding monster. Although it really didn't seem to do anything as the arrows of energy just impacted with the beast's strong hide, and faded away from existence after that.

The man's hand that was in his pocket retreated from the warm confines of the pocket, and he did a swiping motion with his index finger, all the while keeping up the **_Superfine Beam_** 's onslaught.

Suddenly, barbed wire erupted from nowhere and put itself in front of the path of the charging monster. However, the monster just barreled on through the **_Love Me Tether_**. The monster had now reached the halfway marker, and had already barreled through six more of the **_Love Me Tether's_** that the man had created by doing six more swipes with his index finger.

The man's efforts were only making the bull expel more effort into charging towards him. A smirk graced his features as he realized that he was essentially annoying the bull-like monster. Focusing his eyes onto the charging monster, the man cast yet another spell as he continued to make swiping motions with his index finger, as well as keeping up the stream of shots from the **_Superfine Beam_**.

A stream of light seemed to shine down from the heavens and become spotlight for the monster. This in reality was just another spell that the man had begun to use. The **_Eyes Full of Hope_** was but a simple spell that slowly shaved off the vitality of those that fell under its gaze.

The three spells were more than enough to slow down the great hulking beast, but no enough to stop it. Onwards and onwards, the beast kept up its charge, like a berserker that only knew how do destroy what was in front of it, it kept going. It went on and on, until it was in front of the mage, who had stopped his onslaught now that the beast was in front of him.

With a great roar, the beast stood on its hind legs, interlocked its meaty hands, and slammed them down to the smirking mage before it.

To put it simply, the beast was the size of a four story house, and its mighty arms reached down to its hooved knees. The man simply put the hand he used to cast the **_Love Me Tethers_** back into his pocket, and gathered magic around his hand that had kept up the stream of **_Superfine beams_**.

A lance like construct of energy materialized around the man's hand, and he suddenly speeded forward, in between the monsters legs and cutting past the beast's ankles, with a cry of **_"Go 2 Hell!_** "

It was a simple spell that propelled someone forward at high speeds. And it was fast enough to avoid the hulking monster's meaty sledgehammer of an attack, which created a crater from the sheer force behind the attack.

The man was behind the monster with a smirk on his face as he noticed that the spot he sped past had actually bled. He had managed to cut through the monsters incredibly tough hide, and that pleased the man if only for the simple fact that he managed to make his opponent bleed first blood.

"Ha! First round goes to me ya giant ha-"

*Thwack*

It was so sudden; he could barely track the movement of the monster's arm. It was just so _fast_. And by the time he had realized that it had made a move against him, it was already too late to move out of the way.

The beast had turned around with great haste, and slammed its arm in an ascending motion, and sent the man flying into the air. It was fast, and it was hard. Too late the man realized. He wasn't fighting a mighty glacier, but a lightning bruiser.

The man was high above in the air. He realized his situation in one second, and with great pain racking his body, he turned his gaze towards the monster on the ground. The next second, it was just _there_.

Right in front of him.

In the air.

With both of its hands intertwined together, as if using them like a sledgehammer.

The next thing the man knew was the pain that came from the pure brute strength of the monster as is slammed its hands onto the prone form of the mage, sending him towards the ground at terminal velocity.

When the dust settled, there was a large crater in place of a spot were a boulder taller than the monster used to be. At the very epicenter of the crater was a severely damaged mage with blood leaking from his mouth.

The blurry images ceased to be, and he saw a sight that absolutely terrified him. Descending towards him was his monster opponent, a fist cocked back. The beast was using the gravity of his fall to strengthen his own punch.

And it was falling.

Towards him.

And it was getting closer…

And closer…

Until finally, the fist of the monster met ground zero, and the brute force of the blow itself was so great, it generated an explosion that was two times the size of the crater itself.

The result was a crater the size of 1/6 of the valley.

And there was no blond mage in sight.

However, while the beast had brute strength in spades, it was also a hunter. It was a smart one too. And a hunter used more than instinct and strength to survive. It wanted to be sure that it had completely destroyed the mage that it was battling.

And so, the best began to sniff the air. And it was confirmed that the man was indeed, still alive. The beast turned itself around, and glared at the man. Who was simply leaning against a tree, drinking from a can of soda.

"Man, gotta love **_Top Gear_** and **_Konohana Sakuya_**. In case you're wondering, the former lets me teleport, and the other lets me heal myself." The man explained with a smirk. A growl from the monster was the only confirmation that the beast had heard him despite the distance.

The man threw the drink away, and it vanished into golden particles. The mage locked eyes with the beast as he continued to walk forward.

"You know, you're pretty damn strong. A lot stronger than I gave you credit for. So, I'm going to call you Rojang, because a tough ass motherfucker like yourself deserves a name that sounds badass. The names Naruto Uzumaki. And I'm going to give you the fight of your life!"

A roar from the beast was all the confirmation that Naruto needed that his challenge was accepted.

And with a roar, Rojang and Naruto charged at each other, one with pure brute strength, the other with a spell made for bashing into others, the _**Velocity Attack**_.

 **-OST: END-**

* * *

In Fiore's capital of Crocus, a veritable center of culture and entertainment, a city of magic and wonder that has stood against the test of time again and again, there exists one particular shop. A shop of wonder, a shop whose patrons always leave with knowledge upon their shoulders. A shop were they know they will always be welcomed, be accepted. It was a haven for the lost and confused, a place to set them on the right path.

It was a coffee shop. And it had some damn good coffee.

The shop's owner was a rather interesting man. He was a red-haired man with hair that spiked upwards at the beginning, with said spikes going in different directions, but after it went past his neck they became smooth, much like strands of silk, and ended just above his tailbone. He wore a simple dark blue trench coat (much like those seen in the matrix movie), shades that protected his eyes from the sunlight of the world, black leather boots, a black vest on top of black dress shirt, black leather pants, and a ring designed like a snake eating its own tail on the index finger of his right hand. And to finish off the picture, he had a set of headphones around his neck.

This was Mister Uzu, a man that was well-liked by everyone in the capital. For his likeable personality and of how he helps any person he can, especially those with problems against other people. Simply talking to him made some people's problems vanish like that. The infamous case of the quarrelling couple is still remembered to this day.

Outside of the simple coffee shop was an outside patio on the cobblestone streets. It was simply a few square tables and comfy chairs outside the door really. The inside was simply a counter near the front door, in a circular area with a marble flooring, with the menu behind the counter attached to the ceiling. To the side of the counter was a display of different bakery goods, such as a cake, or a strudel.

To the left of the counter was a large area with cushion chairs and couches, coffee tables, and regular tables. That area did not have a marble flooring, but was covered with a rug. At the moment however, the coffee shop was empty. Save for Mister Uzu himself leaning against the counter with the newspaper in hand, the window to his right a good few feet away shining light down onto a plain flower.

 _Tragedy! The Death of Titania Erza!_

Was the headline of the newspaper. Mister Uzu gave a sigh as he folded the paper and threw it into the trash bin behind the counter. He turned around and began to make himself his own cup of joe. He was the shop owner, he could do stuff like that. "Won't exactly be a death if she manages to win the current ongoing game…but who woulda thunk'd it that her partner would be the guy partly responsible for this 'Tragedy'?" he mused as he took a sip.

He blanched at the taste. "Needs more sugar." He said with a scowl on his face. He grabbed the cup and took two steps towards a different machine, held the cup beneath the dispenser, and pulled the lever. When that was down he let up on the pressure and took a sip of his caffeine drink.

A smile graced his lips as he heard a tinkling that signified that a customer had just opened the door and walked in. he was used to the players vising his little place, well the ones who were still alive that is. Looking over his shoulder just a smidgeon, he saw the tell-tale signs of scarlet hair. It would seem Erza and her partner had decided to visit her humble place in between missions again.

"Scarlet, if it's about the donuts I'm not adding anymore sugar or sweetener to the coffee I give you. That said, I thought that you were in a rush to hunt down some target blue noise?" he chuckled as he turned around to face his customer, and a smile raced his lips when he saw the butterfly hairpin just above her ear.

Aiko was an interesting girl he mused; she was a schoolgirl who was very much into fashion. She weaved her own clothing and sold her designs, allowing her to rack in the big bucks. Although she always put her more interesting and artistic designs through him. The long red hair that was in a braid and travelled to just her tailbone, much like his own hair. She constantly pestered him for a job at his coffee shop through…unorthodox means. But he would have to turn away; he already had six other employees that pretty much lived with him on the second floor.

"…I'm not turning this into a maid café. 36 is a coffee shop for people to relax and hang out. Not a place that caters to a specific fetish." He deadpanned with a smirk as he took another sip of the bittersweet drink.

And now she had such an adorable little pout on her face, ' _did the French maid outfit help her out in that regard?_ ' he wondered. He knew she was a girl that was used to having her way. Why else would she constantly pester him for a job other than the sheer principle of getting what she wanted? He knew she wasn't in it for the job. She didn't seem to be the kind of girl that was interested in the whole coffee shop girl thing.

She simply turned away and cupped her face with both of her hands, making herself be all cute-like. "Oh…he keeps turning me away. Why is this so? Could it be…that he doesn't like adorable, innocent, helpless girls like me?"

A smirk graced Mister Uzu's face as he put a hand beneath the counter, grasped a black pin with a skull-like design on it, and slapped Aiko's ass while she was turned away. She jumped into the air with an 'eeep!' and glared at Mister Uzu with anger, scorn, and embarrassment.

 _If you weren't such a handsome man, and that mother is curious about you, then I would have burned you to ashes and wiped those same ashes from all of existence with my_ _ **God Magic**_ _!_

Mister Uzu almost raised a questioning eyebrow at her. He had experience with using the player pin to read people's minds. He always found Aiko to be a mystery. A young girl with the most powerful mental fortitude he had ever seen trying to seduce her way into his coffee shop? Who wouldn't be curious? And now he had some insight into how the girl's minds worked. But what the hell is god magic? He knew of **Godslayer** magic, but god?

Curiosity ruled him for but a sentence worth, "So what do you think of Gods Aiko?" he said while turning around leaning against the counter, his back towards the schoolgirl behind him as he took a sip of his coffee, idly noting that he would have to refill it soon.

The girl rubbed her bum for but a few seconds, that same angry look still on her face. When she registered the question he had asked. Her face turned into that of a leer, a predatory leer to be exact. "Does the handsome and respected coffee shop owner want to worship me like the goddess I am? Oh how adorable! Maybe I will spare you and keep you as a servant when you fall to my charms!"

Mister Uzu blinked for one second. "…you're a leginement Goddess aren't you?" he deadpanned with a sip of his coffee.

He heard a sound akin to someone falling to the ground in shock. Or something along those lines. He heard a loud thud that was for sure. He whipped around to come face-to-face with an Aiko that had her nose touching his own. Her normally violet eyes, so much similar to that of his own mother, were replaced with glowing, intricate magic circles.

"Chill girl, I'm not going to go around spilling the secret." He said with the most amount of interest in his voice as possible.

"Oh? And what proof do you have that you won't just go around and tell as many people as you possibly can? What's to stop me from just disintegrating you right here and now?" she seethed out. Her eyes began to glow dangerously. It would seem that the only reason she hadn't killed him by now was that she had some form of attachment to him.

Then he did something she didn't expect.

He poked her forehead, and pushed her back. Making her land on her ass as she stared up at him on shock.

 _Only one other person has done that to me…_

Mister Uzu, who was still holding onto the player pin, raised an eyebrow that time. It would seem her mental defenses went down when she was either shocked, caught off guard, or surprised. With a shrug he began to refill his coffee, not saying anything to the goddess in a maid outfit. When his cup was refilled he turned back around, took a sip, and looked the girl in the eye.

"Women are troublesome."

The goddess's eye twitched once, twice, and thrice before she stood back up, and snapped her fingers. Mister Uzu sensed a surge of magic around the girl before she was enveloped in a blinding light; luckily his trusty shades protected him.

 _Meh, feels like a seal just got broken._

When the light died down, in place of the girl-in-a-maid outfit was a grown women. Her crimson red hair was gathered into two buns on the side of her head, and pushed through as pigtails that reached her thighs. The back of her head had a pigtail that reached down, and acted like an Obi (the ribbon thing…I think) of the crimson kimono that ended at her knees with black flame patterns at the edges.

Her face was an ageless one, one second it looked twenty, the next fifty. But that did not detract from the beauty of it all. The massive Double-D breasts that the Kimono offered the cleavage of was a nice bonus as well. Her legs had some strange, wire and silk like stockings on them. For some reason however, she was barefoot. Her hands were held in front of her, interlocked together as she stared at mister Uzu.

"…eh, I give it an eight."

Another thud sound was heard as Mister Uzu took another sip of his coffee. "Ah, that's the good stuff." He murmured aloud.

" **You dare to give me, the Goddess of fire and rage, an eight!? Why is it not a ten!? Am I not worthy of such a high rating!?"** she screeched out to Mister Uzu. Shaking her fists in rage, pure and primal. A feminine rage that comes from someone insulting her beauty.

"I gave you a nine when you were in the outfit. Nice, petite, and adorable. Not voluptuous and boingy." He stoically responded while chewing on a doughnut.

Aiko glared at Mister Uzu before she thought about what that statement implied. She gasped and pointed a dramatic, accusing finger at him. "You're a Lolicon!" she yelled out to the world.

"And daaaaaamn proud of it!" he responded cheekily, all the while with a smile on his face.

"Damnit! That's my younger sister's territory! I can't do anything to you now!" she raged as the coffee shop owner's decaf dispenser exploded behind him. With a wave of the male redhead's hand, the dispenser repaired itself. Although the raging beauty before him didn't seem to notice his use of magic to fix it.

She then whipped around and glared at the man behind the counter. He raised an eyebrow at her. "Are you finally going to order something?" he questioned as he finished off his doughnut. With a resigned sigh, she gave him her answer.

"…regular, black, with a little bit of sweetener in it." She replied.

* * *

 **-OST: TWEWY: NOISY NOISE-**

The landscape of the valley was now ½ destroyed. Craters littered the area, tree bark and tree bits were everywhere, and the two combatants, Rojang the monster, and Naruto the mage, were still going at it.

Naruto jumped from his spot on Rojang's arm just in time to avoid the monster trying to swat him off. Flipping through the air, the mage gathered magic into his hand, and compacted it until it was set to blow.

" ** _One Stroke, Vast Wealth!_** " he yelled out from his spot in the air, and a powerful burst of orange and brown energy left his hand, and exploded against Rojang's back, making the powerful beast groan in pain.

Naruto landed back onto the ground, feet first, but Rojang was quicker. Getting back a second wind, Rojang roared, beat its chest, and gathered energy in its mouth. Seeing the attack coming, Naruto summoned forth his **_Crackle Pop Barrier_** and readied himself for the impact.

Although the attack that came from the monster was not one that he had expected. Instead of a mighty lazer, it was a surge, a stream of yellow lightning erupted from its mouth, and speeded towards Naruto quicker than a flash. Piercing the **_Crackle Pop Barrier_** and throwing the mage backwards.

Groaning as he stood up, the man berated himself. "Shoulda used the **_Carcin_** instead of my weakest defensive move…But that would have meant that I would have to activate my eye." He grimaced.

And then he saw the bull-like monster charging towards him, again. The mage decided that he wouldn't use the same strategy as before, and opted to instead use a different spell to stop, or at the very least slow down his opponent.

Instead he pointed out his hand, and focused his magic into the air around Rojang, and cast the spell he wanted to use. " ** _Long Live the Rock!_** " he shouted as the monster rushed towards him. It took three seconds, but it worked.

Were once stood a monstrous behemoth, was now that very same monster, incased in stone, immobile. Although it would seem that its sudden petrification would not hold, as the stone monster was wriggling back and forth.

Capitalizing on his enemies' state of incarceration, Naruto used the spell **_Top Gear_** to teleport in front of the hulking beast, and began an onslaught of attacks. His arms blurred from the pure speed of his strikes as he swiped again and again at the beast chest. His hands themselves becoming like blades due to the power of the spell **_Kanesada_**.

But he did not stop there. The moment he finished his razor-sharp swiped at the tough hide of Rojang, he began gathering magic into his palms. Lance-like protrusions made from pure magic erupted from his hands, and he began a stellar flurry attack against that same spot he had used **_Kanesada_** on.

He slammed his palm against the bleeding and cut chest of Rojang once, and then twice.

And then six times, and then twenty four times. This was the spell technique known simply as **_Unjo_**. A spell that allowed gave one a powerful burst of speed, that in turn, allowed one to inflict multipole amounts of damage to a target with powerful thrusts.

The resulting **_Kanesada Unjo_** combo was powerful enough to cause the great beast to flinch, break from its prison, and send in backwards by two steps. The Rojang stood still to catch its breath as it tried to battle through the pain that was coursing through its chest. It put one hand on the spot with the most pain.

And pulled it back to reveal blood on its hand.

Its own blood.

It was not the shock that it was bleeding; it was the mere quantity of the blood on its hand.

It was absolutely drenched.

The beast did only one action. It grinned.

And looked up to see its adversary lunging at it with a yellow blade in hand. The spell **_Kewl Line_** was what gave the mage its sword.

"Outa my face!" Naruto yelled out as his blade descended on Rojang's uncovered chest that was bleeding. It was a straight cut through it, not diagonal or of any other direction. The beast cried out in pain, but it fought through it, and slammed its meaty hand into Naruto's chest. Cracking bones and breaking a rib as he was sent flying.

As the two opponents stood up, they glared at each other. And then an understanding passed between them. And then they grinned.

And thus, the battle was started anew.

 **-OST: END-**

* * *

 **-OST: TWEWY: Game over-**

Dashing through the streets on his skateboard, a figure the age of seventeen wearing a gray jacket that had white fur at the cuffs, bottom, and hood leapt in joy as he spinned through the air on his board. He was wearing white shorts and gray shoes while a golden cube rested against his chest, tied around to his neck by a gold chain.

The most remarkable thing about him was his long nails, like claws, the slitted pupil of his brown eyes, the red fang like marks on his cheeks, and the fangs in his mouth. There was little to no doubt, that he was a feral and wild person.

"Yahoo mosacras! Out of the way! Makin' a delivery!" he yelled out to all the people that were in the street. And it would seem that they had already been in motion the moment they heard his voice, rather than his words.

However, it would seem that two people in particular didn't know the law of the city of Crocus. A particular law that says, 'When Kiba Inuzuka is telling people to get out and dodge, you get the fuck out and dodge.' Both women oddly had the very same red fang-like markings on their cheeks that Kiba did, but made no move to get out of the way.

So, the skateboarder that was clutching a white package in his hand simply jumped over them. Grabbing his skateboard with his free hand, and using a small application of magic, the Inuzuka soared above the two of them, not even bothering to see just who was new in town to not know the law of the street.

But while he didn't see them, they did. And both of their eyes widened in shock. Both said nothing as they watched the wild boy speed down the street and turn a corner at 120 degrees, all the while going at sixty miles per hour.

The woman who looked to be in her twenty's blinked owlishly as she continued to stare at the street the boy turned at. "Mom…was that really…?" she asked. Her voice filled with uncertainty.

The older woman, and by far the most feral looking one to ever exist, simply shook her head. "It wasn't him pup…while at the same time it was. Pretty damn confusing if you ask me."

The younger of the two, and the now named daughter of the feral looking woman, looked to her companion. "But he looked so much like him…so why did he smell like cats?" she asked.

The older one shook her head again. "Like I said, it's him. But at the same time it ain't him. I think it might be a good idea to hang out here for a while…and see if this one is as idiotic as ours was."

And like that, the two women blended back into the crowd. Away from prying eyes.

Meanwhile, in another spot in Crocus, specifically in a quaint little poetry bar. Well it was a really a place for people to go up on stage before a café crowd and sing something. It was a place that was located at the northeast end of Crocus, more specifically, across from a shop that catered to gothic Lolita clothing.

The group on stage went by the name 777. A group that had only recently made an appearance. It was three-man group of eighteen-year olds, led by a guy named Uchiha Sasuke: AKA player extraordinaire, he was the singer.

Dressed in an open black dress shirt and a dark blue T-shirt beneath, dark blue pants, black shoes, and wearing a silver skull necklace, he was immensely popular with the ladies…despite his track record of broken hearts.

The second member was a guy by the name of Shikamaru Nara. An incredibly lazy, but smart **Shadow** mage. He was the one on guitar/bass. It was hard to tell considering it was a magic instrument that changed its sound according to the users wishes. Kinda took out all the skill involved with playing an instrument…maybe that's why he played it?

There really wasn't much to the guy. Black eyes and hair tied into a ponytail style. An open green jacket on top of a black T-shirt, and black pants that ended at his ankles, and sandals to top off his lazy, casual look.

The final member of the trio was the drummer, a man by the name of Neji Hyuga. A stoic male, but also a massive pervert. Which is odd considering that he is reportedly blind and wear's a bandage over his eyes. his long, silk-like black hair was tied into a braid, showing off his blank forehead. He wore a more conservative outfit than the other two members of 777.

He wore a simple white Kimono over a white shirt. On the back of the Kimono was a triple seven, the 777 logo. Grey pants covered his legs, and white shoes finished off the outfit.

 _Tell me who you are, and who you were_

 _How much have you been paid?_

 _Take it easy._

 _R.E.L.A.X_

 _Would you like something to drink?_

 _"To tell the truth, in this contract I don't care about anything except me" "Just want the cash, transferred to my account"_  
 _Because it will make me feel alright_

Of course while a lot of the people gathered to listen to the music played by the band, a great many of the female's had gathered simply to ogle the two pretty boys of the band, Neji and Sasuke. None more than two people in the very back of the available booths had only arrived so that they may simply look at the singer and drummer.

 _He's got an opinion and posted a suggestion but never reveals his name_

 _"_ _Read by someone, taken as a good one but no one knew who wrote it"_

 _Few lines of the sentences lie_

 _Anonymity is annoying me all the time_

 _"_ _It's like "2 channel" were people can just throw their own anger"_

 _And forget about those foul actions_

Those two women were very similar in appearance. Both wore simple dresses, one was black and the other a very dark blue. Both women had very strange eyes however. The black haired and blue dressed woman had red eyes with a black six pointed star design in them, while the blue haired and black dressed woman had strange crystalline eyes with a floral pattern outside of them, with but a hint of lavender coloring.

Both of them had matching hairstyles, long and down the back. And for some odd reason, both had wine glasses filled with a couple century old wine, while everyone else had coffee, juice, soda, or wine. It was a no alcohol place. And yet, no one was giving the two of them any flack.

 _"_ _Your driving an expensive car, expectance, supremacy"_

 _Your out of control; the troll is waiting down below_

 _You still lack in experience_

 _"_ _Too bad, too close, too late to notice where you are"_

 _There's no other way to take_

 _"_ _Dependency to the tendency; occasionally you misunderstood"_

 _"_ _Living the life of mediocrity? Hypocrisy, Legitimacy"_

 _Go over it or game over now?_

 _Is this a suitable place to strive?_

 _"_ _Say, "Down" to it or drown by it"_

 _It's your turn to throw the dice_

"Hamura…I think we've seen enough. We should go now." Spoke the star-eyed woman to her companion. The woman simply nodded her head, and as if they never even existed, the two women vanished.

No one saw Neji grimace the moment the two women seemingly disappear. No one but the ever vigilant Shikamaru…

 **-OST:END-**

* * *

Aiko huffed as she exited the coffee shop known as '36', now back in her cover form: the schoolgirl that was very into fashion. She still had the coffee that she ordered though. It was only half full. It was only by the grace of her own magic-enhanced body heat that it wasn't cold yet.

She idly noted the strange skull and cross graffiti decal outside on one of 36's window as she went back into the crowd. Passing by the duo from the earlier concert without so much as nod in their direction due to the thoughts bouncing in her skull.

And then she stopped, realized who she passed, and had only one thought go through her head.

 _Was that auntie Mama-Mikoto and Mama-Hamura? How, I am really out if it if I didn't notice I passed by them…oh crap their going into 36! But I'm pretty sure that Mister Uzu won't do anything stupid now that he knows all about my family…I hope._

* * *

"Heya! Welcome to 36, whatcha want?" Mister Uzu said with small wave and a nice guy smile on his face as he leaned against the back of the counter, his back towards his two customers.

The two of them were silent, leaving a rather uncomfortable atmosphere in the air. Making Mister Uzu chuckle nervously. "Uh…is there something on my face miss…?" he left the question hanging on the end.

It was the crimson and star-eyed lady who spoke up. "It's nothing…we just thought that you were someone else for a second. And it's Mikoto. Mikoto Oostusuki." She then pointed to the woman next to her, who was still staring at Mister Uzu. "And this is my...friend, Hamura Oostusuki." She said with a bit of uncertainty at the 'friend' word.

"You two sisters?"

"Something like that." She quipped. She was obviously not in the talking mood, nor was her partner apparently. He refrained from using the player pin to scan their minds, he had already invaded the privacy of one person already, and he didn't feel like doing the same to two other people, at least not today.

"You two ordering for here or to go?"

"To go." Was the curt reply from Hamura, the woman with the freaky eyes that seemed to be holding back a lot of power. Mikoto then ordered for the two of them seeing as Hamura wasn't going to say anything. Just the regular whirlpool special, apparently Mikoto had heard great things about it from their daughter, and then the two left just as swiftly as they came.

"Hey idiot, you do realize they left without paying right?"

"Flowey, I am many things. But I am not stupid enough to ask a goddess, much less two, to pay up for something that they can just conjure up. That's just rude and suicidal when one of the goddess's is sexist."

"Aren't you just glad that that meatback with milk whoppers told you pretty much everything?"

Mister Uzu whipped around to face the potted plant that sat in his window. Flowey the flower was more of a partner and acquaintance than a friend. He could look all cheerful and nice one second, and become the most evil and cold hearted monster the second. But damn if he wasn't good at being an informant and gathering information.

Really, the only reason he stuck around Mister Uzu and his fellow employees was because interesting stuff happened around them. Then again, maybe the small shred of compassion that the monster had gained from encountering the most evil and fear inspiring being ever had something to play into it.

"You mean from the fact that Naruto's mother is the head of this world's pantheon of gods, that she had three wives, and that all of her children are gods that embody different aspects of the world in their true forms? From the god that cursed Zeref, to the one that gave magic to all humans in place of chakra?"

"Yep. Although wouldn't that Kushina bitch be your mother too considering your special…condition?" Flowey said with a lowered brow and a cheeky grin.

"…I refuse to see how a megalomaniac can be my mother. Besides, aren't you a god yourself with those six human souls you have under your belt?"

The plant shrugged as it basked in the sunlight. "Meh, I got god-like power, but really, being a reality warper doesn't make me a god. Give me the souls of one million monsters and seven more human souls, AND THEN I would be a god. And you would be dead. As would be everyone else."

Mister Uzu blinked at Flowey's admission. "One million? That seems a bit much doesn't it?"

"Hey, I'm not the one who made the rules. And it can't be weak monsters either. It has to be something like Rojang."

"Rojang?"

"I forgot that idiots like you that have actual jobs and don't just look at a fellow destruction lover getting the shit kicked out of them."

"Do I even want to know?"

Flowey's smile suddenly became very monstrous and evil as he leered at Mister Uzu. "You'll see when Naruto gets back…and he better have that hairy idiot's soul when he gets back…"

Mister Uzu simply fixed the evil flower with a look before he shrugged. "Whatever Flowey, I'm going to bed and closing up shop. It's been a slow day and I don't think anyone else is going to stop by. If you want your water its over by the counter."

That seemed to make Flowey happy. "Yeah Nigga give me dat drank!" he singed out.

Mister Uzu only looked back with a stare before he went upstairs to sleep.

* * *

 **Yes, Naruto's magic is based off of the pins from The World Ends With You. There are too many fics that either give him dragonslayer or Godslayer, or some other kind of Slayer. So I decided to give him something interesting, Unique, and awesome. Seriously, who doesn't love the name 'Superfine Beam'?**

 **Yep, Kushina's a lesbian. And she's got three wives. It's pretty damn obvious who they are. And no I didn't make her one simply because I felt like it. The reason is integral into her reason for going bonkers and becoming a god. And yes, those three do play a part into it all.**

 **Not going to take any crap about the whole Kushina having a harem of women thing…does three people count as a harem? And yes, there are no gods, only goddess's. There is also a reason for that as well.**

 **And to the people from the past reviews, and the future reviews, just because someone does something you don't like doesn't mean the stories bad. It might seem stupid, but then it ends up coming to play later in the future. If you say something along the lines, about my story, like 'it's ruined' or 'this is trash' then you may go fuck yourself. If I write it in it's for a reason, not a whim.**

 **Left a clue for people to guess where this story is currently at in the fairy tail storyline.**

 **Next chapter: Do you really think your still my mother?**

 **AND THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE!**

 **CUE THE AIRHORNS!**

 **BABABABWAAAAAAAAA!**


	3. Do you really think your still my mother

**This should clear up some confusion. No seriously, it should. I'm like totally for realzies serious here. Don't trust me? Go fuck a chicken. It's nice out here in texas. So if your reading this on your computer…go outside and read this mother-fuckin best seller crap out on a bench.**

 **Real talk? Enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

 **CHAPTER TWO: Do you really think your still my mother?**

From dawn till dusk Naruto fought against Rojang, a monster that he named upon seeing the prowess of the behemoth. It was a brutal fight that ruined the valley that Rojang called its hunting ground. Of course at the end of it both combatants, monster and mage, were both too tired to actually finish off the job.

So they came to a mutual agreement to fight another day. Rojang was surprisingly an intelligent monster, capable of somewhat complex thought, but couldn't communicate it. Its vocal cords were built through years of evolution to be used to install fear, announce its presence, and roar out challenges. Naruto simply dragged himself out of the valley through the night, and made his way towards the nearest town with a train station.

All without sleep. Nothing a few healing spells couldn't fix, it just wasn't healthy. Despite what people think, using magic to get rid of fatigue and healing is not a good idea. Because it simply takes it away and doesn't get the body used to the feelings of tiredness and pain.

So upon arriving at a non-descript town that he really couldn't bother learning the name of, Naruto walked the cobblestone roads to the train station, and was about to try and sleep in his compartment when he took stock of the person that was sitting across from him.

"Why hello there…my little Naru-chan." Came the mirthful voice of Kushina Uzumaki. Sitting cross-legged, with two Crimson blonde twins by her sides. She had changed since he last saw her. But not in any way he had expected.

Naruto stared at her. Not one sound made it out of his mouth as he stared at her. Or more specifically. The Rinnegan eyes on her open palms, the horns that were jutting out of her head, the floral pattern eyes that had taken the place of her violet ones, and the crimson, ringed, and tomoe patterned eye on her forehead.

Her clothing was incredibly different from what he remembered as well. She wore a transitional high-collared princess-kimono that was adorned with intricate gold and purple lines with tomoe running down the center and edges of the gown.

Her crimson hair had changed. It now had silver intermingled into the ethereal silk-like strands of dead skin cells.

"Let's have a little talk son. But first…say hello to your little sisters like a good boy would you?"

The only thing that Naruto did was glare at his mother while suddenly closing his right eye, and keeping it sealed as orange light shined beneath the fleshy folds. That seemed to please Kushina as she smiled at him. Not the loving smile she flashed him like when she impaled him with her hand, but a happy smile. Like a dog she personally trained just did a proper trick on her command.

"Good. You know your betters in this situation. It fills me with a…sense of pride to know that the child I helped raise is good mannered."

A growl almost escaped his throat as he suddenly covered up his left eye with his hand. A snarl formed on his lips, but never made itself manifest. "What do you want…Mother?" he spated out with venom, there was a particularly toxic dosage when he said 'Mother'.

Kushina frowned. Then glowered at her son. The twins at her sides tensed as they looked fearfully at their mother. "Is that any way to address the woman who birthed you into the world after so long since I last saw you?" she questioned with a cold, steely voice. And like that, the entire temperature of the room dropped and a suffocating aura replaced the air in the compartment.

Naruto fell out of his seat, unable to stand up to, much less sit in the compartment underneath the crushing pressure that his goddess of a mother was permuting. He began to gasp for air and struggled to breath.

 _"_ _Say it."_ She hissed at him, _"_ _Beg for forgiveness you petulant child!"_

Naruto tried to struggle to his knees underneath the overwhelming pressure. And slowly he did. He glared into his mother's eyes. "I…" he gasped out, "I…will…never…beg…anything…from…you…" he choked out while never breaking eye contact with the goddess before him.

Kushina laughed at him, a laugh of amusement. "So defiant…just like your father when I was bisected him." She stated while Naruto fell back down to the ground. The twins to her sides looked at the eldest child of Kushina with pity, pity for being on the receiving end of their mother's hair-trigger temper.

"…But I guess that's part of what made me love you when you were a child. I do so hate it when people Immedianlty bow to me. It gets so stale after a while. So to see someone openly defy me, especially my own flesh and blood…it makes me proud."

And like that the pressure ceased. Naruto crawled back to his knees and puked out his guts, earning looks of pure disgust from the three females present. Kushina then snapped her fingers, her third eye glowed, and the entire train compartment changed.

Naruto suddenly found himself sitting in an incredibly comfy chair that was the color of gold, while sitting across from him were his mother and sisters. But the entire compartment had changed entirely. Gone was the train compartment with just legroom and a window. There were now in a giant room that was plated gold. The chairs and couch that the room's occupants were sitting on were in top of a rug with the Uzumaki swirl taking up a majority of the center. And in between Naruto and his other family members, was a glass coffee table, with the handle parts seemingly made out of diamond.

"Now then…I believe that we have some things to talk about. Like how you escaped from the Voidlands when I was trying for hundreds of years to pull you out of it." Kushina spoke with authority as she folded her hands, and crisscrossed her legs.

And like that, she had Naruto's full attention.

* * *

CAT, a graffiti artist that branched out into numerous media. From video's, to street art, to clothing design, and etc. Known, loved, and famous to all, CAT was a massive hit with its 'Live life to its fullest' appeal.

But CAT was anonymous. There was no real 'face' to cat. There was just the stuff that CAT did, and that was all people could pin to CAT. As such, people didn't know that CAT was in actuality, a group of people that got together to do their thing.

Mister Uzu: the base cover.

Nara Shikamaru: the planner.

Uchiha Sasuke: the advertiser.

Kiba Inuzuka: the supplier.

Neji Hyuga: the drawer.

Naruto Uzumaki: the inspiration.

Flowey: the eyes and ears.

And finally, Kiba's cat: the-unnoficial-mascot-that-isn't-really-publicly-known-but-is-rather-the-source-of-the-name.

These seven (eight) people make up CAT. And their unofficial meeting place (unofficial because they didn't tell anyone about it) was the coffee shop known as 36 (read as thirty-six and not three-six). These six humans and one plant gathered together because of one thing.

They could all see the UG, which stood for the UnderGround. It was the reality where the Reaper's game took place. It was a place for the dead to fight for their lives, literally.

The Reaper's game was a seven day event were recently dead souls would give up the thing they consider to be the most precious, partner up, and try to survive the seven day onslaught. Those that failed to be partnered up had their souls erased by the Noise, and ceased to exist.

Noise, the means by which Reaper's would eliminate players. Noise was essentially soul frequency waves given form. There are multiple kinds of Noise. Red, which would attack you if you didn't have a partner. Yellow, which is created, encourages, and feeds from the negativity that surrounds people. Blue, which is incredibly powerful Noise that acts the same as Red Noise. And finally, Taboo Noise. Which attacks anything that is human and not Noise. It is a type of Noise that is illegal to be made among the Reaper's, and the penalty is erasure should anyone create it. There are also the relatively harmless (minus two examples) Pig Noises which are green in color. Those kinds don't actively seek anything. They just exist.

Each day, a mission would be issued out by the game master, the Reaper in charge of that specific game. They were the ones that surviving players would have to fight should they reach the end of the seven day event. Should the game master be erased, one player will be resurrected, and time will rewind by one week, the day the person died. But should even one of the missions be failed before the time limit, all the participating players would be erased.

CAT was more than just a simple artist group. CAT was a group that did what they could to help out the player's that were in the Reaper's game. Through observation, and experimentation with captured Noise, they were able to invent a decal that, when drawn on a building, would allow players to become visible in that specific establishment.

Things like pins and clothes act differently in the UG in comparison to the RG, the RealGround were the living existed. Pins would grant people certain abilities of their Psi frequency matched to that of the pin, and different clothing would grant buffs in vitality, durability, or offensive power. And considering Noise dropped money and other pins…well suffice to say, the player survival rate increased exponentially.

Of course when this happened, the Reapers tried to remove the decals. But they found that they couldn't. In the end the composer, the one in charge of everything, decided that they should be kept. No one raised any complaint. You don't go against a decision made by the composer, not unless you wanted to die.

Apparently the reasoning was that it made the game more interesting. Leading the members of CAT to deduce that the composer only saw the game as a source of amusement. This in turn led to CAT's second goal, hijacking the game and disassembling it. They of course made sure that none of the Reaper's found out about that little tidbit considering that the Reaper's actually enjoyed their RG/UG life.

As such, CAT's base of operations was based in Crocus, the place where the composer was known to appear the most. That isn't to say that Crocus was the only place where the Reaper's game took place. In fact, there are multiple locations where the Reaper's game happens. It just happens that Crocus is the place most often used, with Magnolia coming in as a close second.

Each member of CAT acted independently, spreading their influence any way they could. It just happened that the graffiti artist sticht is what the crowd ate up, and it became their main thing. And so the 'live life to its fullest, without regrets' outlook that CAT adopted became its message to the world. However, each Sunday morning, every member of CAT met up at the 36 coffee shop to discuss anything relevant to their plans.

And one such meeting was taking place right now.

Mister Uzu sat down on his couch, nibbling on a toasted bagel, in the part of his coffee shop that he liked to call 'the relaxation area that just happens to be very much like a café'. In a somewhat circle sat every member of CAT, minus Uzumaki. Sitting on the same couch as him, petting a bobcat that was in his lap was the 'The Delivery Man' Kiba Inuzuka, a cat lover and resident hater of all things dog.

On a couch across from the two of them were the members of 777. Sasuke Uchiha, 'The Advertiser', sat relaxed, leaning back with his feet up on a cushion stand as he had his trademark smirk on his face, a cup of coffee in the hand that wasn't leaning on the arm rest. Shikamaru Nara, 'The Strategist', took up the rest of the brown couch, lying down while leaning on the other ends armrest, tuning his magic guitar with a bored expression on his face.

By the window of their little area hidden behind a bookshelf was Flowey the flower, 'The Eyes and Ears', as he sunbathed in his pot, a cruel and evil smile on his face as he giggled about something. Neji Hyuga, 'The Drawer', sat by the same window on an incredibly comfy chair, drawing a picture with his blue pen. A calm smile on his face as blood leaked from his nose.

Mister Uzu then cleared his throat, but didn't stand up, signifying that the meeting was about to start. Everyone present stopped what they were doing, to a degree, and looked up to the ringleader of their little gathering.

"Gentlemen, I have some rather interesting information to share with you all. It's a game changer boys, and it came from Aiko of all people." he surmised with a grin, his shades glinting in light of his proclamation.

Shikamaru sighed as he sank into the couch even more. "This is going to be something incredibly troublesome that will make me have to rethink all of our contingency plans isn't it?"

"Well, he did say it was a game changer you idiot. I like to think that means at least something will change from all this monotony. Or is that too complex for your feeble human to comprehend?" spoke the resident evil flower in a snide tone.

Neji frowned at the flower. "Flowey, we don't need that kind of attitude here. Just go back to sunbathing." He spoke calmly. Of course the flower just looked at the Hyuga with a raised eyebrow and a blank face.

"Fine. I already know what you morons are going to discuss so I'll just go back to doing what I like to do." he responded with a glare.

"Sucking the world dry?" piped in Sasuke.

"Devouring the souls of innocents?" added Kiba.

"Being an ass?" finished Shikamaru.

Flowey's smile turned demonic as his eyes became black beady dots. "Maybe I won't spare all of you when I obtain god status…"

Mister Uzu waved him off. "You love us too much to do that. Kill us? Nope. But hold our souls hostage? A definite yes." He jibbed with a smile. He did enjoy these meetings. Then again, the bickering was normally everyone against Flowey.

Flowey flashed his signature monster smile. "Just get this over with so that I can be in piece. I have some idiots I need to track down later…"

And like that, all the attention was focused back on Mister Uzu. Leaning back into his couch, a smirk graced his features as he pulled a doughnut from his **Equip** space. "Tell me guys, what do you know about Fiore's, and by extension the whole worlds pantheon of gods…or rather Goddesses?"

* * *

"Each Goddess is one of my daughters. And each and every one of them is bound to an aspect, or element of the mortal world. Embodying that trait in their true guise. The world has been this way since I reclaimed by full power…and gained even more." Kushina spoke as she drank from a cup of tea.

Naruto stared at her with a neutral expression, His left ankle was lying on his knee, the way a man crossed his legs. His right eye was glowing a bright orange color was orange wisps floated upwards from it. Behind him floated three monstrous skulls that were curved, had mandibles, and had a void in place of their eye sockets, with orange eyes. These were his **Gaster Blasters** , and they were poised to strike at a moment's notice.

He passed a glance to the twins that sat at his mother's side. They both wore matching dresses that hugged their bodies. Both were in the color of white, and had Nine Magetama around the neck area, circling it. Their fingers were manicured a deep shade of red. And their eyes were purple and ringed, with Tomoe swirling and circling on the rings. And just like Kushina, they were barefoot.

Kushina took one look at his bored expression and snapped her manicured and claw-like fingers. The door of the ridiculously large train compartment opened and in walked two maids wearing red and white Kitsune masks. They were balancing trays of tea on her their palms as one walked over to Naruto and kneeled down beside him, offering him a cup of steaming tea.

A maid performed the same for Kushina, and the twins. Casting a scrutinizing glare at the tea, he relented and took it from the tray. Their jobs done, the Kitsune-masked maids took their leave after bowing to the rooms occupants.

Taking a sip of his tea he noticed that it tasted the same as the tea that his mother would pour for him when he was still a kid. He sent a raised eyebrow at the woman across from him as she closed her eyes…but not the third eye or the eyes on her palms. He then took a deep breath and thought over his current situation and his feelings to his mother in general.

To put it mildly, he was confused. What did she want? Why did she want to ascend to godhood? Why was she seeing him now when if she was a god she could have visited him any time she wanted? What did she mean she tried for hundreds of years to pull him out of the Voidlands? Just how did she get so many damn children?

Did she even love him like she claimed when he was dying in a pool of his own blood? Did he even love her after his…birthday bash? Should he even care? Did he even miss her like that aching feeling in his chest told him, or did he just long for the woman she used to be?

Shaking these thoughts from his head he cleared his mind and set him priorities. Right now he needed information. First he needed to know how she found him, and if she always knew where he was. He needed to know what her plans were for him, because that's the only thing that could have caused her to pay a personal visit to him. And lastly he needed to know how he could wiggle himself out of this mess he unknowing walked into.

Before he could say anything, she spoke up. "I have only seen those used against me by one other being. Did you hope that you could intimidate me just by simply showing me those weapons? If so, you are a pathetic fool who doesn't know his own place." She told him without even looking at him, only examining her nails.

Naruto's eye twitched as he gripped his cup with much more force that necessary. _'Bitch. Are you even my mother? Or has your power gone to your head?_

"Did you learn nothing from when you experienced my presence child? Put those away before I make you." she commanded with the authority that only a god could command. With a pointed glare directed at Naruto, who glared right back. However, he had no inkling to experience that horrible pressure again, so with a pulse of his magic, the **Gaster Blasters** went back into his own personal pocket void.

Kushina smiled at Naruto. A proud smile. Whether it was herself for being able to control Naruto or from Naruto actually learning not to cross her only she knew. "Good. You're learning. Allow me to ask a question my child, what do you know of the other pantheons of gods, and of the outer beings?"

* * *

"But as it turns out, there are more than one pantheon's. A lot of grumpy ass old men consider Kushina to be a bit of upstart, but are afraid of calling her out. Kinda funny that gods are in actuality pansy's right?" joked Mister Uzu as he nibbled on sesame seed bagel.

Sasuke simply looked confused at that statement. "How the hell do other pantheon's exist if this worlds only Pantheon is Kushina's? Your kinda contradicting yourself there buddy." He spoke up while drinking from his coffee, having just gotten back from refilling it.

He then slouched into the couch, going back into the same position he was in before he left for his refill. Shikamaru gave him a dry look as he pushed his feet away from his spot on the couch. Neji just continued on with his drawing, having one ear open for the information dump.

Flowey was nowhere to be seen, having left to go hunt down some poor unsuspecting monster or going out of his way to corrupt an innocent child. Sasuke just gave Mister Uzu a blank look, telling him to explain what he missed out on. But surprisingly it was Kiba that took the spotlight as his cat layed down on his head.

"It's because Kushina's power revolves around creating and destroying dimensions and reality. That's pretty OP, but it has also lets her travel to other worlds…where she has free reign to piss off other gods and make them her bitches." He said with grin.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at that little tidbit of knowledge. Taking a sip as he worked his brain for how that could have turned out. "And let me guess…those old men she pissed off want revenge don't they?"

"Bingo." Answered Shikamaru as he strummed his guitar. His face then took on a sour expression at the noise. He then went back to tuning his instrument in his search for making his guitar create his desired sound.

A sigh drew the attention to Mister Uzu. "We don't know the specifics, but they tricked her into a bet. A bet that involves a certain member of Fairy Tail. And sad to say we don't know what it was that was bet either. Only that its bad news if she loses the bet she made." He elaborated. He hummed in thought for a second before he continued. "But on the bright side, we know what member of Fairy Tail that Kushina bet on." He said with a frown.

"Why do I get the feeling that I'm about to be told some bad news?" said Sasuke with a pointed look.

Neji threw a Newspaper at him for his question. With a glare, Sasuke took the Newspaper off of his face, and took one good look at the headline of the main article. "…Son of a bitch. It was her of all people?" he asked the gathered members of CAT.

Everyone replied with a solemn nod. Sasuke took a resigned sigh. "We can only hope that she wins this game…today's Sunday right? The day that the players are given the go-to to snipe out the game master?" he asked Mister Uzu across from him.

The owner of 36 nodded his head. That was all that Sasuke needed as he tossed the newspaper back behind the couch. When it landed, the headline was laid before the world.

 _Tragedy! The death of Titania Erza!_

Mister Uzu then clapped his hands. Bringing everyone out of the funk and back into the present. With a smirk he continued on. "Now that that's out of the way, I have some more news to share with everyone concerning the reports I've been making on our…old home. But before that, is there anything any of you would like to show the rest of us?"

Neji raised his hand, making everyone present raise eyebrows at him. Kiba picked off his cat from his head and began to pet it, making the adorable little kitten pure. "Neji, I swear to whatever gods that exist besides Kushina, if that is another of your naked woman drawings, I will personally kick your ass six ways to Sunday." The cat lover deadpanned.

Neji only smirked at the feral boy while Shikamaru muttered his family's catchphrase. "You can try Kiba, but we both know just how much better I am than you in a straight up fight." And with that, he flipped over his drawing and showcased it to the other members of CAT.

The reactions were varied; Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, but committed the well-drawn picture to memory. Kiba glared at the Hyuga, but gave up and exhaled a sigh. Mister Uzu looked at the picture very closely, like he had recognized it from somewhere. And Sasuke?

The guy had two Uzi's in hand. Guns akimbo.

"Neji, why the fuck did you draw a naked picture of my mother?"

* * *

"Why did you come after me then? What's the point? But more importantly, how did you find me if you couldn't locate me before?"

His demands were not unreasonable. In fact, they were something many people probably would have asked if they were in his situation. And it would seem that Kushina was in agreement with him. Whether it was because of possible remorse for her actions, or just that proclaimed love she had for him just before she sent his spirit to the Voidlands, he didn't know.

"During your battle with the beast you christened 'Rojang' one of my daughters was in the area, and she oversaw you clash with the powerful monster." His mother replied with a smile. A smile that had been on her face ever since he stopped trying to deny her, and be a snarky little fellow.

Not that anyone could blame him for being a little rude to the woman who had sent him to an equivalent of hell, but she seemed to pride herself on keeping order around her. This was a woman that demanded respect. And like all mothers she expected it the most from her own child.

"And I must say," She continued, "to know that you impressed one of your younger siblings with nothing but your battle prowess alone, has given me something to take pride in. Knowing that I have a child that although mortal, can fight on equal grounds with a monster that can make even gods draw blood."

Naruto gave his mother a frosty look, to which she didn't respond to at all unlike his previous glares and scrutinizing gazes/petty remarks and jabs. All that she did in response this time was smile at him. A smile filled with pride and love. Nothing like the smile she gave him when he first realized he was sitting in the same train compartment as the mother that killed all of his friends at his sixth birthday party.

Even the twins, who had yet to say anything, smiled at him. With the very same smile as their mother. ' _She probably raised them on the Uzumaki principles like me…hypocritical bitch. The very first lesson you told me was never to turn your back on family, those that do have revoked for right to be treated as an equal for doing so. So what does that make you?'_ he seethed in his mind.

Kushina's smile only widened after he finished his thought. "It would seem that you're learning that it is better not to belittle someone with your words. Some things are better left unsaid…I never got around to teaching you that lesson was I? Although I am happy that it seems that you have already learned it."

 _'_ _I take it back. My mother's not a bitch, she's the alpha bitch.'_

Kushina folded her hands into her lap as she watched her son sake a sip of the tea that her servants had brought for them. Who knew that those Progfox noise could be so useful? With a smile, she continued on with speaking. "The reason I have come after you…well, can't a mother check in on her own child? Even if he has moved out of the nest and is living with the rest of his flock?" she spoke. And in return, Naruto snorted.

It was not because of what she said, no: it was the delivery. She spoke as if she was speaking to a lesser being, like she was addressing an ant simply because she was bored. Her chin was held up high as she stared down her son across from her. That was what made Naruto snort.

"I see that you do not believe me…no matter. That is not the point of this visit. Yes I admit, I wanted to see you after so much time had passed since I held you in my arms, but I can ill afford do perform an action as thus, when I still have to tell you what you must do." she said with a dry tone, and a hint of longing that made Naruto really question if everything he was seeing his mother do was an act.

She acted like...THIS to him, made jabs at him, told him he was a disappointment, and then she would do the complete opposite. She would congratulate him, and tell him that she was proud of him for doing x thing. She would laugh at his expense, and then give him a loving smile that only a mother could give. Quite honestly, it made Naruto want to scream at her to make up her own damn mind about how she was going to treat him.

"You, you are a loophole in this bet I foolishly made Naruto…my son. As a goddess, I cannot involve myself in this gamble I have made even if it was to act as an advice giver. I cannot, in any shape or form, involve myself in this game or else I will lose my place as the supreme goddess of this world. Unlike the other gods, I have humanities best interests at heart…"

"They are not like me. They view humanity as nothing but playthings to do with as they want. to them, women are nothing but toys to have their way with. Children are naught but ants that should stay in line, lest they be stepped on. And regular everyday people are nothing but sacrifices that should feel privileged to be killed in their name."

"The same applies to them however. Should they be caught placing the balance of the scales in their favor, they will lose their tittles. And all that belongs to them will be mine. As such, I come to you and ask you one simple thing…go to Fairy Tail. And watch over the mortal form that belongs to one of my daughters. I ask nothing more and nothing less."

Naruto stared at Kushina for minutes on end, before he closed his eyes and entered deep thought.

* * *

"I'm sorry, but did you say that my mom's a goddess? The hell is you smoking…and where can I get some?" Sasuke said in clear disbelief of what he was just told. And who could blame him? He was just told that his mother, Uchiha Mikoto-the woman who has had a cursed record of her incredibly rich husbands dying a week after marrying her- was a goddess. And not only that!

According to Neji and Mister Uzu, she was at the concert two days ago, and had actually watched him and the rest of 777 play! What kinda shit were they talking here? He then bonked his twin Uzi's together, "You still haven't answered my damn question Hyuga! Why the fuck did you draw a naked picture of my mother!?"

Neji held up his hands, the picture was ripped to pieces on the rug in between them all as they stared at the stand-off between the Uchiha and the Hyuga. A nervous smile was on the blind man's face. Make no mistake, for all of his physical abilities, Neji Hyuga knew that it was not a god idea to be on the receiving end of those Uzi's; he had seen just what the Uchiha could do with them enough times to know that simple fact.

"Troublesome…" Shikamaru muttered as he cast a lazy glance at the sweating Neji. He then looked back to the Uchiha, who was now standing up with a burning fury in his eyes. This was the golden rule when it came to the Uchiha, never insult him mother. "I believe that it wasn't your mother per-say chief. I think it was simply another version of your mother that was watching our show up until the halfway point."

"Hn," he responded to the shadow-user. "If so, then when did she leave? And did she have company?" he questioned. Putting back his weapons into their hidden holsters around his knees. He then sat back down and got back down into his original reclining seating position. If there was one thing that everyone in CAT knew and respected, it was Shikamaru's ability to explain and win arguments. It was because of him that a lot of the group's problems and tensions were sorted out.

"Recon, most likely. I've been noticing a few people around town giving strange looks to me, 36, Mister Uzu, and the place in general. Noticed two ladies that smelled a shitton like dogs as well. Friggin' bitches…" reasoned Kiba as he stroked his cat.

Neji and everyone else nodded their heads at that sound statement. "She said something to her companion that I couldn't overhear over our blaring music, but she did leave when we were almost done playing 'Game over'. There was something familiar about her partner, but I really couldn't tell you anything else about her other than that because I couldn't get a very good read on either of the two of them."

Mister Uzu then clapped his hands. "We'll put that interesting little tidbit onto the back burner in the meantime. We're gonna need more info on that before we draw any conclusions such as motives, end goals, and countermeasures we should prepare."

Shikamaru strummed his guitar as he gave out a grunt. "That's a load of my back…at least for a little while. Man why does my job have to be such a drag?" the lazy man drawled out.

Sasuke simply smirked at his fellow CAT member's displeasure. "Probably because you're the only one qualified enough to do the smurt people things."

"That and you're the biggest lazy ass I've ever seen." Chimed in Kiba with a smirk as he snuggled his face up against his cats.

"Your also always shirking off of band practice." Added Neji while he reclined back into his couch chair.

"And you constantly freeload at my place." Chirped Mister Uzu with a smile and muffin in hand.

"Meow." The cat meowed.

"Fuck all of you." the guitarist deadpanned with a glare directed at all that were present. Yes even the cat. To which, they all replied with a silent smirk.

"Have I ever told any of you how much hate I have that is directed towards all of your existences? No? Well I fucking hate all of you." he continued with a smirk of his own, while drawing out a string of notes from his guitar that sounded incredibly sad, yet bored at the same time.

Chuckling, Mister Uzu clapped his hands again. "Well, now that we have heard Shikimaru's confession of hatred-"

"That burns with a thousand Forman grills!"

"-that burns with a thousand Forman grills yes, I would like to deliver my report concerning the time distbalances and constant restarting that the Reaper's game causes when a player wins the game." The smirk was gone now, and replaced with a stony face.

The atmosphere of the room went from lighthearted to uber serious in the span of that sentence. It was business time, and they knew it.

* * *

"Do you think your still my mother?"

It was a question. A question that had great significance. A question that mattered greatly to Naruto as he stared straight into his mother's eyes. Her mother's floral patterned, crystalline eyes that glowed with a hue of violet.

Did he really consider himself her own child? The bonds of family was not a bond made by blood, but by trust and love. Just because one carried the blood of another, did not make them family.

Does a mother love her child? Yes.

Does mother sing her child to sleep at night with a lullaby when they were afraid of nightmares? Yes.

Does a mother cook a meal and pour her love into the food? Yes.

Does a mother comfort her crying child when he was just bullied? Yes.

Does a mother murder her husband in cold blood for no reason? No.

Does a mother murder the peers and friends of her child? No.

Does a mother rip out a core of power that is tied to her child's soul? No.

Does a mother bath in the blood and tears of her child? No.

Does a mother send the spirit of her very own son, her very own child, to the hellish land of the Voidlands? Hell no.

Kushina smiled a loving smile towards her son, who still answered her with a hateful glare. "Of course I consider myself your mother. I brought you into this world. I bathed you and cleaned you. I sang you to sleep and soothed your dreams. I fed you and raised you. I taught you lessons and told you the simple truths of the world. I do not consider myself to be your mother. I know that I am your mother."

Naruto then closed his eyes, inhaled, exhaled, and then opened them. Staring hard into his mother's eyes with an intensity that caught the goddess slightly off guard. He then folded his arms and crossed his legs. His left eye then caught aflame with the ghostly orange it had before, with wisps of power floating upwards into the air.

"Answer me this. You could have just ripped the kyubi out of me, did your whole ascension to godhood bullshit and be done with it. Instead you murder my father, my friends, and you send my spirit off to the Voidlands. I can see you taking out father for a reason, he was a seal master and you didn't want take any chances. I can care less about being sent to the Voidlands, it was a blessing in disguise as far as I'm concerned…"

A scowl marred its way onto the only male child of Kushina.

"But I don't see any reason for why you butchered all of my friends. Sai, Choji, Shino, Ino, Kiba, Sasuke, Neji, Shikamaru, Sakura, Kakashi, Anko…you had nothing to gain from doing so. Every year, during my birthday…I go through each of their names and the memories I have with them. I've been doing that since year one through a thousand from the time I was stuck in the Voidlands. To this day I still do so. Tell me this…was that all part of the plan? To kill all of my friends?"

Both of the twins looked to their mother with confusion in their eyes. It would seem that they were kept out of the loop so to speak.

Kushina's smile changed to a frown at the question. A tilt of the head and a humming came from her throat. "It would seem that you do not understand the situation at the time…but to answer your question…I did plan on murdering all of those that claimed to be your friends. I killed the children that were only being used as political chips by their own parents."

The orange aura that surrounded Naruto's eye flashed red for but a split second.

"Did you truly believe that Minato actually cared for you? That our supposed 'famous' romance was actually true? That Minato 'saved' me from a Kumo kidnapping? What better way to insure the loyalty of the village jinchuriki than to make the demon container love the one who is being groomed to be the next Hokage?" the goddess spat out.

Naruto simply creased his eyebrows as a curious gaze replaced the look of seething rage that he was directing towards his mother.

"What better way to create a powerful tool for the village other than combining Uzumaki genetics seeped in Biju chakra-chakra that was originally MINE-and the secret descendent of the second Hokage Tobimira Senju? But then the masked man came along…he was the game changer. He was what restored my original memories. When he ripped the Kyubi out of me…I remembered my life as a princess in a patriarchal world. It was because of him that my original precious people remembered who they once were as well."

Quite honestly, Naruto expected a straight answer with a healthy amount of Bitch thrown in. He most certainly did not expect to receive a full-blown rant from his mother who may or not be a schizophrenic. But nonetheless, he still continued to pay attention to the ranting goddess.

"And your coward of a father, who rather than seal the biju into himself and sell his soul to the Shinmigami, decided that it would be a bright idea to split the beast in half. Sealing one-half of it into himself, instead of into its ex-host, and sealing the other half into his very own son…condemning him to the life of a jinchuriki, of a weapon. A tool that can be sacrificed at any given moment for the villages whims.

"And so…the village gets two weapons. A kage level shinobi with one-half the power of the strongest tailed beast, and a child with the other half, to be raised as a weapon. I believe they all expected me to die…and they all probably hoped so as well. Except for three that is…but regardless, I had stopped them from handing you over to a man known as Danzo."

An image of a bandaged man with one eye and one arm flashed through Naruto's mind in recollection. A grimace formed on Naruto's face as he squinted his eyes. Kushina smiled at her son when she saw him do so.

"Ah, so you remember. I do quite miss those times of peace and happiness…but regardless I won the court case in terms of you not being raised a weapon like poor little itachi was. To stay next to the other half of the kyubi, I decided that I wouldn't push for divorce…but I made sure that Minato knew I held no love for him. He was quite fine with that agreement. Considering that he had the power of the kyubi at his disposal…as well as a son to raise as a weapon."

The red-and-silver-haired woman then took a sip of her tea. A sigh escaping her lips as she continued her spiel.

"From there on, it was the happy times that you and I remember. For you, it was because you were an innocent child that I put a façade of loving until you told me the oath you took. For me, it was because I could talk once again to the reincarnated forms of those I considered precious. And then I noticed the talk among the clan heads…the talk of using their sons and daughters to get connections to the yondaime through his son."

Naruto looked his mother in the eyes while the twins stared back to him. "Are you insinuating that my friends were only-"

"A child from every clan, minus the Uchiha, were friends with the child jinchuriki. As well as a representative of Danzo Shimura, the boy Sai, and a child from the council Woman, Sakura if im remembering right? Being the ex-jinchuriki of the Kyubi left me with an interest ability…the power to sense Negative emotions. And those children were practically _drowning_ in them." She finished with a cruel smile.

"Fear for failing their parent, greed for wanting whatever perks being connected to the yondaime would bring, anger for having to put up with you, and in two certain cases, hate for being stuck with you. All of those emotions were directed towards you…and you were none the wiser. I was the only one that truly cared for you…"

"If so…" muttered Naruto as his eye stopped glowing orange, "…Why did you send me off to the Voidlands? Why did you abandon me?" he spoke out softly. A pleading tone in his voice. The twins looked to their mother as well, eyes pleading for an answer.

Kushina looked into the eyes of her son with a frown on her ruby lips. "I had not planned for that…it would seem that the process of the ascension…affected my thinking processes. Making me believe that you had to earn the love that I had for you…"

Naruto's eyes narrowed at his mother dangerously. There was a rage that was reflected behind them that burned with a great intensity.

"I see…you let your power go to your head. You pathetic deranged woman."

* * *

"Our reports have shown a massive anomaly in the time space continuum," Mister Uzu began from his seated position, "Timelines jumping left and right, stopping and starting…until suddenly, everything ends." He surmised to the gathered CAT members.

Kiba was the first to speak up. "What do you mean everything ends? As in, entire timelines are literally ceasing to exist?"

Mister Uzu shook his head. "I mean, everything ends. Not just this world or the next. Everything ends if this continues. All of existence will cease to be if this is kept up." he said in a grave tone. The seriousness of the issue had already made its way home.

Sasuke grimaced as he took in the information being presented to him, swirling the contents of his still hot cup of coffee. "So whatever is causing this…is erasing worlds and dimensions one by one? Or is this something that will just be the end result of the anomaly running wild?"

"It's…whatever it is its erasing world one at a time. Only problem is that if this keeps up it will cause a chain reaction just from the pure amount of paradoxes that keep piling up. That is what would cause everything to end. Our world is just the final push that will be needed to end it all. It may already be too late to stop it…" Mister Uzu breathed out.

Shikamaru narrowed his eyes in thought while strumming his guitar. "…That is unless we can get the drop on it right?"

Neji smirked at Shikamaru. "Ever the smart one right eh Shika?" the blind drummer then turned to Mister Uzu, "Are we directly in its path or are we just after a pit stop?" the Hyuga asked.

"If my calculations are correct, and they always are, then there will be one stop just before Earthland. A place all of you sans Shika should be very familiar with…me included." Mister Uzu said with a light smile.

Kiba's and the rest of 777 members, sans Shika, eyes widened. "You mean to say that the stop before Earthland is…Edolas?" the cat lover asked.

Mister Uzu nodded his head in confirmation. "We're going to have to drop everything we're doing to prepare for when this…whatever arrives in Edolas. That means that you're going to have to drop your Zeref research Sasuke. Shika, I'm going to give you every bit of info I got on this thing. You know what to do."

The red-haired coffee shop owner then turned to Neji. "Neji, I'm going to need you to figure out a way for our bodies to generate magic in a non-eterano environment. I don't need to stress the urgency of this do I?"

Neji smirked and gave a thumbs-up just as Mister Uzu's phone began to ring. The man ignored the phone in favor of turning to Kiba. "Keep your eyes and ears out on those weird people going about. We need to get more info on these unknowns. Got it?"

"You can count on me buddy. We've known each other since we were kids, been to hell and back and all that. Of course I'll have black mail material by the time of one 'o'clock tomorrow." The cat lover responded with a feral smirk and handwave just as Mister Uzu pulled out his phone.

Flipping it open he had to smirk at the news that was just informed to him via text message. "Guess what boys? Erza scarlet is coming back to life." He said with a smile.

Everyone present smirked at the news. Sasuke spoke up, "So that means we got a week head start on preparing for the anomaly right?"

At that admission, Shikamaru, Neji, and Kiba paled. "Shit," Shikamaru muttered "That means time is about to reset by one week isn't it?"

"Well look on the bright side of things…" Neji chuckled out. Causing both Shikamaru and Kiba to turn their heads to him.

"And what would this bright side be?" questioned Kiba with a glare, to which Neji simply smirked in return.

"It means that because Erza won this month's game, that a powerful reaper has been erased." The blind man explained.

"Huh…kinda makes the vertigo and shit worth it…" Kiba responded.

Mister Uzu then clapped his hands. Drawing the attention to him. He then gave everyone present a salute. "Gentlemen, let us be off. I think we can consider today to be a victory for us…even though we didn't really do anything. We'll meet in two days' time. Until then continue on and carry out your orders. Dismissed!"

* * *

"I'll take this job. I'll look after my half-sister, even if she isn't aware that she has you of all people for a mother. But do not think that this will change anything…six years of happiness and love is nothing compared to a thousand years of pain and fear."

The last thing he saw before time reset itself by one week was his mother's face, as well as his sisters. His mother's face looked content, as if she was happy about the proceedings. While his sisters looked sad, while at the same time angry with him for the things he told their mother.

He honestly could care less.

And with that last memory of them in mind, he awakened from the sensation of vertigo and pain. Waking up in his bed, with a strange golden bracelet around his wrist made of chains.

He knew what it was, it was a binding contract. To signify that he had made a deal. He only uttered one sentence before he went back to sleep.

"My mother is a freaking schizophrenic bitch of woman."

And then he was out like a light.

* * *

 **Incase everyone didn't get it, this all happened after the tower of heaven. Except Erza didn't survive, and died. Whereupon that, she took part in the reapers game to win back her right to life. She won, and now time reset back to when she died, except instead of dying, she wound up in Natsu's arms.**

 **Next chapter we start the story proper, with Naruto joining fairy tail.**

 **So how did ya'll like Kushina? Was she a Bitch? Did you get some of her motives now? Over time there will be scenes that explain Kushina's previous life, and of how she became who she is now. As well as flashback scenes of the Voidlands and how Naruto survived in that place for a thousand years. And yes, that is road to ninja Sasuke, Neji, and Kiba. There is a reason for that as well and I'm sure some people have already figured out why.**

 **Not much action, but really this was more of a set the stage chapter. And yes, Kushina is wearing Kaguya's outfit.**

 **Next time: The Tin Pin Slammer is here!**

 **AND THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE!**

 **CUE THE AIRHORNS!**

 **BABABABWAAAAAAAAAA!**


	4. Enter the Tin Pin Slammer!

**Late by one week. Well at least two chapters for my other stories are almost done…ish. I don't own anything here besides any OC's I introduce, this adorable little puppy, a scouter that I got in my loot crate, and sixty dollars for fire emblem fates.**

 **Also, warning, I don't do cannon. Like ever. Everything I write will eventually diverge off into their own story. This one is no exception. Prepare for an AU ladies and gentleman. Because in an AU I can develop the world.**

* * *

Enter The Tin Pin Slammer!

Naruto Uzumaki sat in his train cart. A week had passed since the reset. A week had passed since Erza Scarlet had come back to life from the Tower of Heaven Event. It was a new day, and due to the time reset caused by the Reaper's, yet another dimensional distortion had been created. That was something that most people were unaware of…but CAT wasn't.

The blonde haired mage was sitting in his train compartment asleep, his face the very visage of calm as his mode of transportation carried him to the town of magnolia. He had a mission to complete in that town, watch over Erza Scarlet: the Titania. And although he didn't want anything to do with the one who gave him his job, his mother, it was either ignore her and let the world fall to chaos, or actually give a damn and possibly change the outcome of things.

Didn't mean he wouldn't do it with clenching teeth and drag his feet through the mud all the way. It was just the way he was. But right now, he was sleeping. Perfectly content, and completely at peace. Nothing could wake him and take him away from his blissful-

"You drool in your sleep."

His eyes snapped open. His right iris exploded into orange as two **Gaster Blasters** appeared from the void and aligned themselves to the sides of his person, jaws open and magic completely charged to fire at the woman at the other end of the compartment.

And then the CAT member realized who his unexpected guess was, and his eyes softened. The orange glow of his right eye died down as his **Gaster Blasters** vanished from the plane of existence they were on and returned to the void.

"Hello Veronica. It's a pleasure to see you again." He spoke with a genuine smile as he crossed his legs and relaxed into his seat. He took the headphones off of his head and settled them down around his neck as he stared into the woman's crimson, and slitted eyes.

Veronica Al'vere was the very picture of beauty. A paragon of what a woman should look like. From the red and white Victorian dress that came down to her stocking covered, high heeled feet, to the golden French braided hair that layed over her shoulder, to the prim and proper seating stance that she sat in as she stared into Naruto's eyes. Around her neck was a silver necklace that had a blood-red crimson ruby impeded into a golden cross. And around her left finger was a ring band made entirely of sapphire the same shade as Naruto's eyes.

Her skin was a pale shade that only served to enhance her ethereal beauty, and her ruby-crimson lips made her something desired by all…but touched by none, save one.

Just remember…hell hath no wrath like a woman scorned. And this woman embodied that idea.

This was a woman that could install the fear of all things primal into Naruto, but at the same time she was a woman that he respected above all, save a few.

Naruto smiled to her as he held out his hand to the woman. "It's nice to see you again mi'lady. A few years give or take…what's the occasion?"

The ethereal woman shook his hand as she returned his smile with a blank face devoid of emotion. "I seek to hire your services. I have a request that I want you to fulfill. It is time you returned the favor you owe me."

Naruto schooled his features as he entered 'Business mode'. His face became blank, his eyes hardened and lost that cheerful glimmer. "So what will it be? A hit? A hostage situation? Do you want me to extort someone? Or is that someone was stupid enough to piss you off?"

With a snap of her fingers, Veronica summoned a small stack of papers. She handed them to Naruto and she pursed her lips.

Naruto raised his eyebrow as he read though the papers. "Quite the track record this fellow has…a serial murderer with a penchant for necrophilia. I also note that he has been exclusively been targeting your folks…seems like this guy pushed all of your buttons as well. If you're going to me of all people you must want him dead…"

A scowl marred the woman's face as she clicked her fingers together. "This hunter…has been targeting the people of my courts. It is one thing to kill some insignificant nobles…but, when you target those that directly share my blood, then you will have your death wish granted."

Naruto turned to the last page of the packet and narrowed his eyes. "This guy's an idiot. Making an open declaration and taking one of your houses family hostage? Guy's a loon that's for sure. Though that does make me wonder…this is old news as far as I can tell. Why haven't you already made a move?"

A sad light entered Veronica's eyes as she tilted her head downward. "We already know that my baby sister is already dead…the family tree told us so a day ago. A minute before we were ready to begin our assault on the scoundrel who did this."

The blonde at the other end of the compartment let his eyes drop a bit as he looked at the slightly shaking form of the powerful woman across from him. He felt the need to hold the woman in an embrace, but refrained from doing so. Veronica was a woman that took the pity from no one. Not even family. She was just like that…well most of her family was like that.

"How soon do you want this guy dead? With CAT's resources at my fingertips I can find this guy quicker than a flash." He said with a grim smile.

Veronica raised her head and stared into Naruto's eyes. Tears that were threatening to fall out were just barely visible. "I don't want him dead…I want him to become my personal toy. I want to hear him scream from what I will do to him…that's why I've come to you. You always manage to deliver…and I want this man alive, kneeling in tears and agony at my feet. Begging for release, to want nothing more than to be released from the confines of mortality…but I will not let him rest." She said with a commanding tone that was characteristic of her noble lineage.

Naruto held out his hand to seal the deal. Mess with any member of CAT and you would have the rest of them on your ass. Mess with an employer and you would wind up missing the next day. Mess with a personally respected and frequent employer…well when CAT is asked to do one of its more shady jobs, they really live up to their boogeyman reputation.

Veronica sent him one of her rare small smiles that sent shivers both up and down his spine as she reached out to shake his hand with hers.

And like that, Naruto Uzumaki had accepted a job from the only SSS rank vampire in the entire world, Veronica Al'vere of house Vlad.

* * *

 **-Cue Ost: Youtube: Character Choices-**

Naruto walked out of the train with his back slung over his shoulder with a smile on his face. The cobblestone tiles clattered beneath his metal plated black leather boots as people passed by him. With a sigh, he began to walk out of the Magnolia train station.

Exiting the station he began to walk the well tiled brick road of Magnolia. Colorful houses and two story buildings of red, yellow, light blue/dark blue, green, and multiple tiles. The towns Riverwalk was a tourist attraction that ran through the entire town of Magnolia that was shaped like a cross, and intersected underneath the large gothic cathedral in the center of the town, Cartha Cathedral.

Naruto walked passed a three story brick building with six windows that was in between two other two-story buildings, their walls practically touching each other. He absently noted that there was someone fighting another person on top of the building. He ignored them; it wasn't any of his business.

The Riverwalk had a small wall to prevent people falling in. Said wall happened to be a small hedge of flowers of different colors that was lined up along the entirety of the Riverwalk. As he ran his hand through the roses and bluebonnets, he saw that across from the river a beastman was turned to stone by brown-haired woman with a rather impressive bust that she wasn't afraid to flaunt.

He noted that Fairy Tail had gotten a much better guildhall in comparison to the old one. He then remembered that they had rebuilt the place after Phantom Lord had taken a sledgehammer to the place. Although that begs the question, why was the courtyard so empty? It was a pretty nice place as well…did it have something to do with all the scuffles he passed by, or all the destruction that was caused by said scuffles?

As he walked into the guildhall, an incredibly spacious space with a wood flooring, a stage, a bar, a second floor with pool tables, and many regular tables on the first floor, he noted that there were a few stone statues of scantily clad women on the stage.

And then he recognized that the stone statues were actual people in Fairy Tail. Mirajane Straus, Bisca Mulan, Levy Mcgarden, Lucy Heartfilia (the rumors surrounding that girl were outrageous!), Juvia Lockheart, and an…elf lady? Didn't know Fairy Tail had one…

And then his eyes noticed the downed form of an old man on the ground with a man he recognized as Gajeel the iron **Dragonslayer** crouching down next to said old man trying to bring him back to consciousness.

"Shit…Makarov." Naruto Cursed as he moved down right next to the incapitated old man.

 **-OST: END-**

Summoning forth his **Pin** magic, Naruto conjured up a soda can and then pressed it to Makarov's lips. Gajeel just looked at Naruto in recognition and watched him force an unconscious old man chug soda. Seconds later, a sputtering and coughing old guildmaster was staring up at Naruto from the ground. The old master let out a chuckle when he saw who it was that helped him.

"Well…in all my years did I expect to see you saving me boy…it's good to see you again brat." he said with a weak chuckle as Gajeel slowly helped him to his feet. To which, Naruto pulled out a cane from his **ReQuip** space and handed it to the old master.

With a frown, Naruto looked upon the worried visage of the old guildmaster. "Old man…what's going on? When I decided to visit the place, finding you on the ground suffering from a heart attack is not what I expected. Where is everybody? I thought that Fairy Tail was a guild consisting of more than two people…and scantily clad female statues."

Gajeel helped Makarov into a chair, to which he sank into slowly and thanked the **Dragonslayer** of steel. With a resigned sigh, he turned back to Naruto, who was leaning against a table with his arms crossed. "It's…my foolish Grandson Laxus." He began, drawing a deep breath before he continued, "He has started a battle royal of the entire guild against him. And to ensure everyone participates, he had Evergreen turn all of the guilds most beloved female members turned to stone…and had Freed set up a barrier to prevent 'old people from getting through."

He then turned his head to Gajeel. "And for some asinine reason, our only available **Dragonslayer** can't get through the barrier. And if you're wondering where Natsu is, because he is one of the guilds S-class mages capable of taking down Laxus, he's out on a job. He was supposed to return today, but got caught up on something during the job…"

The old man then turned his gaze towards the petrified women. "Erza was able to break out of the spell…somehow, and then left to hunt down Evergreen to free the rest of the girls. Said that it would get rid of the hostage situation, leaving Laxus without any bargaining chips."

As soon as those words left his mouth, cracks started popping up on the stone statues. Crinkle, crackle, pop, and the beauties of Fairy Tail were released from their petrification. Although, it would seem that coming out of a petrification spell is incredibly draining on the spell broken. The ladies of Fairy Tail all collapsed to the ground. All but one.

It was the elf. Beautiful blond hair in a braid trailed down her back, with waif-like ocean-blue eyes with somewhat round face, pointed triangle-like pointed ears, and pale skin to finish off the beautiful image of her face. The elf woman was somewhat short, just short of not coming up to Naruto's chin. It was the elf woman's attire that grabbed all the attention from Naruto. She wore a black leather corset that just showed off an impressive amount of pale, ethereal skin. For leggings, the elf wore tight black leather shorts that stopped halfway to her knees. For shoes she had combat stilettos that trailed up her leg to her knees.

The elf woman scowled as she examined her black manicured nails. "Laxus…I'm going to pay that asshole back later..." she then faced her guildmaster. "I take it Evergreen's been knocked out?" she said with a smirk. "It would explain why we've been freed. What about Bixlow and the green asskisser?" she said with a predatory smile.

Makarov fixed his gaze onto the elf woman. "Zelda…Gray and Bixlow K.O'ed each other in their bout, and as far as I know, Freed is still out there, setting up traps with his runes. A shame that he has to follow my foolish grandson in his endeavor…" he trailed off. A sad look in his eyes. A look that showed that he regretted his failures.

"Hey, don't worry pops, if no one can knock some sense into him I'm pretty sure me or my brother could…by the way, where is my little brother? I don't sense him anywhere near here…"

Naruto clapped his hands, bringing the attention to him. "Out on a job. " he said with straight face as he held out his hand to the elf woman, "My names Naruto miss…uh…"

The elf's eyes lit up in recognition when she saw Naruto leaning against a table. "Names' Zelda, Zelda Lefaile. Wasn't it you and the pretty boy that ran into me and my brother during that monster raid a few months ago?" she said while shaking one hand and jabbing his chest with the index finger of her other hand.

Naruto took a step back and began to stroke his recently shaved off beard with a thoughtful expression on his face, before the metaphorical lightbulb ding'd into existence over his head. "You're the chick with the mad bow skills that helped me and Sasuke take down a Succubus coven!" he exclaimed with a smile before leaning back with his hands behind his head.

"So you two joined up with Fairy Tail? Nice. Was wondering what you and your juggernaut brother were up to for a while. You kinda just left my mind for a while ya know?"

He received a smile from the elf woman Zelda in return, "Well we only recently joined. Just before the whole lullaby debacle if you want a timetable. Since then, it's been one crazy incident after another…and a crapton of bar fights."

Naruto nodded towards the elf woman before returning his gaze towards Makarov. "Speaking of crazy incidents…where do you think Laxus is? I may as well beat the crap out of him while I'm in town."

"And where's that green asswipe Freed? I can't go after Laxus now that golden boy here's got dibs on him. May as well vent onto someone else."

An explosion from Cartha Cathedral erupted and drew everyone's attention towards it. Makarov only gave out a sigh as a gust blowed into the guild building, making the man's wizard saint cloak flap in the wind. "My grandson just has to go to the most obvious place in the town…no wonder no one found him. We all thought that he would be in some super-secret underground battle arena."

Naruto stared straight at Makarov as he heard that. Meanwhile, Zelda turned around and began to create an illusion that showed the beauties of Fairy Tail as stone statues, before she began to move the unconscious bodies away from the scene of the crime.

"Are you serious old man? Did you really think that he would be in some underground arena of death?"

Said old fart shrugged his shoulders. "It would be the first time it's happened."

"After how many years since the last time it's happened?"

"About…ten to nine…give or take since I kicked Ivan out. Thought he would return to old roots considering I expected this to be something that Ivan whispered into his head from the shadows."

Naruto still just stared into the wizened wizard's eyes before giving out a forlorn sigh. "Well…may as well go ahead and kick the shit out of Laxus so that stick comes out of his ass. That or beat him till he gets enough brain damage to come back to his common senses."

Makarov levelled a look towards the back of Naruto's retreating form. "Just promise me that you won't hurt him too bad…"

The mage let out a small laugh. "You know my past old man…I don't make promises. But I'll try to hold back for your sake."

Naruto then left he guildhall with Zelda following after him soon enough. Leaving behind a man to feel his age crawling up his spine. "That's all I ask for you to do…now then," he turned his gaze to a frowning Gajeel, who was leaning against a table with his arms crossed, "I need you to do something for me black steel. Something only you can do due to your status among my guild…"

* * *

As it turns out, the reputation Fairy Tail has concerning property damage, was 100% true. And Naruto was seeing the aftermath of the guild in action. Passing by ruined buildings and destroyed carts, stands, and whatever as he made his way towards Cartha Cathedral.

Not even the ground was spared. There were craters among the walkways, roads, and festive areas. ' _And this is the place that's going to be my base of operations for who know how long? I really don't want to be here…and when am I going to get some results on the hunter case? Normally CAT's information archive network is faster than this…_ '

Walking at a brisk pace, he turned the corner and came upon the entrance stairway to the inside of the Cathedral. Coincidentally, a redheaded woman in a very revealing armor that resembled that of a Valkyrie did the same, except it seemed that she was running.

( _Erza's in her heaven's wheel armor)_

For a split second, Naruto could have sworn that he saw her eyes light up when she saw him, but he dismissed it, and opted to instead give out a lazy wave with his hand, "Yo. I'm currently lost on the road to life, can I have some assistance?"

Faster than he thought she would move, Erza appeared in front of him with an aura of authority surrounding her. "No, I am very busy at the moment, do you know where Laxus Dreyer is at the moment?" she answered/demanded.

"Uh…" honestly he was at a loss for words. He kinda expected her to answer him considering that he heard that Erza Scarlet was a courteous person and tended to help out people in need…but he did get the scary bit that people whispered in fear-addled tones. He had an inkling that she was an angry drunk…that would explain a lot.

But even then, he did not expect for her to not even give him a chance to recover and answer. Instead she just slammed her head against his and began running past him while he was on the floor holding his noggin.

 _'_ _For the love of all that is holy and ramen related, she hits just as hard as mom before she went bonkers! Well...at least I don't have to deal with her when I bring Laxus down a peg or two…wonderful, just wonderful. This job is off to a great start. Just look after your baby half-sister! No one said I would have to deal with inter-guild troubles!'_

Shaking his mind from his thoughts, Naruto got up from the ground and turned to the stairway, and began to ascend upwards. All the while whistling a jaunty tune with his hands in his pockets.

* * *

Laxus felt him approach. It was an instinctive feeling he knew considering he was a sensor mage, able to feel the current power of other mages and magical creatures. But he was a different sort of sensor mage…he could sense the color, and 'density' of a person's magic. And the level of power he was sensing was definantly an S-class mage with the potential to reach SS-class…maybe even SSS-class like Zeref did.

The classification system was something that wasn't just limited to Mages. It also reached down to monsters, elven tribes, merfolk, spirits, demons, elder beings, and regular normal people. Rank was never something given out for political reasons…if you had a rank on the system; it meant you earned it through pure power alone.

There were bigger fish than just Zeref and Acnologia, the other dragons, and famous mages. People tended to forget that there were silver Werewolves, ancient Vampires, army-destroying Necromancers, terrifying fiends, nine-tailed kitsune's, Biju that roamed the world, world class assassins, Seraphs, legandary Samurai, almighty goddesses, and one Demi-Fiend. All of that's just the tip of the iceberg. It's a world full of giants, and the mages were but a small part of it all.

All of them were above S-class monsters. SS-class monsters is what they were. The only reason humans could defeat them at first was because they used trickery, and ambushes. SSS-class kitsune's, vampires, and werewolves only every came from certain tribes or families. With very few exceptions. Acnologia himself was a SSSS-class monster, with only a few other dragons and creatures in the world being on par with him. Gogmazios the tar dragon, and the grand Dracula being the only things that he would actually admit to being his equals.

Only thirty percent of all mages ever became S-class. Of that thirty percent, only a select few could hope to advice to SS-class. And of that select amount, only the very best could ever become SSS-class. Zeref is currently the most famous mage in Fiore's history to ever achieve that title. Fiore itself has the lowest amount of S-class mages in the entire world, but had the most SS-class mages that frequented the country as their home…if they ever stop their travels.

Gildharts Clive is among that Number. And unlike his fellow SS-class mages, he actually came from a guild, and stick with that guild.

So when a mage that was three-quarters of the way to Gildharts level of power was walking up the steps of the cathedral, slowly getting closer to him, Laxus began to get just a tinsy bit nervous. If only because he knew that the guy had to be holding back A LOT of power just so that his mere presence and magical aura didn't bring the place crashing down.

So, imagine his shock when he turned around to see a guy with long, spiky blond hair in the most casual outfit possible.

Red sneakers with shoe laces, brown khaki shorts, a yellow T-shirt with 'YOLO' in black capital words, a set of headphones around his neck, and black fingerless gloves around his hands.

Meanwhile Laxus himself was the opposite in terms of fashion. A purple and white stripped button up shirt, a fur coat hanging on his shoulders, black boots, and a set of headphones on his head.

"Heya Laxus! Long time no see sparky! How's it hanging?" he said with a cheerful wave and a goofy grin.

For the life of him, Laxus couldn't come up with a proper response. He began to scratch his head for any clues as to who the guy was.

Let's see here…haven't seen him in the past three years…maybe it's a bit further back?

Not five…deeper?

Okay, maybe ten?

Seriously? Not even ten? Wait, there's something coming…oh yeah!

The blond runt and his posse that were crying a whole lot. Something about a Sakura chick or something like that…and an Ino…a Choji…and a Shino…and a whole lot of other people. it got real annoying, so a challenge against the leader of the group, a kid named Naruto, was made by the **Lightning** Mage.

It was probably the fastest defeat he had ever had. The kid didn't use any magic at all during the fight…he just kept doing brutal and vicious attacks and maneuvers…a lot of them shocked the hell out of the old man when he saw a six-year old child do them.

 **-Cue OST: X gon' give it to ya-**

 ** _"_** ** _Murasame!"_** Laxus was broken from his thoughts as he felt a powerful palm thrust smash into his chin in an uppercut motion, shutting up his open mouth painfully with enough force to send him into the air. With a grunt, Laxus began to channel his magic to zip away like a lightning bolt, only to feel a great pain in his abdomen.

With a cry of **_"Ichimonji!"_** Naruto shoved the magic spear formation that materialized around his hand into Laxus's stomach. The propulsion spell did its thing, and sent Laxus flying backwards into a pillar. The man quickly found his bearings the moment he hit the floor, and began to channel magic around his body.

Naruto fixed a bored glance at the spot Laxus landed at, and snapped his fingers. **_"Distortion."_** He intoned, and sparks of electricity began to zip, crackle, and hiss in the spot Laxus was in. with an alarmed look flashing onto his face, he used his magic to zip-zap away from the radius of the spell, becoming lighting and dancing across around the pillars of the cathedral, and snaking around on the ceiling.

Yellow electricity burst into action, and exploded from the spot from the radius of Naruto's spell, arching around the cathedral and making the air smell of ozone as it chirped and chirped around his ears. With a grim smile, a *click* resounded inside Naruto's head. Without even taking his hands from his pockets, he casted his next spell, **_"Wassup Thunder!"_** he shouted, and the effects were instantaneous.

The leftover lighting from the **_Distortion_** spell suddenly zeroed in on Laxus's lighting form and began to relentlessly pursue him across the entire cathedral, around pillars, up the alter, around the windows, and down from the ceiling. In the end however, Laxus managed to make the lighting impact the ground and disperse, before he made a beeline for Naruto's unprotected back.

Returning to his original form of being a human, Laxus cocked his fist back and shouted out the name of his spell before his lighting covered fist made an impact with the back of Naruto's head. **_"_** ** _Lighting Dragon's crackling fist!"_** he yelled.

Only for Naruto to completely disappear from his spot in front of him, making Laxus stumble a bit before cancelling his technique. "Wha-? How the he-"

A roundhouse kick slammed into the side of his head from the back, sending him flying through a pillar, and slamming spread eagle against the wall. With a pained grunt, he fell to the floor, landing on his knees and panting from exhaustion. With a little effort, he turned his gaze from the ground, and to the form of Naruto, who had his hands in his pockets and his back to Laxus.

 **-OST: END-**

"The **_Teleport Warning_**. Allows me to become both invisible and intangible. Pretty damn useful right? Only in quick bursts though. It's got a bit of a recharge period though. Was considering using the **_Whirlygig Juggle_** instead but decided to be a bit more practical."

A growl escaped Laxus's throat as he got up from his kneeling position. "I remember you. You and your group of whiny brats were in town and the old man decided to help you for no reason."

A condescending smirk found its way onto Naruto's face. "Good! So you do remember! I thought that you completely forgot the ass beating I gave you so long ago."

A snarl escaped Laxus's lips as he glared at the casual dressed man. "Why the hell are you here!? You got no reason to interfere in Fairy Tail business!"

At that, Naruto stopped smiling. The very air became charged with tension as he bored his gaze into that of Laxus's. "How bout' a different question buddy. Here's this…do you think that the most horrible person in the world…can be a good person, if they just tried?"

Laxus was honestly confused with the question. And he was even more confused as to why he decided to actually answer him. "That's hopelessly naive. Only an idiot would believe that."

A chuckle escaped Naruto's lips when he heard Laxus's answer. "Well, let me ask you a different question. _Do you wanna have a bad time?_ Cuz' if you take another step into this fight and don't turn around…you are really not gonna like what happens next." He said with deadly seriousness. A complete turnaround from the cheerful and goofy person that walked into the building.

Laxus gave Naruto a sneer in return and took one step forward. "I may have lost last time, but I'm stronger than before!" with a roar he ripped off his shirt, and showed the world his powerful physique. The fangs of his mouth elongated into canines, and his eyes turned into slits as lighting **Dragonslayer** magic crackled and zapped around him.

"And with this power, I'm going to rip you to shreds!" he roared out. Naruto only sighed before slipping his hands out of his pockets.

"Sorry old man…looks like I'm going to have to rough him up. Shouldn't take long."

In the end, Gajeel and Erza came onto the scene a little late. All that they found was an unconscious, and bloody Laxus slumped into a corner with piece of paper that had an address for a coffee shop tucked into his pocket, and no trace of Naruto in sight.

When Laxus returned to consciousness, he got down on his knees and begged his grandfather, and everyone in the guild for forgiveness. Something to which quite a few were originally reluctant to give, but gave it anyway. It still wasn't enough to stop Laxus from exiling himself from the guild. Leaving it after a tearful farewell hug from his grandfather.

It would be later that night that the festivities of the harvest festival would be underway. And watching it, from the top of Cartha Cathedral, would the blond mage known as Naruto Uzumaki be seated.

* * *

"So what, after beating the shit out of them you tell them your life story and you sympathize with them? That's how your **Therapy** spell works? Sounds lame."

"Well it was originally going to be called the **Therapy Jutsu** but…it's kinda of a different time period and everything. This is the era of magic, not the era of shinobi. We got magic, not Chakra."

A snort. "Remind me again, how did the era of shinobi end? With your mother creating this reality was it?" he said while watching the float that had all the dancing Fairy Tail girls on it: Mira, Lucy, Levy, Cana, and Zelda.

A sigh escaped Naruto's lips. He seemed to be doing that a lot he mused for a second, before pushing that thought away. "It was after she was done ripping out the Kyubi's power and ascending to godhood…or is it reclaiming it in this case? I honestly don't know…" he muttered at the end, making his rooftop companion shoot a curious look at him.

 **-CUE OST: Fogbound Lake extended-**

"Well, it starts off after she killed me, sent me off to the Voidlands, whatever. What she did was that she used her power to literally rewind everything back to the point where her sons died. After that, she took away everything involving chakra, split the world into two. A world that had her and her followers and a world that didn't."

"She favored one world obviously, so she blessed her chosen people. She made these people highly attuned to Nature. These people become the sages of old. Wells of wisdom that people could go to for advice at for any reason, and they would always have something to say, regardless of how petty the reason may be."

"After a couple of years, she decided to try her hand at creating things. And so she started off simple, with plants." He then turned to the third person on the roof standing behind them, and stared at him point blank in the eyes. "Want to know what she made on her first attempt?"

Silence was his answer. Then again, he kinda expected it from the guy. With a shrug he returned his gaze back towards the parade going on.

"She made the life tree Yggdrasil. Yep, that Yggdrasil. And like all trees, it created oxygen for all the pretty little denizens of the planet to breathe in. Except this tree spewed out a special oxygen, one laced with the scatterings of its own power. You two following me so far?"

He received a shrug from his sitting buddy, and silence from tall and stronk.

"Now, let's go back to the sages. It's been a couple hundred years, and the sages descendants have taken their places. Except they've evolved from the sages of old. These guys could literally carry a piece of Nature's essence with them every they go. They had a special little organ that held a small amount of Nature energy. This stuff would go through their bodies every time they breathed, and gradually strengthen them, till they got to the point where they could literally smash mountain into dust with one hand. Pretty damn badass right?"

"Now let's go back to Yggdrasil why don't we? You see, an entire group of people decided that they would make a city around the entire life tree. I mean, no one would dare attack such a sacred object, much less a city surrounding it and dare to risk the wrath of Kushina, the motherfucking Rabbit Goddess right?"

"And it seemed like the sages had the exact same idea to boot! So here we are, a city of a couple thousand regular people, and a few hundred sages. Now let's jump a few…let's say centuries worth of years in time, and practically everyone in the city is either a sage, or a someone who had sex with a sage…so yeah the same thing."

"Now these people have been living as a people connected to nature, and have had constant exposure to the special oxygen of the Yggdrasil tree. As it turns out, these certain special people had obtained special powers. A power that wasn't chakra or anything that Kushina, her wives, and her daughters had seen before. And she was originally going to put a stop to it, but she happened to see a child create an ice golem in the shape of an adorable little bunny and…well I guess she had a nostalgic flashback or something that caused her to rethink things because she literally made it impossible for her to take away this power that humans had obtained. Awfully nice of her right? What do you guys think so far?"

First silence, and then big guy spoke up. "All good things must come to an end…what happened?"

"Ding ding ding ding! Give this man a prize! Yep, disaster struck! You see, as it turns out, Hagoromo and Hamura had a bit of a last laugh moment. You see, their spirits truly believed that their world, the shinobi world, was on its way to peace. So when mother dear goes along and fucks up that world…well it was kinda like she pissed into the bowl of every single one of their favorite brand of cereal. Scratch that, she pissed into the cheerio dispenser at the cheerio factory! And they didn't take kindly to her world warping. Not one bit."

"A manifestation of their will, a parasite named **Black Zestu** was born. Its goal? Corrupt and fuck up everything that Kushina Oostusuki had worked towards in her life. Now let's go back to the people with the special powers. Now one day, they were just minding their own business, when suddenly an army of a bunch of dickwad assholes popped up, and started killing everyone."

"And did they defend themselves? Sorry, they were too pacifistic and set in their ways to fight back. Although a few did flee, and survive the night. The real kicker is that the people in charge of the army were retarded enough to actually _cut down_ the life tree. Which also happened to be mommy dearests favorite plant in her little garden…I guess you two can see where this story goes right?"

The guy sitting down with Naruto let out a whistle as a firework exploded, illuminating his from. A black leather jacket that was unzipped and showed his incredibly toned and ripped bare stomach, and then black pants that ended at his black steel boots that glinted in the lightshow of the fireworks. To top off his look, was the spiky pink hair and the Necklace of an Azure dragon hanging on his neck.

"To say that Kushina was ~pissed~ would be an understatement of the millennia. In her rage to personally tear the army of idiots a new one, she literally created being of grotesque appearances, hunters designed to kill humans, and a whole bunch of other crap. Basically she made all the ancestors of the monsters in this world in her rage. This includes things like dragons, vampires, and mean tree things that whacked the shit out of you. But not demons. Those assholes have been around for a long ass time."

"But when she calmed down after her whole episode, she realized that even the surviving humans with the special powers were succumbing to the creations she made in her rage. And while she wanted to get rid of them so that her people could flourish again, she didn't want to end the lives of her other creations as well. So she took a third path, and created beings that could help out humans. People to be their friends, allies in a time of need. These guys were the elves, dwarves, and other things that are friendly."

"And last but not least, before she returned to her palace in her own special pocket dimension, she decided to give a name to these special humans with powers. She named her chosen people, 'the mages'. And now you know where that little title came from."

"But what about that other world you mentioned at the beginning of this little exposition? The second world that didn't have Kushina's chosen people?"

A chuckle. "Well, isn't it obvious? A world that doesn't have its own magic, forced to survive on its own without the interference of a god…the second world is the one that many if Earthland have called…Edolas."

 **-OST: END-**

Naruto then got up and stretched out. Giving a small yawn as he did so. "Well, now I gotta find someplace to sleep. See ya sparky, and you two mister Apocalypse slayer."

With a grin, he jumped off of Cartha Cathedral and began to find the nearest inn. Leaving the company of Natsu Dragneel, the Dragonslayer of Acnologia, and Laxus Dreyer, the Dragonslayer of Lighting.

* * *

 **I have been busy. A lot. I mean as in, school work busy. Setting up for a birthday kind of busy. Doing projects kind of busy.**

 **So what did ya'll think? This is going to be a rather alternate universe kind of story. Really, the only fairy tail members I'm going to be focusing on are Erza, Gray, Lucy, Natsu, Zelda, and Wendy.**

 **Zelda is an OC of mine that I decided to do…as I was typing this. I was originally going to have Natsu be regular old Natsu…but I decided to scrap that idea. I haven't caught up on Fairy tail since they all reunited after the one year time skip, so don't yell at me to get my ass in gear and catch up on the manga.**

 **Yep, Natsu is the Dragonslayer of the Apocalypse. Acnologia's little death machine. And yep, there are monsters and people tougher than Zeref out there. Gogmazios is actually from Monster Hunter. And I love his design. So, he's in here. And is as tough as motherfucking Acnologia himself, who is tougher than Zeref.**

 **It's a world full of monsters. This fic isn't going to just be focused on Naruto and his family troubles. It's going to focus on things like other worlds (not like kingdom hearts. It's more of in an undertale sense with the multiple timelines), lovecraftian abominations that exist outside of understanding, and a whole lot of other things.**

 **Oh and here's the class ratings for the characters that matter in this story.**

 **Naruto: S-class, halfway to SS.**

 **Mister Uzu: the same as Naruto.**

 **Sasuke: S-class.**

 **Shikamaru: A-class. S-class is too damn troublesome.**

 **Neji: S-class.**

 **Kiba: Delivery boy.**

 **Flowey: SS-class. What? Haven't you seen the things he can do in undertale? Fucking omega flowey…**

 **Kushina Oostusuki: Primidorial. Can not be rated.**

 **Her wives: SSSS-class.**

 **Her daughters: SS to SSS-class.**

 **Aiko: SS-class.**

 **Erza, Gray, Natsu, and Lucy: S-class.**

 **Spoiler character: SSS-class.**

 **ERROR! ERROR!:** WhAt **t** ** _h_** **e F** ** _u_** **c** k **a** _m_ i **_d_** _O_ i ** _ng_** h **E** ** _R_** **e** ** _t_** **H** i ** _s_** Ea _rl_ y **?**

 **Zeref: SSS-class.**

 **Veronica: SSS-class.**

 **Rojang: SS-class…maybe SSS-class in the future?**

 **And that's all the rating I feel like giving at this time and place. Reviews are much appreciated. Can't wait to get to Edolas…that's when things will get really intense.**

 **AND THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE!**

 **CUE THE AIRHORNS!**

 **BABABABW**


	5. The hunt is on! He's gonna Pin ya!

**Lovely day we're having don't you think? I don't any of this shit except the story itself, and the fine print your reading on your device. Long ass authors note at the end for those of you who are interested. Now, on with the show!**

 **The hunt is on, He's gonna Pin ya!**

* * *

 _The final leg of their journey, they had finally the made it to the gateway that would lead them out of this hellish nightmare. Everyone else had already made it to the other side, everyone but the two of them, and the rest that had perished during the journey through the waste lands._

 _Over mountains, through caves they were hunted._

 _Hiding in ravines and watching the shadows fearfully, they mourned the souls they lost._

 _Surrounded on all sides by the vile creatures, the Voidshadows, corrupted spirits twisted to such a point that they were unrecognizable, the two of them held little hope in surviving their predicament._

 _With a smile, she turned to face him, before throwing him over the sea of shadows, sacrificing her very existence for his sake. Holding up the gemstone that guided them up to this point. The Voidshadows, following a simple hive mindset, chased after with single-minded Abaddon._

 _The blond-haired boy cried after the girl with the cherry-blossom hair as she threw herself over the cliff. Taking the Voidshadows with her. Crying her name, the boy was dragged through the gateway by the hands of his surviving comrades. And when they all were on the other side, only then did the boys comrades let themselves shed their tears._

 _Such was the child's pain for the loss of the girl that he swore to never be weak again, to cast off the softness of his own heart. To bear the pain and march onward, to be one who endured. That was the second oath uttered by Naruto Uzumaki._

* * *

With a wave to the innkeepers cute daughter, Naruto exited the inn building, _The Groose Moose_ , and walked back out into the streets of Magnolia. Golden sunlight hitting his face, and making him reflexively block it with his arms until his eyes adjusted.

Opening his eyes, he could see that he was standing on the walkway of the riverway, and across from said riverway was a girl with golden hair and an impressive bust that was walking along the cobblestone street with a…dog thing being squeezed against her chest. Walking by the blonde girls side was a redhead in armor that seemed to be nursing a hangover of sorts.

 _Lucy Heartfilia and Erza scarlet…I ain't got time for any Fairy Tail business. I gotta set up shop soon…but where the hell am I going to find workers to man the place? And I still have yet to get a call back from Mister Uzu regarding the hunter…sigh. This job just got a whole lot more troublesome didn't it?_

With a groan, Naruto began walk in the opposite direction that the two Fairy Tail girls were walking in, and began to search through his pocket. As he walking into a market area, he pulled out his phone, flipped it open, and went through his number book until he got to certain number.

"C'mon, C'mon already. Pick up the damn phone ya red-haired bastard…"

* * *

Holding a beaten up thug by the shirt with one hand, Mister Uzu bored a dismissive glance into the crying thugs eyes even as one of his own was glowing ethereal blue. Bones littered the room, as well as the bodies of the living thugs former gang members.

"Now then…your going to tell me what I want to know, and I want won't male your death as painful as these other idiots were. You got it?"

"F-fuck you man! You killed everyone here! Why the hell would I help a monster like you!?"

The red-haired owner of a coffee shop slammed the crying man into the wall behind him with enough force to make him gag blood and cough it out. "Wrong answer dipshit! Now tell me where the hell the-"

 _"_ _I'm really feeling it! I'm really dealing it! I'm really stealing it! I'm really peeling it! I'm really ree_ _-"_

*flip* *boop*

"Dude, what the fuck? I'm in the middle of something here." Came the exasperated voice of Mister Uzu as he held up his lacrima phone to his ear with his free hand.

" _Buddy, yesterday I asked for any information you could get on the hunter known as 'Hyde'. Where the fuck is the info? We've always got something on somebody! It normally takes a day at the most to get any info on someone! It's one of the things we boast about! It's part of the reason why we get so many clients in the first place!"_

"Dude, calm your tits. Yesterday some bullshit came up and we couldn't find any time to contact you."

" _Really now? What kind of bullshit? Is it the kind like Kiba throwing a bitch fit because his current girlfriend broke up with him? A Yandere stalker of Sasuke's that doesn't know what no means? Having to pay for Neji's hospital bill again because he got the shit beat out of him? Is it because Flowey was making it rain dead bodies again? Or is it because Shikamaru was being a lazy ass once more and shirked off work?_ "

A sigh came from Mister Uzu's lips as he slammed the sobbing man into the wall again, with enough strength to crack the dark, dirty, brick wall. "It's more like massive warping spikes. We called them bullshit energy readings because it was late at night and we were all high on painkillers at the moment. Giant spike of them over at the desert continent."

" _Bullshit energy readi-ow! Lady! I get it okay! Don't cuss when there's children nearby I got it! Anyway…bullshit energy readings? The desert continent was always one giant source of_ _ **Flux**_ _and interdimensional activity. Probably due to all the extremely powerful monsters that litter that place."_

"Yeah. It was like someone warped an entire area into another plane of existence. It was freaking weird."

 _"_ _Hmmm…have Shika look into it at a later time. Right now I want that info you got on Hyde. We be getting paid big bucks for this one, and I personally made it an oath to never leave a customer unsatisfied._ "

"The most basic stuff? Dude went rouge. Killed a fellow guild member, jumped ship, and started targeting vampires specifically. Was pretty good as a hunter, killed a Jhen Moran on his own."

" _Like that's anything new. Now, if he ended up killing a Andu Wyvern while naked? That would be something else. What else you got?_ "

"Nothing much else to say. I'm not the one who dug all that stuff up, just stuff I heard in passing. Neji was the one who got most of the info from his inside buddy, and then he told the rest to Flowey and Shika."

" _Gah…nothing else much to do then…send Flowey my way when you get the chance. Designated meeting point, in like…six hours. I'm going to try and set up a branch for 36 in Magnolia. Gotta find workers for the place first though…"_

"I'll leave you to that then. Toodles!"

And like that, Mister Uzu hanged up without giving Naruto a chance to respond. Turning his gaze back the now quiet thug, he let a yawn escape his lips. "Tormenting the shit out of you guy's was fine while it lasted. But now thanks to that call, all the funs gone. I already knew where the stolen jewel was so…bye."

And then he tilted his neck to the left, revealing a **Gaster Blaster** with a gaping maw, and a charging ball of magical energy situated in said maw. And like that, the blaster let loose and completely destroyed the wall, and the thug, with a large lazer beam.

* * *

"I'm almost saddened by this place…but where people see adversity, I see opportunity." Spoke Naruto as he stared at the decrepit and abandoned shack that was in the middle of the market area. Right next to a place that was simply named 'Heart Cruz' and another that was named 'Criminal'. Both seemed to be clothing stores…that had a rivalry of sorts between each other.

Clasping his checkerboard themed fedora, so that it shadowed his eyes, Naruto walked into the abandoned two story building while folding down his phone, and pocketing it. He then began to inspect the insides of the building, starting with the center pillar in the dirty room.

"Hmm…so far, it has a stable foundation…windows need to be replaced though." He remarked dryly while looking at the two broken windows out near the front door. Said door had a small concrete staircase of five layers that lead up to it.

"Yeah that could work…replace the front two walls with glass walls, and then replace the moldy wooden door with a revolving glass tri-door. Yeah…that would look nice." He said while stroking his growing beard. It was merely a few stumble hairs at the moment, but give it time and by god it would grow to be glorious.

He then took a look around the flat square room, absently noting the dust that was everywhere, and the ripped apart cords that were here and there. "Put the counter here…" he said while gesturing to the center of the room, "And make it kinda split the place as well. Make it a bit of U shape, but having right angles along the counter walls instead of the curvy shit Mister Uzu does."

Holding up his fingers, and imaging how the place would look in his mind's eye. "And then put a wall in the middle of the space between the side walls and the side of the counter…and put the booths on the outside part of said wall. Making the inside part a walkway…a polished wooden walkway. The outside part would be rugs with a few comfy chairs spread here and there…" he muttered.

He then turned around, and began to walk up the stairs, opening the door and Immedianlty scowling at what he saw.

"Yeah…this is too damn small to be an area for people to relax and chill. There is no way I can make this a halfway second floor, and half balcony thing like I wanted. This place is going to be where I sleep and stay at night. My humble headquarters if I do say so myself." He snarked as he stared at the disgusting sight before him.

The wooden walls were moldy, there were rats scurrying about the place as they tried to flee from the human giant. Many wooden planks were uprooted, and rat shit was everywhere on the floor. There was also a decomposing human corpse on the floor. Rotting away into oblivion.

Apparently someone decided to commit a murder and hid the body here. He would have to fix that…well, rather his assistants would.

Summoning forth three pins from his **Re-quip** space, he brought out three pins with a fox-mask design on the front. Throwing them into the air, the pins were engulfed in light, and became exact replicas of the fox-masked maids from his train ride that was hijacked by his mother.

The three of them kneeled before him, heads bowed as they got onto one knee. He turned his gaze to they're lowered heads with a small glance. "I want this place cleaned up before I get back. There is someone I want to track down at the moment before I start to call in a few favors to get this place cleaned up. After the place is sufficiently dusted up, I want you three to stand guard around the place in case anyone tries to stake a claim to it."

And with that he turned around and began to walk out of the abandoned building, idly noting that the three maid creatures had conjured up cleaning instruments as he shuffled his hands into his pockets.

 _Noise can be used for so much more than simply just killing people. But I never really thought to use them like this until I saw mothe…Kushina do it. The tests came back successful two days ago…this is their first use in the field. And I really hope that they do a good job…it would be a shame to have to scrap this project just because we're pressed for time._

And like that, he was outside again, blocking the afternoon sunlight with his arm as he slowly adjusted to the bright light. With a deep breath he began to hone in on that feeling of power that he sensed during his phone conversation with Mister Uzu.

It was a familiar energy signature that he had felt before. One he had felt almost regularly for a time…

It was a power he felt for the first six years of his life. An energy that he himself once wielded.

It was chakra.

And he wanted to know just who had beyond Kage levels…no scratch that, just who had a bottomless well of Chakra besides his moth-Kushina!

…it couldn't be one of them could it?

One of his siblings? Or is it one of Kushina's wives…would that make them his Step-Mothers?

God that is just downright weird.

Shaking these thoughts from his head, Naruto began to make his way towards Kartha Cathedral, the place he beat down Laxus, and the source of the energy signature.

* * *

 _The world is a large place. People easily forget this fact quite often. A sad reality this is because Earthland is a large, and vast world. Filled with many different people, cultures, and lands. But sadly, it is also a divided world. Between the hunters, and the mages._

 _On one end of the world, there is the Altesia Continent. A super-continent is a more accurate term in this case. It holds half of the world's landmass by itself, and it is where almost all hunters call home. On the other side of the world there is a joint collision of five continents._

 _The water continent. The headquarters of the mage association. A land filled with vast rivers, and beautiful cities, breathtaking landscapes, and some of the most talented mages in all the world. The Mages association is an organization that monitors, and researches all fields of magic and its various effects, as well as the activities of the worlds various mages._

 _The wind continent, otherwise known as the healing land. It is the place that boasts the greatest white mages to ever grace the land. And it can back up these sayings as well. Even the land itself seems to want to ease the pain of others. Many people would claim that just breathing in the wind and fresh air that would cascade over hills and through the forest leaves would make them feel better._

 _However, the bedside manner of the continents mages leaves much to be desired. Especially from the divine healer, the greatest white mage in the entire continent. There is one rule that all obey when they set foot on the continent._

 _Don't fuck with the white mage._

 _If you're a treasure hunter and seeking glory, then the grass continent is the place for you to go. Home of the explorers association, they are the treasure hunter mages. Dedicating their lives to the search of new lands, unknown territory, fabled myths, and the glory of gold and jewelry. The land itself is not as mountainous and water ridden as the wind and water continents respectively, but the continent itself is mostly covered in beautiful forestry._

 _The desert continent, home of some of the most dangerous monsters outside of Altesia. A place that is home to a unique brand of mages that are more akin to beast tamers. A hardy and powerful lot, those that walk the walk the desert are known for their tan skin, ability so survive in incredibly harsh conditions, and their vast talents that make them integral to the collision of between the five continents._

 _The people of the desert continent are tied closely to nature, it is the home to many sages that journey the lands. Desert seers are famous for their prophetic abilities, and the shamans of the desert are revered for their ability to befriend monsters._

 _And finally, the Frozen continent. A place of great beauty. From the cities made from ice and ice alone, to the crystal clear lakes and ocean-blue rivers, to the mountains that reach high above the clouds. It is known as the continent of Beauty for a reason. It is the birthplace of the make-mages, mages with the ability to craft anything from a specific element._

 _The people are an easy going lot that are laid back and very intelligent. Instead of applying their skills to combat, a great majority dedicate their time to the art of crafting various items. From vases, to swords, to jewelry, to homes, to other weapons, and to different magical trinkets._

 _These five continents: Water, Wind, Grass, Desert, and Frozen are what make up the Mages Association. An organization that monitors all magical activity in the world, and constantly seeks to learn more about it. These five continents constantly trade with one another, sending goods to and fro back and forth, as well as towards the other continents to a limited degree._

 _In-between these two continents, one super, the other a united front, are four other continents. The Calum Empire, Fiore, the Frontier, and the Ballan Gate. The Empire and the Ballan Gate are their respective sides army base. With the Calum Empire boasting an incredibly powerful army of mages, and the Ballan Gate housing its own army that used many different tools and contraptions._

 _Mages and Hunters. The two superpowers of the world. With Fiore and the Frontier being right smack in the middle of them._

 _However, there are more than just those nine continents that make the world. Legends and myth speak of entire cities, and even a super-continent that floats in the sky. Protected by a never-ending storm that drives everyone away. Rumors speak of underwater cities, protected by great magic barriers that let no water in._

 _This is the world of Earthland, the world of this story._

* * *

The moment he set finished stepping up the final step of the staircase, he knew just who it was that was the owner of the chakra signature. Finally stepping back into the church after the whole Fairy Tail fiasco from the day before, he knew who it was that stood with on the alter with their back facing him.

It would seem that Laxus did some redecorating before he arrived yesterday. There were now pews and benches throughout the area. The cracks and ruined parts of the cathedral that resulted from Laxus's therapy were now gone, most likely fixed with magic. The glass windows depicting his mother and her three wives caring out the acts they did throughout history decorated the ceiling window, the eight side windows, and the giant glass depiction of Kushina looking up towards the moon behind the alter.

He noticed the cloaked figures that were standing around the pillars in the area. Black cloaks that obscured every bit of detail of them he could make out, with their hoods shadowing their faces. He sent a narrowed gaze to the back of the figure on the alter. No way was he going to walk into that, being surrounded by unknown enemies of unknown strength was the most stupid move anyone could do. And it would seem that the figure standing at the alter knew that too.

"Leave us." She spoke, her voice both calming, and commanding. The moment she said those words, all but one of the seven cloaked figures left in various teleportation techniques. From fire, to lightning, to a simple flash and they were all gone. All except this one figure that when Naruto looked at, all he could see were the crimson and black starburst eyes.

And then she too disappeared. With her own unique variation involving the very fabric of reality warping around her, and taking her somewhere else. Taking a deep breath, and exhaling, Naruto began to walk towards the alter.

"You know, your name is kinda ironic in the language of Edolas. Back there, it means 'one who serves'. And here you are, commanding your own unit. Life's funny like that isn't it?" he told the lady at the altar. Mikoto Oostusuki was wearing a backless, strapless black dress that came down to her high-heeled ankles, with her beautiful ebony black hair flowing down her back as she stared at the glass depiction of Kushina's wrath against those who dared to cut down Yggdrasil.

"And it's ironic that a boy who once wanted nothing more but to spend every day in the protective arms of his mother, having his hand held for _everything,_ would turn into a man who detests that very same woman." She responded without turning around. Running her hand across the stone pillar beside her without even turning around.

"Can you really blame me?" he asked while cracking his knuckles, "Because its kinda hard to forget just what she did ya know? The difference between the woman I remember and the woman she is now is absolutely staggering isn't it?" he said while running his hand over the polished wood belonging to one of the benches.

"…If you knew everything about your mother at the time, as well as her reasons for doing so then you might have understood what was happening. She's lived a hard life, both times. The only people who have suffered more than her are you and that strange group of yours."

"Doesn't change things a bit. She still did what she did. And time may heal all wounds, but that one is still fresh in my mind. If her life was just as bad as mine was, then tell me, just what the hell was going through her mind? Tell me her justification for her sins. I want to know how she can sleep at night knowing what she did." He said while standing in front of the alter, his voicing echoing off the walls of the cathedral.

Mikoto then turned around, fixing her pentagram eyes onto Naruto's apathetic blue ones. A small smile on her lips. "It is not my place. Kushina dug her own hole, now she has to climb back out of it." She spoke, while fixing her eyes onto one of the statues of Kushina that were off to the sides.

Naruto then snorted while folding his arms. "I think I'm starting to remember why you're my favorite godmother. Never understood why she made me have three, but hey, I was a child loved by all and spoiled by some of the most desired people in Konoha."

Mikoto frowned for but a small second, before snapping her fingers, and the two were teleported off to somewhere else in a flash of white light.

When Naruto could open his eyes again, he took stock of his surroundings, and realized that he was sitting down in a really comfy recliner chair, in the same train room as the time with Kushina. Sitting across from him was Mikoto, sipping on a cup of tea. Standing by her side were two of the cloaked people from before, and the same applied to him as well.

He absently noted that the same person with the strange starburst eyes was by Mikoto's side as well. Looking to the side, and out the window, he realized just where the train was.

"Mikoto…is this a flying train? Cuz' I'm pretty sure that I'm seeing clouds outside of this compartment." He deadpanned while accepting the cup of steaming tea from the cloaked figure to his left. Mikoto simply looked at him with an amused smile on her lips. "Why yes, we are flying. This is the Starlight Express after all. Is it truly that surprising, considering what I am?"

Naruto sent her a dry look as he blew on his tea. "Last I checked, there ain't any train tracks in the sky…yet, as far as I'm aware." Taking a sip of his drink, and slouching into the seat while crossing his legs, Naruto then stared into Mikoto's rather hypnotic eyes with boredom. "Now then, what's the point of this meeting? I'm pretty sure this isn't a social visit if you wanted me to come to you."

Mikoto chuckled as she settled into a relaxed seating arrangement, with her hands folded into her lap and one leg crossed over another. "You're right. Your mother wanted me to deliver some clothes to you. garments that befit your station as the only mortal son of the almighty Goddess of this world." She said while snapping her fingers, making a white flash of light appear, disappear, and leave behind a set of incredibly formal clothes. A beautifully woven silver-white Kimono and ceremonial leggings to go along with them. There was one thing however, a tiny detail about the design of these clothes…

Naruto took one look at them and scowled. "Pavo real? Ain't no way in hell am I wearing expensive shit like that. I'm more into the _Jupiter of a monkey_ brand of clothing." He said while throwing them towards the cloaked one with the starburst eyes.

With a handwave, Mikoto stopped the projectile in dead in its tracks, and with another wave they unfurled clothes fixed themselves into a neat stack, before floating down onto the table in the middle of the room. "Personally, I'm more attuned to _Dragon Culture_ than Kushina's thing for _Pavo Real_ and Tsume's passion for _WildBoar_. Would you believe it that Hamura's into _d+b_? kinda shocking isn't it?"

Naruto ended up doing a spit-take at that admission. He turned to his left, and spat out the tea in his mouth onto the face of the cloaked person to his left. "Mama-Hamura? Wearing skimpy leather? The same woman that made me wear those stuffy Kimono's and took pictures of my humiliation?" he asked incrediusly. "I just can't see it…" he muttered while sinking into the chair he was sitting in.

With a narrowed eye, he glared up to Mikoto before sitting up in his chair. "You're making me comfortable…easing my tension…sorry, but I'm done reveling in the past. Tell me, why should I wear these clothes? Why should I give Kushina a better image? What has she ever done for me that has helped me out in the past millennia?" he asked harshly with a cold gleam in his eyes.

Mikoto almost flinched at the tone the boy…no, family member before her addressed his own mother with. Key word being almost, Mikoto had seen Kushina address her subjects with a much harsher and a lot colder tone. But the distaste was clearly there, and it was delivered much in the same vein as Kushina would. Like mother like son Mikoto mused…

Setting her teacup down onto the small plate in her hands, and then setting that down onto the glass table between the two of them, she put a red manicured finger onto her chin while looking straight into her godson turned Step-Sons bright, electric blue eyes that once glowed…but now radiated frost and confidence. "That venom in your voice…it is unbecoming of you Naruto." She chided, to which Naruto snorted and took another sip of his tea. And then found this small cup was empty. To which he simply raised it off to the side, and it was Immedianlty refilled by one of the cloaked individuals.

With a sigh, Mikoto looked back into those blue orbs that brought back so many happy memories of another time. "If you must know…your mother did give you something the moment you reemerged back into this world." She spoke, getting a raised eyebrow from Naruto. "It was blessing that was set to fall onto your shoulders the moment your spirit returned to this world. It was Kushina's blessing, the touch of lady luck herself."

Naruto only looked at her with a confused expression. "I'm not exactly the luckiest person in the world…so she blessed me with luck? She always did have a thing for irony…but sadly, I'm pretty sure that it ain't working. You see, I'm not exactly 'feeling' lucky." He explained with his arms open wide. To which, Mikoto simply sent him s dry look as she took another sip from her teacup.

"It does not make you 'lucky' as you put it. It simply make sit so that the chance for the outcome you desire to happen is proportional to the 'randomness' factor of the given situation." She explained with a raised finger. To which Naruto looked at he like she grew a second head. Prompting Mikoto to pinch the bridge of her nose.

 _I completely forgot…he's just like Kushina was before she remembered everything. Theoretical flies over his head, and he only understands it in layman's terms._

"So…what your saying is that depending on just how random something is, the more likely I hit the jackpot? If it was something like dice, the more dice is thrown into the mix, the more likely I get what I want?" he asked with an inquisitive gleam in his eye. Making Mikoto look at him with surprise.

 _…_ _but it would seem that he is more like his father than when he was a kid. Kushina is probably going to hate that considering her distaste for Minato and the fact that 'he' looks so much like him…_

"Why…yes, that is absolutely right. I was going to go for the slot machine explanation but that works too I guess…" she said while staring at the rather unsettling smirk on Naruto's face. "Well…" he began while rubbing his hands together, "It seems that I have discovered another way to fund CAT's operations now…"

Mikoto then looked to the side and stared at the cloaked, starburst eyed individual by her side. The cloaked figure simply shaked her head while Mikoto sighed and drank her tea, and having her attention Immedianlty brought back to the fold by Naruto clapping his hands together. "Now, while that's all fine and dandy, I think I have a better proposition that yours Mama-Mikoto. Would you like to hear it?"

Mikoto looked at Naruto oddly for a second before smiling. "Your mother does the same." With that remark wiping the smile off his face, Naruto stared at Mikoto with a furrowed brow. "My mother does what? Get rid of old habits? Like the whole 'endearing' Dattebayo thing?" he asked evenly. To which Mikoto simply clapped her hands together and smiled to Naruto.

"That." Another clap. "Bringing the attention back to you. she always claps her hands together to get everyone's attention when she wants it. It seems that despite your differences…you still share many things don't you? I bet that you still devour bowl after bowl of ramen on a weekly basis…and you probably still love pranking people don't you? You two really are mother and son…"

Naruto scowled at Mikoto before schooling his features. "Be that as it may, despite my…similarities with my…mother…we do not have such a bond. The only thing that connects me to her is a red string of **blood**. Nothing more, and nothing less. If I could be rid of such a bond, I would sever the infernal thing in a heartbeat. But, sadly…there is no such method to do so. Not even magic can sever that string of blood between me and her…"

Mikoto only frowned at Naruto while the starburst eyed, cloaked figure beside her narrowed her gaze towards him. "Can you…at least try to mend the bond between the two of you? At least tolerate her to a degree? I know your relationship with each other is one built upon resentment…but Kushina doesn't really know how to go about with treating you at the moment…can you at least give her a chance?"

Naruto fixed his cold blue eyes onto Mikoto's while clenching and unclenching his head, as if crushing an imaginary stress ball. "Can I give her a chance? To create a bond that both sides have to be willing to uphold?" he asked while holding up his hand, showcasing the golden chain that orbited his wrist. "Does this look like something that inspires me to give chances? She forced me into this…if I fail her mission, then the toll will be exacted. And you and I both know the price of failure…but this does Segway into that proposition I was talking about…"

"…I want you to work at my coffee shop." He said with a straight face while sipping from a cup of tea. The reactions were immediate as the cloaked figures standing guard around them tripped over themselves. Oddly enough, Mikoto kept a completely straight face while asking the simple question, "Why?"

"It's quite simple really, I'm opening a coffee shop…actually, make it a bar. There are like five different coffee places in Magnolia and not one goddamn bar, I don't like having competition, so I'm going to open Magnolia's first bar. And I want to hire some people. But then I started thinking, 'The only people I can really trust to man the place are my fellow CAT members and my extended contacts'. That's when I thought of something when I ran into you…"

He then sat his cup of tea down and looked at her in the eyes. "I know that the rest of the…family…odd saying that now…have now become aware of my presence, and are no doubt, very curious of me. I'm pretty sure that most of them would probably inherit the Uzumaki temper and that they would become pissed with me very quickly…so what better way to get to know them better than to work side by side with the one person that everyone no doubt gets along with very well?"

He then clapped his hands together. "You're all goddess's, why would you bother with caring about a mortal organization that mostly involves dimensional investigation and whatnot? Sure, it's pretty interesting and everything, but it doesn't fit into the grand scheme of things correct? So that's why I think it's pretty safe to ask you this, would you like to work at my bar? Ya know, bond over time and shit? Isn't that what you want Mikoto?"

Mikoto simply looked at Naruto with an expression of pure disbelief. "…You know what? Sure. But only on one condition…" she said with a sigh. To which, Naruto simply leaned forward, eyes lit with curious intent.

* * *

Walking into a slightly dark and dank alleyway, Naruto refrained from bashing his head on the wall. The sun was setting onto the other end of the sky, bathing the world in a tranquil orange, signifying that the end of the day was almost nigh. Despite the fact that it was in full swing of the winter season, the temperature of the week was not acting like it.

That's Fiore weather for you. Make it cold in the summer, and warm in the winter. Nature's funny like that. However Fiore was known for having strange weather among other things. It was a hotbed for magical activity, regardless of affiliation. Odd weather patterns were just part of Fiore's charm in the minds of its denizens. But it simply had more to do with the continents placement in the world.

Eventually Naruto came to a small round clearing, were the sun was shining down on a patch of flowers. In the middle of the small pile was a simple Flower that towered above the rest, except this flower had a face on it. Two black eyes and a disapproving frown marred the Flowers face. When it turned to see Naruto, its frown turned into a full out glare.

"Well, things are certain to get interesting now…roped a goddess into working for your bar have you? But will it be worth it hmm?" Flowey spoke while tilting his stem upwards a bit, shaking the leaves so that they would be more spread out.

"I did what I had to do to get the chance to learn just who Kushina pissed off. She has made enemies of different gods of different dimensions and worlds. Mikoto can be our ticket to knowing just who she angered, why she did so, and how to best prepare in case they invade." Naruto replied with a glare just as frosty. "But in a personal level, I don't think that the price Mikoto asked for is worth it."

"How do you even intend to make her give up such information? If you even approach her about it in the most subtle of manners she's going to know…trust me, I've tried more than my fair share of times. It got real annoying before she even spilled anything to me, and she left after that your employment in all of those attempts…you would not believe the amount of times I've had to reset in the meantime. I missed this meeting you know, you can add that to counter as well..."

Naruto simply walked over to the left wall of the clearing and leaned against the wall with his hands in his pockets. "Mikoto is a lightweight when it comes to drinking." He said with a passive face, "She may be a god, but there are wines and spirits that can make even something like Acnologia drunk, if what Natsu said is to be believed. I simply have to get my hands on some of these and 'chat' her up while slipping her some of the stuff. A bar is a perfectly logical place to have something like that stored in case of someone like Cana or Gildharts popping up right?"

Flowey simply smirked at Naruto while his roots slowly rose from the ground and began to snake their way towards an unsuspecting pigeon. "But do you really intend to hold up your end of the bargain? If you want, I could make it so that you never made that deal in the first place…" he whispered sinisterly with a malicious smile on his face.

Naruto's response was to simply cross his arms and stare into the orange skyline as the birds flew up in it. "No, I will not have you go back and change things. She made me promise…and an Uzumaki always fulfills their promises…even if we do pull a genie and find out a loophole to royally screw the person we made the promise to. It's what I'm going to try and do that's for sure."

Flowey only smiled evilly to Naruto as the young man let out a small sigh. "Well, at least it's better than the binding contract Kushina forced on you. Maybe I should start taking lessons from her…she certainly is depraved enough if she forced her very own flesh and blood into a contract that will kill him if he fails to uphold it…and torture him for three months if he breaks it." The flower whispered with a sickly and horrifying grin on its face.

Naruto scowled at the evil Flower as he clenched his fists. "I did not come here to talk about a woman who is tied to me by blood, and only by blood Flowey. I need the information on the Rouge Hunter Hyde. Tell me what you gathered." He commanded with frost and venom in his voice.

Flowey's roots that had been slowly, and meticulously, climbing the wall behind him lashed forward, and snatched the unsuspecting bird before it could get away. Grasping it with an unbreakable hold, and then slowly squeezing the life out of it. With a pop, a splotch of blood rained down around Flowey. "Is someone having mommy troubles?" the Flower taunted, "Will there be a tearful reunion involving a lot of crying…and you dead on the floor?" the malicious Flower giggled out.

"Flowey! I am warning you…" Naruto barked to the laughing Flower. Said Flower Immedianlty straightened itself and stared Naruto dead in the eye. "You're no fun you know that? But I Guess that's why you keep me around..." he said with his trademark evil smile. Naruto only glared at the Flower in turn for his remarks.

"Fine…just be killjoy…the Rouge Hunter Hyde once bared witness to his family being ripped apart by monsters when he was only six years old. The experience, instead of traumatizing him, pushed him onwards to becoming a powerful and respected Hunter. According to his peers, he has a great charismatic spirit, and a strong drive to protect his fellow Hunters. However, he detests mages…well detests would be too weak a word…"

A dark smile pervaded the Flower's face as his eyes became shadowed by his vines rising into the air. "He is often described as being a wraith…not the battle kind, but a vengeful spirit cloaked in darkness, and spurned onwards by hatred…said hate happens to be directed towards mages and monsters respectively…funny that."

"It would seem that he found out that his parents killers were vampires, and promptly requested to hunt down the family that killed them. Said request was denied on the grounds that the family were too well respected in both mage society, and certain parts of the Hunter continent as well. He didn't exactly take that well didn't he?"

Naruto snorted as he popped the bones in his neck. "No shit Sherlock. We wouldn't be here if that wasn't the case." He snarked with sarcasm heavily lacing his tone of voice.

"Don't you just love reality?" the Flower rebounded with a smile on its face, its roots now dragging a bird carcass with it down into the earth. "Well, a certain problem lies in the fact that Hyde was a rather well-respected Hunter, and had garnered his own pack if you will…and said pack ended up deserting with him. You remember that case a year ago about the serial murders going on in the water continent? Well apparently this little group of eleven…I mean, ten Hunters was responsible for that."

Naruto stroked his non-existent beard with his left hand while the other ran its fingers over a black round marble in his jacket pocket. "The case of the drowning innocents if I recall…" he whispered, "Thirty—six dead before the bastard was caught. By the time they had managed to bring him down, he ended up dying from his wounds before any of the healers would do anything…the bastard always drowned his victims, and those victims were always mages. I think the guy thought that drowning mages in the water continent was funny? You never know with the minds of criminals…"

Flowey smiled to Naruto while waving around in the sunlight. "Yep, and you're dealing with ten of them. Think that you can take out nine+- Hunters of at least A-class caliber, and a leader that's at least low S-class? Think you're up to something like that?"

Naruto didn't answer him; he only stared into the sky as the sunlight slowly began to edge away from the clearing. "…What else did you find out about Hyde and his group? What can you tell me about his skills, what tools and weapons he uses? Anything about his entourage? I need statistics now." The blond haired **Pin** mage questioned.

"I left all that stuff on your desk at your new place. In fact, I left everything I found out about Hyde and his pow-wow group on that desk. I believe I have filled out my part in this, and I have frankly more entertaining things to do…if you will excuse me…"

And like that, the Flower monster sank into the ground, his intentions and objectives unknown. Leaving Naruto to have only one singular thought in his mind.

 _…_ _I have a new desk? Since when?_

* * *

 **Omake: Party hard: part one: the invitation.**

"Bill, bill, junk mail, porn mag, fine, ticket, bill, cat magazine, court summons, bill, invitation, Murder charge, bill, love letter number 756, bill, florist monthly, bill, Aaaaaand Lootcrate. That's all the mail. What do you wanna go through first Naruto?"

Taking a sip from the mug that had the number 36 emblazed on its front, Naruto walked behind the counter of the coffee shop with a nonchalant air about him. "I'll read out what the invitations for, hand it here. By the way, what's this month's Lootcrate theme Mister Uzu?"

Sliding the invitation over the counter, Mister Uzu began to organize everyone's mail into separate piles. "I think its Zombies buddy. Been a while since I got the letter telling me it. Heh, want to shove all the bills and the court summons into Shika's box?"

Chuckling at the redheads dick move, he began to open the letter, and promptly froze up. Making Mister Uzu quirk an eyebrow when he looked behind him and saw his friends still form. "Hey man, what's up? It can't be something like an invitation to the princess's birthday party can it?"

Snapping back to reality, Naruto looked at Mister Uzu in the eye before reading the letter out loud.

 _Dear fellow Uzumaki, you are hereby invited to the annual Uzumaki family gathering. There will be beer, alcohol, and explosions galore. This letter was brought to you by the dimensional seal matrix that is created out of the characters in this letter. We humbly await your arrival for the party that will be held at the Konoha Senju compound at 7:00 PM sharp, in ten days' time. Have a good day._

Mister Uzu looked at Naruto with blank face. "Dude, the fuck. Is this shit legit?"

To which, Naruto replied with, "Dude, I'm an Uzumaki. I know Uzumaki seals when I look at them; it's literally in my blood. This dude, chick, whatever, literally made a seal that would make this letter go out to an Uzumaki in another world…which means there will be more otherworld Uzamaki's there as well. I think I can trace where this came from if you give me a bit of time." He said with a smirk on his face.

Mister Uzu then went back to organizing everyone's mail, putting Kiba's cat magazine in place of Neji's porn mag and vice-versa. "Whoever this feller is has to be an absolute genius. Just tread carefully; Flux is always unpredictable when you traverse it."

"Oh hey, it says here we can bring up to three guests and a date."

"Thinking of grabbing someone? Neji is still out on a job and I'm definantly in, Sasuke will want in as well…and Kiba's a party guy. And I'm pretty sure Shika will just see the thing as too troublesome."

"I'm thinking of grabbing Erza. Heard she's a party girl, that and she's got a shade of hair worthy of that of an Uzumaki."

"…You do realize that neither of you have had a single meaningful conversation with each other right?"

"That's what roofies are for."

And then Flowey's head popped out of his flower pot by the window seal. "You're going to hell, you know that?" he said with an evil smirk.

Naruto simply sent the potted flower a dry gaze. "I thought you were out seducing roses?"

"Those sluts? Please. I was out chasing daisy's. But they were right next to some dandy lions. Freaking sperm smearers…"

Mister Uzu raised when eyebrow and looked at Naruto straight in the eye. "I'm not even going to ask. Now, where do you think I should put the murder charge and the ticket?"

* * *

 **Happy spring break people. This…took two weeks. I constantly rewrote scenes, and took down things I didn't like, and adjusted the plans for some of my other stories. That's why they really haven't been updated in like a month or two. Well, that and school, and pure laziness. I'm going to try and get the next black flames chapter out during the weekend, as well as the Heart of a digimon chapter that's been pending for a good month and a half. And you people may end up seeing a side story to this one called the CAT files, basically a collection of one-shots centered around the CAT members and other people in this story. Goddess's son is focusing on the story of Naruto Uzumaki, the Pin mage. So the main focus is going to be on him.**

 **Anyway, do people think I'm writing a good Flowey? He's a lot of fun to write, but at the same time I constantly think I'm doing his character wrong. In the background, he's pretty much been this character that just hangs back and backs humorous jabs at other characters. This time, I tried to write him off as what he is, a monster. Both in heart, and body, and if you forget that he will remind you that evil is not a toy.**

 **I thank all you people who enjoy reading my stories, feedback is much obliged, and your criticisms that point out flaws in my writing and character development, and pointers that can help in any way are very much appreciated. I know I'm not the best writer, and that I don't always deliver, but I do give my damndest, and I hope its enough.**

 **That said there is a shitton of stupid people on this site. I tend to leave incredibly spiteful, and verbal beatdown reviews on those. If people are going to write crap, and think that its acceptable to be read (I'm talking stuff like no spacing, horrible grammar, sex scenes up the wazoo, fan-wank, nothing but bashing…ect) then they have another thing coming. Hate stuff like that.**

 **But I digress (channeling my inner clement there), I have kept you here long enough…and yes, those brands of clothing are from Twewy.**

 **Now go outside. It's fucking rainy down here in texas.**

 **AND THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE!**

 **CUE THE AIRHORNS!**

 **BABABABABWAAAAAAAAAAAA!**


	6. Drinks are Drunk and Dicks are Punched!

**Warning people now. Grim dark as fuck scene is the first to come up. If your squeamish, or have something against reading incredibly gruesome or horrifying baby death, do not read the first scene.**

 **That said, I own nothing but the story you are reading. And I am so sorry this took so long to write up. I was caught up on one scene and didn't know how to go about it.**

 **Drinks are drunk and dicks are punched!**

* * *

 **Desolation.**

 **Desertion.**

 **Destruction.**

 **Ruin.**

 **Despair.**

 **Hopelessness.**

Those are the words that would describe the world that housed only to lifeforms, and a third on the way. There was no life. No hope. Only despair. Plants that were force fed the blood of innocents for nourishment, have withered and died. People that once populated the lands, now no longer existed. Their SOULs taken from them by **him.**

It was bleak, it was horrible.

 **It was the end of the world, one of many that have been felled by** _ **his**_ **hands. And if** _ **he**_ **had his way, it would not be the last.**

The woman, the last of this world, whimpered in agony and despair. Chained to a flat board, her legs spread eagle, and her head bent upwards so that she could see what she was slowly being dragged towards.

Her eyes opened and she cried in fear at what her eyes beholded. It was a **buzzsaw** , a rusty one caked in blood. And it was spinning. Blood dripped form her missing left breast, the one that _**he**_ teared off on a whim. That horrible, cruel, monster. He was the cause of all this, he was the reason why everyone on this bleak and hopeless world was dead.

She was beautiful once. She had a loving husband once. A man that she loved above all else. A man that made a wonderful child with her. A child that was to be brought into this horrible, despairing world today. And then… _ **he**_ came and killed them all...with a smile on his face.

He stood there, by her side, with a sickly smile on his face as he looked at the woman that was slowly being dragged towards the buzzsaw to be split in half. The woman cried out and stared into those orange, bloodshot, and demented eyes of his, and saw his horrifying smile. His teeth, that looked so much like shards of broken daggers, shinned brightly with splotches of blood and bits of flesh sticking out.

"Push…just push…and put that little abomination that's sticking out onto the murder wheel!" the **thing** snarled at her. With a cry of defiance, the woman did not push, but rather endured the pain of child birthing and kept it inside of her. As if to shield it from a horrible end before its life can even begin.

"If you won't push it onto the wheel of life…then I'll just have to make you." he whispered into her ear as fear clenched her heart. Cable-like wires, as thin as a yarn string, erupted from his knife-like fingers, and burrowed themselves into the woman's body. With a horrifying realization, she was unable to control her muscles, and again, the baby's head was poking out again…and slowly inching closer to the buzzsaw.

"No! Please no!"

It was close. So very close.

"Please no! I beg you!"

The newborn was crying, as if it knew of its impeding fate. But it's cries of horror fell on deaf ears.

"Kill me! Take my life! But leave my child alone!"

The man chuckled as his eyes gleamed unnaturally. He absently licked the woman's tears, before fondling her missing left breast. Blood rushing in and out of it, and dripping down his hand as he cupped and squeezed the infected, open wound.

"I BEG OF YOU MONSTER! KILL ME, TORTURE ME! TAKE MY SOUL! BUT LEAVE MY CHILD ALONE!"

The man looked her clear in the eyes and said one simple word. "No." he said with a smile. "Why should I do anything when it's your body that's pushing your child out? You must really hate it to do so…what a horrible mother…killing her own child just as it's born…" he whispered into her ear. Her one eyeball, the one that hadn't yet been ripped out, widened in horror. Her burned and scared face became the absolute picture of despair, and a scream of pure, primal horror sang out from her punctured and stabbed throat.

No one heard her scream. No one but the baby that screamed alongside her.

And then he flexed his finger. And the woman's body gave one final push, and the newborn child was ripped apart by the rusty and blood-soaked buzzsaw. Gore and giblets flying everywhere. But most prominently, onto the woman's face.

And the woman screamed. She screamed as tears flew down her cheeks like a flood unbound. She screamed as the life of her only child, a creation between her and her beloved husband, was shredded to pieces. She screamed as the buzzsaw began to tear into her body, slowly splitting her in half. And she screamed when _**he**_ ripped her soul from her body, and added it to _**his**_ collection.

And the **monster** only laughed in the face of all that he had caused. He laughed as the world around him deteriorated into nothing. He laughed as a world, once upon a time a cradle of life, was ripped apart by the dimensions around it.

And so, a world was lost. And no one would ever remember it. Such a tragic fate…but it is only a victim like so many others.

* * *

With a yawn, Sasuke Uchiha woke up from a power-nap on his bed. His room, while not as outrageous as some of his fellow compadres, still had that personal touch that showed the world that his room was _his_.

Rising up from his mattress, which was located on the floor (Too damn lazy to buy a bedspring), he got up and walked to the other side of the room, and opened up the middle drawer of a three drawer dresser. A bookshelf of nothing but CD's and movies that had five layers was situated on top of the dresser. The carpet of his abode, which reached into every corner of the room, was a deep Navy Blue.

He felt the wind from the overhead fan flow down his back, washing the heat away and cooling the room temperature. He idly turned his head left, and beholded the side of his room that had his bed with no bed-spring. On this side, he had numerous Musical Instruments hanging on the wall, ranging from guitars, to bass guitars, saxophones, other brass instruments, a violin, a viola, a flute, and a keyboard. These were his pride and joy, his life and his calling. Well, one half it anyway.

He then turned his head, and smiled when he saw his prized collection. Sitting on numerous hangers and racks, was nothing but Guns, Guns, and more Guns. From your standard Pistols, to your hard hitting Magnums, to trigger-happy SMG's, manly Shotguns, devastating Bazooka's and RPG's, hand held magic Railguns, Grenades and other explosives, mountains of spare ammunition, a bloody Minigun, Sniper Rifles, and of course, his personal favorite, a custom-made, long distance, Anti-Tank rifle with a barrel just as long as he was tall, a magic core at the very back just for that extra kick, and a leather handle.

His pride and joy, the _**Chidori**_. A weapon with a bloody history, and many conquests. Sure, he could do a lot of damage with the other weapons alone, but this was the one that he brought out when he wanted something **fucking dead**. It was the 'shit-just-got-real' weapon.

His personal baby. A baby made of magic refined Mythril, bathed in the blood of demons and monsters, tested against the hides of dragons, and stood proudly atop a mountain of corpses, with a smoking barrel.

Love at first sight if there ever was such a thing.

And thus, Sasuke went form a B-rank threat, to an S-class badass in the span of one day. The first of the CAT group to achieve that Rank. With Naruto being the next, followed by Mister Uzu, then Neji, and maybe Kiba. He was the Delivery boy.

Taking his little girl from the shelf on which she hanged, he began to take the powerful weapon apart, and took his time to meticulously polish every part of each component.

"My momma used to say 'always take a firearm with you wherever you go…or at the very least enough explosives to destroy an entire city'. And I gotta say, it's pretty helpful advice, it's helped me out of a lot of tough situations in the past…" the raven-haired young man said to himself as he cleaned the barrel, even though it was already shiny and spotless. That's the gimmick with Mythril, it never tarnishes. It's a magically powerful metal, and highly sought after for a reason.

"If that's the case you can go and help Naruto with his new place Uchiha." Drawled a voice that came from the direction of the door to Sasuke's room. Lifting his head up, Sasuke was beholded to the sight of a barely awake Shikamaru, shirtless, and wearing nothing but his Boxers, holding a steaming mug of coffee, leaning on the doorframe.

Sasuke absently began to put his beloved riffle back together as he raised an eyebrow to Shikamaru. The man, in response, sighed as he took a sip of his morning beverage. "New intel…the plan to make a branch of the 36 coffee shop was scrapped in favor of a bar. You can guess why…" the man drawled out.

"Let me guess…he realized that a bar is a better place to gather information that listening to gossip out in the streets? Drunk men are rather loose tonged…" Sasuke shot out while putting the grip back onto the base.

"More like drunk goddesses that go by the name 'Mikoto' are loose tonged and easy to get drunk." Deadpanned Shikamaru.

Sasuke froze for that split second, eyes wide in shock, before the cool-as-a-cucumber façade slid back into place instantly. There were no more words traded between the two, only a calm understanding. But before he turned and went into the shower, Shikamaru said one last thing to Sasuke.

"Oh, and Juvia's there as well. You know, the first girl you ever dated? The one who broke up with you? Setting a trend to come? Have fun with that." And like that, the door closed.

The riffle components in Sasuke's hands dropped to the floor as he froze in astonishment. His eyes going over to the bedside table were his alarm clock lay, as well as a framed picture of him and a blue-haired girl from two years in the past.

"Son of a bitch." He muttered. "Why do I have all of the teams' shit luck?" he asked his ceiling. He then went back to cleaning his gun, but with a vacant expression on his face.

* * *

"Hello you factoring hectopascal! How goes the refinery sigil?"

"I have no goddamn idea what I'm even doing! I know your smurt and stuff, but how the hell do you expect me to figure out these instructions!?"

"Foil: first, inner, outer, last! It's not that hard you yoctogram!"

"I have no fucking idea what that even means! I'm the delivery boy, not a scientist!"

"Use that brain that you don't have! It's not that hard! It's a simple algorithm, much like the rest of the illegal crap I'm helping you with."

"Could you at least try to speak English? I can't understand what it is your even saying! How the hell do you even know this!? I know you helped out Shika and Mister Uzu with the shop decal and player pins, but this is too advanced for even you to be able to figure out!"

"…you know, you're not as zeta stupid as you seem to be Radian. I knew there was a reason I liked you besides our mutual relationship of multiplied felines. If you really want to know, I got this from a 'fallen angel'. The guy was like a level _i_ explosion. He's been a major factor in our plans."

"Anyway, just follow those instructions. But hurry you non-real negative. Taboo Noise isn't exactly _legal_ , especially something on this scale."

And like that, the ever arrogant bastard left the CAT member alone in the alleyway. Leaving the scene of an incredibly complicated graffiti sigil that was colored black and white, and spread to every bit of the alleyway. From the floor, to the very top of the walls blocking the citizens of Crocus from seeing the intricate design that seemed to glow with power.

"Fucking annoying Pi faced asshole…" muttered Kiba as he picked up yet another can of spray paint. A set of incredibly detailed instructions and designs in book form held in his left hand.

* * *

"What the fuck is this shit? Who the fuck put in a glass pillar full of fish? This is a bar! Not a Goddamn aquarium!"

The three fox-masked maids did their best to look ashamed. While most would find it hard considering they have an unchanging face, body language tends to communicate more than we think. Although, curiously enough, the fox-masked maids were now sporting fox-ears. This sight led Naruto to believe that the maid pins were furries, and therefore defective.

In the end he decided to keep them. They did their job…even if they deviated from the plans he laid out. Instead of his original idea, the Fox-maids created a square in the middle, were all the drinks were located, as in the spot were Naruto would be the barman, and there were booths and tables on the outside ring, and Pool tables in the inner ring.

And for some Godforsaken reason, they put in a gambling room in the very back. Complete with Poker chips and card decks and all…recently used ones as well…

However, things like the glass pillars full of water and fishies, the Disco ball Hanging from the ceiling, and the strobe-lights that could be controlled via secret buttons beneath the bar counter were all things that, in Naruto's opinion, made the place really stupid looking. The ceiling fans in various parts of the bar helped out however. And they at least got the basement right, just one giant room filled with alcohol ranging from mildly intoxicating, to 'fuckin' dope!', and then to 'How-the-hell-is-this-shit-legal?'.

As a pre-caution, Naruto created a magic lock that was keyed only to him. This place was located in the same town as Fairy Tail, meaning Cana and Gildharts would probably visit sometime in the future.

The definition of 'Probably': meaning most likely after they were kicked out of the Fairy Tail bar.

"You got a lot of stuff right, hell; you made improvements to the original plans! So why the hell did you put all these…unnecessary additions in here!?"

"Probably because they thought you would like them." Spoke a cold, female voice from a table to the far right of Naruto.

Acting on pure reflex, the **Pin** mage Immedianlty channeled magic into his hand and flung it to the side, a blue boomerang construct flying from his hand with a cry of _**"Bat!"**_. His head now catching up with his body, Naruto watched as the magic spell flew towards the same starburst eyed cloaked figure from his talk with Mikoto.

The cloaked female, now identified as such due to the voice, simply narrowed her visible gaze against the projectile, and as if it was being controlled by an unseen force the boomerang stopped dead in its tracks. Not falling to the ground, not dissipating, not even moving. It just stayed there, as if it was frozen in time.

The female cloaked figure then threw off the black cloak that encapsulated her entire body; or rather the cloak threw itself off and began to float ominously behind her like some kind of demented guardian. Revealing a beautiful raven haired woman with her hair styled in a bun, wearing a white and black miko outfit.

"The first thing you do upon hearing my voice is to attack me? How barbarically pathetic and base of you." she spoke with a scowl marrying her, admittedly, beautiful features. Getting a closer look, Naruto saw that her ebony hair went into a bun atop of her head, and then cascaded down her back like a river the color of night. Of course, the rather conservative clothing that showed very little in the ways of skin probably added to her appeal, but the tin pin slammer was too focused on the fact that she could effectively null one of his spells.

"Bite me," he retorted as he swung himself over the bar counter and went to grab one of the drinks off of the shelf, "Maybe if you had entered the bar like a normal person we wouldn't be having this conversation. The hell are you anyway?" he demanded with a glare as he filled up a glass of gin. The woman in question simply glared and sat down upright into a chair that she conjured from nothingness.

"Satsuki, the goddess of vengeance and lighting, and your superior. So I would highly recommend that you cut your cheek and hold your tongue mongrel." She spoke in a haughty, confidant tone with a you-are-beneath-me smirk in her exotic eyes. Naruto simply looked at her while drinking from his glass, his mind working in figuring out how to deal with this woman, and how to get her out of his bar.

"And is there any reason you're here…? Because I highly doubt that you're here for a social visit. From what I can tell our family isn't exactly the kind to do gigantic social gatherings." He spoke without meeting her eyes. A sign that he didn't really care for her all that much.

"You are correct." She confirmed. A slight nod of the head as she conjured forth a cup of tea. With the tea blowing off steam and the cup being made of white porcelain. Mentally, Naruto realized that his mother's side of the family had a thing for tea, if Kushina, Mikoto, and now this girl were any indication.

"I am here because you are weak."

And like that, Naruto's demeanor changed. Gone was the impatient, if annoyed young man, in its place was a calm warrior as he stopped drinking his alcohol to stare at the intruding woman. But on the inside he was raging with anger. Not because she insulted him when he had to climb his way to power, to drag his broken and deader than dead body up to the heights of power by his own hands. Not because he just hated being underestimated in general, not any of those things.

But because he knew it was true. In comparison to the other entities in the world, the ones that could make mountains crumble, destroy cities without realizing it, bend the forces of nature to their will, and even rip apart the fabric of reality on a whim. He was weak in comparison to the people that really dictated how the world worked. He was weak compared to the creatures that were truly a threat to him and all that he cared for.

And he hated being reminded of that weakness. As if it spit in the face of that vow he made ten years prior, to never be weak again. He hated being reminded of that simple fact by someone who most likely surpassed him, and completely outclassed him. To be told that you're weak by one of the major players in the world.

That was what infuriated him. The simple truth that he was nothing in the face of true power.

"And what does that mean in the greater scheme of things?" he asked with a touch of venom to his voice. The goddess simply glowered at him for his disrespect. Being one who is born into power, raised in power, and worshipped for it would lead to arrogance.

And in this case it's true. Satsuki is an arrogant goddess. But not one drunk on her power. She had her duties, her dominions to oversee. And she would be damned if she ever slipped up on them. But if there was one thing she cherishes above all it was family. And then Naruto came along. And then started to ruin everything.

"You. You, who was born to our lineage before we ascended, are weak. You are a pathetic blight on our house, our family. You do not care for anything involving us…and I just can not have that." She then stood up, and projected her aura towards Naruto.

The air seemed to become colder as a black mist began to envelope the air around the bar, blue lightning crackling here and there in the midst of a dark mist. " **You are unworthy of your position as the eldest among us. You are weak, pathetic, and nothing but an ant, fit only to be stepped on.** "

Naruto's right eye suddenly exploded into an orange flame, power rolling off of him in droves.

" **What the all-watcher see's in you I can not understand. What my birth mother sees in you I can not comprehend. You are mortal, weak and misguided. And we are gods, immortal and powerful. The all-watcher has seen it fit for you to be the one who represents us in the world. You our are voice, our face, the light that is meant to guide humanity. You are supposed to be the will of the all-watcher, the goddess Kushina. And yet…you are unworthy of such a position. I simply want to rectify that.** "

"So you come into my bar, insult me, call me weak, and now you tell me that I'm not even worthy for being our insane mothers head priest or some bullshit like that?" Naruto asked while the gin glass was slowly cracking in his trembling grip. "It would seem that I'm not the only who inherited traits from our shared incubator…your just as arrogant as her."

The mist seemed to darken even more in response to that. Satsuki's appearance became more eathereal as well, what appeared to be crow wings made up of glowing black runes appeared behind her, two sets of them in fact. " **You would dare to judge me? I who guides the hands of vengeance, who gives men the ability to strike those who have wronged them. Who has fulfilled the prayers of the many, and granted them the power to kill their oppressors. I am she who brings forth the hammer of justice, with mighty lightning and rumbling thunder! And you dare to judge me!?** " she roared out, her eyes glowing red with pure anger. Black lightning then began to crackle in the air, ozone wafting into Naruto's nostrils as he extended his arm towards the enraged Goddess, his palm leveling outwards as it glowed with magic.

"You said you're here because I'm weak. So what are you here do to? Blow me up? Leave me a chard corpse? You know I can't beat someone of your caliber, but I won't let you blow up my place just because I bruised your pride. So go ahead and tell me why you're here and get out. _**I invoke the magic of hospitality,**_ and you're very close to being kicked out." He grounded out of his teeth.

And like so, a pressure greater than what Satsuki was dishing out was brought upon her shoulders. Like a switch was flipped, the ozone in the air disappeared, the oppressive atmosphere, that held a tinge of malice, went away. The ethereal wings made of shadow vanished completely. However the tension remained. The only thing that was new was the surprise on the Goddess's face as she stared at Naruto.

"Done your homework haven't you? You know the ancient laws and how we're restricted by them…maybe you're not as hopeless as I thought you were. What you seem to lack in strength you make up in foresight…or was this but a simple stroke of luck on your part?"

A snort from the elder of the two. "I was going to have a bunch of wards put up to block out intruders. You're lucky they weren't set up yet. If they were, you would have been rejected by the world, and left to rot as nothing but a magicless husk. Always knew that your kind would eventually rear they're ugly heads at me, so I made sure that I could at least have some form of protection." He replied while taking a sip of ginger ale.

A crackle of lighting. "Do you not even consider yourself a part of our family? Did you forget the teachings that our mother taught us from the moment of our birth? Perfection is Unity, together we are invincible and divided we are-"

"Six feet in the grave. Yes yes, I know. Thing is…that applies to family. And I don't consider that woman to be my mother. Not as she is today. And most definantly not tomorrow either. She hasn't been my mother in a long time…not since my sixth birthday."

There was nothing but silence in reply. But eventually a sound was heard.

"And so you ignore the second law of the Uzumaki…forgive your greatest enemy. Forgive he who slighted you the greatest. If you do then you have already defeated them. Only then can you-"

A glass was smashed against the floor. Whipping around, Naruto sent the Lightning Goddess a seething glare full of malice. " _ **You have overstayed your welcome! Leave now, and only return when invited! You will find no hospitality here until I say so! Leave! Leave and be cast out! Your name is stricken from they who are welcome in this house! Leave!**_ "

Eyes wide, and completely unprepared for such a response, Satsuki was sent flying towards the door as the universal magic of Hospitality, the domain of her older sister, took effect and flung her form the premise. Using her hands and fingers, Satsuki was able to latch onto the ground before she was cast out completely.

" _ **I declare vengeance upon you Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze! I will have petense for this offence! In two weeks' time I will take my revenge at the isle of the vanished! I challenge you by the rules of magic that dictate equilibrium! I will have the scales restored!**_ "

And like that, Naruto felt the domain of Satsuki, the Universal magic of Vengeance, fall onto his shoulders. Encouraging him to follow through with the goddess's declaration as she was thrown out of the open doors.

Exhaustion then seeped into the blond mages bones. Sinking into a seat, he pulled out an entire bottle of beer that had been mixed in with liquor. But not even a mixed drink was able to get him the slightest bit drunk. And it was only seven minutes later that his head rose from the bar counter, only to be filled with the image of a smiling Flowey.

"Wow. You just hate people don't you? I wonder how Mikoto's going to take this? But then again…we're probably going to have to hold your funeral in about fourteen days right?" spoke the flower. And then the smiling visage turned ghastly. "Such a shame to lose a great business partner. But then again… **that's life. Just a big ball of fun waiting to crash and burn.** **Just. Like You.** "

"SON OF A BITCH!" came a shout from outside the bar. A shout that sounded suspiciously like a slightly higher-pitched Sasuke.

"Ah. That's my que to leave. Here's a bit of advice…you're going to have to remove those gloves if you want to even have a chance of winning. Other than that…try not to die." And then the flower sank into the bar counter. Leaving a hole behind as the only proof that he was even there to begin with. And just as Naruto was about to share his rage with the world by throwing his empty bottle against the floor, the door burst open.

"SHE FUCKING KICKED ME IN THE NUTS! ALL I SAID WAS 'HI JUVIA? HOW YOU BEEN?' AND SHE FUCKING KICKED ME IN THE NADS! I NEED AN ICEPACK MAN!"

Naruto could only sigh.

 _It's going to be one of those day's isn't it?_

* * *

 _The authority of guilds and the management of their treatment is quite the interesting topic to cover when you get down to the meat and grind of it all._

 _Fiore is a national power. With superweapons that make every country, even the coalition of Mages tread Ishgals waters with caution. From the Ethereon satellite lazer, to the not-publicly-known-face bombs that could ruin magic the world over (note: the face bombs were decommissioned and deconstructed after an incident in x764 when a hunter from the town of Ragnel tried to set them all off. These day's the bombs are used as an intimidation tactic)._

 _However, one of the things that make the continent famous is its 'Mage Guilds' that are unique to it. No other country has actual legitimate guilds like Fiore. This is in part, due to the system that Ishgals magic council set up in order to better keep track of the continents mages._

 _Before the guilds were set up, the country was famous for being a lawless hub for mages that had no were else to go to gather and find work. It wasn't until a 'union' of mages decided that there was safety in numbers. And like so the first guild was created._

 _Evantually other unions emerged, staking claims to territories and claiming certain business avenues as theirs. Soon names were applied to certain unions, and reputations began to emerge. Until eventually certain unions were being singled out as being good for a specific type of job._

 _While Fiore was not a military powerhouse compared to other countries, there was one thing it had in excess. And that was wealth. The country of Fiore was incredibly wealthy. And the kingdom had decieded to put that wealth to use by creating a system that turned these 'unions' into the countries military. In return for a large pay grade, Unions would be christened as 'Guilds' and be given the freedom to chose their own jobs in return for fighting for Fiore in case of war._

 _In return, the guilds would have to monitor their own people and send monthly reports to an organization that's entire purpose is to watch over the magical population of Fiore. This 'magic council' decreed that all Mages that are not belonging to a guild will not have the same liberties and freedom that actual guilds have._

 _In essence this meant that if you were a mage in Fiore, and not sponsored by a guild, then you were going to have a very hard time finding actual work. People tended to hire guild mages like they do mercenaries. They do your work for you, and you pay them. And guilds were hotspots for jobs. As such, 'independent mages' quickly became a rarity. It just didn't happen anymore._

 _And to this day, this system is in place._

* * *

"Lovely, just lovely. You bring your ass into my bar, and the first thing you ask for is an icepack. She really nailed you there didn't she?"

"Fuck you! She hit me in the family jewels! Do you have any idea just how much they're worth!?"

"Ah yes, the mighty and elite Uchiha sperm. Truly one of Fiore's seven greatest treasures." He snarked back.

"Screw you Uzumaki!"

"Eat shit and die Uchiha!"

And then he drew out the Magnum with the foot long barrel.

"You wanna fuckin' go!?"

The orange, bright, glowing sword of magic materialized in Naruto's hand then.

"Bring it bitch!"

*CLANG*

And like that, the two CAT members hit the floor like chunks of dead prostitutes. And standing over their knocked-out asses were two made wearing individuals. The difference being the bunny tail/ears/mask one was sporting, and the cat ears/tail/mask the other was wearing. And each one was holding a frying pan.

Like lightning, Naruto was back on his feet, and sending a small glare at the masked-maids. He then snapped his fingers, before pointing at them with his fingers in a simple V. One flash of light later, there were two pins in Naruto's hands, and two less masked-maids in the bar. The two pins had graffiti style bunnies on one pin, and graffiti style cats on the other.

With a sigh, Naruto through the two pins into the air, and with another snap of his fingers, a flash of light, and the two pins were back into his requip space. Turning around, he was faced with the amused expression of one Sasuke Uchiha.

"Cat themed and Bunny themed? You have some kind of fetish or something?" he said with a smarmy smirk on his face. Naruto scowled in response, complete with eye-twitch and everything.

"Not my fault. The designs were defective. They're either glitching up, or achieving independence. I like to think that their just weird like that." He said with clenched teeth. Sasuke simply laughed at him while the Tin Pin Slammer brought out yet another alcoholic beverage.

"So what have we got?" asked the blond as he drank from his respective vice, while the Uchiha pulled out his own and lighted the end of his cigar. Wafting the smoke away, the Gunslinger propped a suitcase onto the bar counter, and unlocked its contents. Pulling out five separate documents, he spread them out on the counter.

He then pointed to the document that had a picture of a man with black hair set up in dreadlocks that went down to his shoulders. The man had a large vertical scar over his left eye (with his right eye being blue), and seemed to have a blue cybernetic implant in place of scarred eye. "That man is known as Hyde. Our target for the hunt tomorrow. He uses the tried-and-true sword'n'sheild set for a hunter. And apparently he was good enough with it to become an A class hunter. Has a personal vendetta against vampires as a whole. Nothing else on him."

Naruto snatched the document from the table and began to run over all that is said. "Blood type, birthday, zodiac sign, existing family, list of personal achievements, school records, and list of previous sightings. How the hell did Neji get all this?"

A shrug was his response. "Neji has connections. What do you expect? He's rather respected among Hunters. Why do you think they were comfortable with giving him all these documents for us to go over?"

"I thought that they just wanted to get rid of a rouge. Anyone else of note amongst this guy's runaway party?"

Taking a drag of his vice, Sasuke pointed to the next poster. A teenager with a scowl on his face. Green eyes, brown hair. Scraggly beard. Really needed to shave. "This kid is the only other notable Hunter among the group. Uses a sniper riffle designed to take down monsters the size of small mountains. Neji said that there was some speculation in the Hunter community that the kid has a bit of mage blood in him. But if he had any potential it would have manifested by now. High B class. Not much of a threat for people of our caliber."

"Watch your words on that. Better warriors have been known to have that as their last few words in the world." Replied the Tin Pin Slammer as he took a swig.

Sasuke had to snort at that. "It would be some serious bullshit if his magical abilities manifested themselves during the fight and it ends up being something that essentially null me ore you."

"Don't jinx us ya bastard. Karma loves to fuck with you remember?"

Taking a second. Sasuke decided to knock on the wooden counter. Twice. "Moving on," he then pointed to the third paper on the counter, which glowed for a second and became a pile of nine papers, "That right there is the dossiers of all the other Hunters that are part of Hyde's posy. Cannon fodder that specialize in specific areas is the best way to describe them. Not much other than that."

"…These aren't going to turn out to be surprisingly elite cannon fodder right?"

Sasuke blanched at that. "God I hope not. It would be the biggest pain in the ass if we had to deal with another strodenhime incident again."

The both shivered at that, before proceeding to indulge in their respective vices. Again. Pointing to the fourth paper with his cigar, Sasuke brought Naruto's back into the news. "And that right there," the document multiplied after glowing into seven papers, "Is all that you need to know about the place that we're going to be raiding. The abandoned 'Ley Fraount Pescilinina' hotel. Abandoned due to reported ghost problems…seemed that no one moved in once the problem was solved."

And like all people indulging in alcohol, Naruto began to reminisce…okay so maybe not everyone does that. But an amount does. "Remember that time we had to investigate a ghost problem? It was an abandoned house if I remember right."

Sasuke nodded at that. "Yeah…married couple. Drowned by their daughter. That was in the town Juvia was in remember? The girl that used to run with us for a while?"

Naruto frowned at that. "People suspected her of doing the deed. But we found evidence that it wasn't her. Straight from the mother herself right? Something about it not being her fault or something right? And didn't she kick you in the sack a while ago?"

Sasuke groaned…and held his icepack closer to his nads. "Fuck you man! Don't remind me of that shit!"

"Well maybe if you didn't bring up the chick that did it up I wouldn't have to bring it up ya bastard!"

"Eat my dick Uzumaki!"

"Die in a fuckin' fire Uchiha!"

And then he whipped out the magnum with the foot long barrel.

"You wanna fuckin' go!?"

The magic glowy sword materialized in Naruto's hand.

"Come at me bro!"

And then the frying pan from the remaining Fox-masked-maid walloped them both on the head. And like last time, they were up five minutes later. Although both were sporting large bruises on the back of their heads that were slightly swollen. Neither commented on that, simply just going with the flow and indulging their respective addictions.

It was then that Sasuke reached back into the suitcase and pulled out a smaller case, with intricate graffiti art designed all over it.

"Now don't get me wrong…but don't you think that this is overkill? These guys…their not exactly the kind of people you use this on…much less Hunter targets…"

However, Naruto simply waved him off. "My mother is trying to get involved with my life. Things are going to change…you never know when you're going to have to fight with all your might. I need these in case shit goes down."

Sasuke seemed somewhat convinced at that omission. But he still looked doubtful. "I don't know man. This kind of firepower is at least SS class if not SSS. This is the kind of stuff that can scar continents, force people to redraw maps, and even shatter islands. You sure about using these?"

Naruto simply smirked. "I'm positive. Besides, don't you have your own superweapon being built?"

Sasuke simply snorted at that while Naruto slowly opened up the case. Revealing six pins wrapped in velvet clothe. These were some of the most powerful pin magics in the world. Fashioned after the celestial bodies themselves, and imbued with the power to rend their enemies to nothing.

These were the **Darkstar Pins**. And they were Naruto's secret weapon.

* * *

Temi'ni'gru, the floating palace bathed in the light of the moon. The home of the All-watcher, the Goddess Kushina Oostusuki. She who sees the world, and judges with authority. It was a beautiful place, crafted by hand by the most powerful entity in the world.

When Kushina decided that she would create her home, she took the plot of the land upon which Yggdrasil was planted, and raised it into the sky. From there, into the very soil of that sacred ground, she planted her own bones. And from there grew trees made of porcelain white marble that were harder than diamond, and reached above the very heavens and touched the moon.

And then, with her own two hands, she cut those trees down, and began to build her palace. Etching the domains of the universe's magic's into the bone-wood, she carved magnificent spires, intricate designs, and built towers and walls to house her family.

Towards the north, she carved the tower for the shadow hand, to repay the companionship she received so long ago.

Towards the west, she built the tower of the huntress. To always be a shelter for the mistress of the hunt. To repay the loyalty she earned during the time of the forgotten.

And to the east, she raised the tower of the symphonies. To repay the handmaiden for her sacrifice.

And in the middle of it all, to stand above all, to better view the world, she built the spire of the all-watcher. To better view her cradle, and to deliver judgement to they who are unworthy.

These towers were all three times the size of a castle, with the spire of the all-watcher being twice the size of the other towers. At the very top of that spire was an altar, and before that alter was a water fountain that wrapped around the entire alter, and trailed down the entire spire by the side of the spiraling staircase. And upon that alter, every night, Kushina would fall asleep while casting her eyes onto the moon, to see all of the going-ons of her cradle.

Encircling the entire floating island was a wall, a wall half the size of the towers that connected each and every tower, as well as shielding the inside of the floating island form the rest of the world, through multiple bone bridges that crisscrossed and interconnected with one another. From a birds-eye view, it would look like a beautiful creation made by a spiders web.

And halfway through the all-watchers tower, on the middle floor, was a garden, attended to by Kushina herself. However, it was not a regular flatland garden like so many others. It was a garden that was based on the tops of trees that jutted outwards from the bone-tower of the all watcher. Intersecting and creating branching pathways to different hubs and small Eden's. On top of each tree was a small garden, instead of a shrub of leaves. Flowers of blues and reds, greens and yellows, purple and lilacs, oranges and whites. A veritable sea of flowers, up and down like waves

And it was in this canopy of nature, this wild, free, and beautiful garden that Kushina was located. Sitting on a tree trunk that curved sideways and watching the eternal full moon that always hanged above her palace.

"Kushina. We need to talk." Spoke a voice from behind the Goddess. Turning around, her floral-patterned eyes landed onto Mikoto's own beautiful crimson and black eyes. A small smile graced the Goddess's lips as she turned her gaze back towards the moon.

Mikoto, the hand of shadow, was wearing a simple nightgown that was somewhat transparent, made of silk, and was colored satin red. Kushina however, was wearing the same princess gown that she had worn the day she confronted her eldest on the train.

"It's a wonderful night out today isn't it Hiya? Much like the day we first met isn't it?" spoke the Goddess with a hint of nostalgia in her voice.

However, Mikoto's expression didn't change. "I have not gone by that name in centuries Kushina. I much prefer my current name of Mikoto. It does not have the same weight and meaning that 'Hiya' once had. And I much prefer to keep it that way." She spoke with the barest trace of venom in her voice.

Kushina turned around and gazed curiously at the Goddess behind her. "Is there something wrong beloved? Have I done something to offend you? If it truly bothers you that much I will cease with calling you Hiya."

A sigh escaped Mikoto's lips as she began to massage her forehead with her hand. "No. That's not it. I don't hate Hiya, she existed once upon a time. But her time is gone. Just answer me this love. Do you ever think of the consequences of your actions?" she inquired with a pointed glance.

A frown marred the divine features of the Goddess's face at that question. "No, why should I? I am not a mortal that must tread carefully lest he or she offends the wrong being. I am an immortal god. I stand above all. I am subservient to no one. Why should I care what the insects think? All that truly matters is you, me, Tsume, Hamura, and all of our children, and my cradle. All the mortals and base beings of it can die off, but nothing matters more to me than all of our family."

And with the perfect lead in, Mikoto pounced. "Then what of your eldest? What of your mortal child?"

Silence reigned as Kushina froze. Hey eyes had gone cold and silent. As if they had frozen in defense of something.

"He truly wants nothing to do with you. He hates you…I can see it in his eyes. He tries to deny it for the sake of the memory he remembers of you…but the contempt is there. He even hates me to a degree…"

No sound was made from Kushina as she turned back around to stare at the moon.

"While your eyes may see everything there is in the world…my eyes can pierce into ones soul. The very essence that makes up every persons heart is layed bare to me. But for some reason all I saw in him was an abyss with the slightest glimmer of light…but even that radiance was shattered…"

"He survived the Voidlands. It's only natural that it would have affected his very being."

"So why did you chain him to a binding contract Kushina? Why did you bind him to such a dreadful thing? What do you have to gain from doing such a thing besides his enmity?"

The accusatory tone in Mikoto's voice was visible to all that would bother to even hear the sentence. For the most part, Kushina seemed unfazed. But to the experienced eye, the small twitch of her right hand, the hand decorated with three rings, each bearing a different jewel, was a tell-tale sign that something was amiss.

"…Mikoto…do you know why I can see every single being in this world? It is because I am granted that authority by the universe. Everything that exists in the order system is visible to me. Everything that is natural and right is unable to hide before my gaze…"

Raising her arm, Kushina stared at her open palm. The Rinnegan eye on said palm stared right back at her.

"But then I met _him_. I knew not what he was. I could not perceive him. But he showed me his existence anyway. I could not understand anything he said. I could not…even form an inkling of an understanding of what I saw. This man, and I use the term lightly when describing this _Entity_ , existed outside the order system. He existed outside of what should be possible and just. He is something that should not be…and as such, I took the appropriate measures."

And then she clenched her hand with anger, a snarl forming on her lips.

"But he matched me blow for blow. He, something outside of the order system, was an equal to me. That is only possible to those that exist in future, past, and the present. This _man_ …this _thing_ …was scattered amongst all dimensions. He existed everywhere and nowhere. How he has cognitive thought is beyond me…"

A sigh escaped her lips as she slouched onto the tree she was sitting on, with Mikoto coming to sit beside her to stare at the moon.

"But that does not explain why you binded Naruto to that contract. You know as well as I do that that contract will kill him if he does not succeed with his task…so why would you do such a thing? Why would you do something so horrid? The woman I love would never do something like that to her eldest child…so why did you do it?"

A slight tremble shook Kushina as she brought an arm around Mikoto. "That man existed outside of the universe…and as such I could not see him. And even now, I know not where he is, or what he is doing. You ask me why I would bind my eldest to a contract such as that?"

Turning her gaze to her wife, Kushina looked Mikoto in the eye. "I could not see him. Even though I knew that he had exited the Voidlands…I could not find him. I could not sense him…nor his friends. And I have only experienced that with one other entity…"

Turning her gaze back to the moon, Kushina raised her other hand. Around this hand orbited a golden chain that intersected another golden chain, much like a double-helix.

"Naruto. My eldest. The first child of mine that I could feel actual love for…exists outside of order. He is something not meant to exist. He is someone who is a paradox. A contradiction. He is my eldest, yet he is also the same as that man. I can not see him with my eyes. He is not like the others of this world. I can not look at him and see the full might of his strength. I can not judge him and decree whether or not he has the power to kill us."

"Was it right as a mother to chain him to a death contract? No, it was not. Was it right as a Goddess to make sure a potential threat to my family could be eliminated? Yes…I like to believe so. At least this way I can see him now. I can see where he is when I focus on the contract. I can now watch over my son…but he is still a threat. An unknown variable. And I believe I took appropriate action."

Mikoto frowned at that. While she absently locked her hand with the one around her waist, she turned and stared at Kushina's floral patterned eyes.

"I see…Kushina…remember when we talked about your paranoia? Yes…I know that it's because you love us…but sometimes it's too much."

Kushina's eyes relaxed. But it was not in relief. But in resignation.

"Yes…I remember. I know what you and everyone else said. And I know you think it is too much…but to me, it's the difference between seeing all of you dead, and seeing your smiling faces."

Mikoto then planted a small kiss on the Goddess's lips, and then stood up and began to walk away.

"I know it's because you love us…but we both know there's more to it than that. You're letting your personal doubts and experience influence you. But remember this…when I looked at Naruto's soul…all I saw was a mirror cracked everywhere, missing pieces. One half of the reflection was human…the other half was a skeleton with a burning orange eye."

Kushina seemed taken aback at that admission. "A half skeleton…? Does he consider himself half-dead…?"

Mikoto continued to walk away. But Kushina could still hear her voice, low as a whisper it was. "I will sleep in my tower tonight…you know the reason why love…"

And with that whisper into the wind, Kushina went back to gazing towards the moon. A sad smile on her lips as the moon slowly bled red, with circles upon circles orbiting the celestial body.

 _I understand how you feel Hiya. You always were sympathetic to all that suffered. But I truly believed I did what was right for our family. Only those that exist outside of order can kill immortals such as we…goddess's that embody the magical aspects of the universe. Whether he knows it or not…Naruto is a danger to us. And I will not lose those that I love again. Not a second time…_

* * *

 **Fucking finally. This shit took forever. But next chapter we have the raid on the hotel. PLOT PROGRESSION BITCHES!**

 **It seems that theres trouble in paradise here…But at least they're being civil right? They're mature…they can talk it out. Cue five hundred bullshit rant about that. And it would seem that Juvia has a bit of a past with our resident ladies man, wonder how that ended? And what's this? It was JUVIA that broke up with the guy and not the other way around?**

 **Yeah, certain characters backstories are being tweeked. Let me say it right now, Juvia's past is not exactly the happy happy kind. In fact its kinda depressing. And yes, I introduced everyones favorite Pi faced egomaniac! I friggin love the guy, from his character, to his quotes, and even his fight was fun…when he wasn't being a flunky boss and throwing out mooks. And villain reveal!**

 **Here's the hint, he's not an original character. In fact, you could consider him the most unoriginal thing on . Won't be giving out anymore hints.**

 **Do any of you know just how fucking tedious and time consuming it is to get all the Darkstar pins? I was most certainly not 'Enjoying the moment'. Also reaper Beat can kiss my ass! I leave the game alone for a month and I completely suck at it!**

 **Speaking of, does anyone know what to do when your 3ds stops reading the cartridges? The games work…its just the system. Is there anyway to fix it or will I have to either ship it off to Nintendo or get a new one? I am due for an upgrade…I just don't have the money or time to invest in one. Seriously, I get all the pin names from the game itself. As well as a lot of inspiration from the games I play.**

 **Anyway, tell me what you think of this chapter in the reviews, as well as things I can improve on!**

 **AND THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE!**

 **CUE THE AIRHORNS!**

 **BABABABWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!**


	7. A look at what else goes on in the world

An introspective look on the water woman.

 **I AM SO DAMN SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG. MY FUCKING COMPUTER HAS A BROKEN CHARGER PORT, AND IT NEEDS TO BE FIXED. That and I'm lazy. So whatever floats your boat. Remember people, this is AU, things are going to be different**

* * *

 _He was here again. In this nightmare world. Both figuratively, and literally. It was a hellish land, were nothing could survive. And on the other hand it was his nightmare specifically. One that had been repeating ad nauseum for him ever since he had escaped._

"Why? Why was I so stupid back then? Why couldn't I see through it all that it was nothing but a trap?

 _Separated from his friends, lost amongst the shadows and creeping crags. The ominous, dreadful sky. A mixture of swirling purples and malicious blacks. The earth, rippled with cracks and craters. Belching out toxic miasmas to kill all who dared to traverse through the land._

"Just run you stupid fool…just run. It's already too late to save them…just run. Please…just run…"

 _Hunted and hunted. Day in day out…or was it night in night out? There was no such thing as 'daytime' in the Voidlands. There was only despair, fear, and hopelessness. It did not matter how fast you could run, how far you could go, or even how strong you were in a fight._

 _They would catch up to you. They would wait in the shadows, ready to pounce on you when you became exhausted. And it did not matter how tough you were. The sheer numbers of them would eventually overwhelm you…and then they would take you. The relentless and patient hunters of the Voidlands. Malicious thought and despairing weakness given horrifying physical form._

"They're not real you stupid kid…they're just using your hope against you. Don't fall for it…please don't fall for it like I did…"

 _While a cosmic horror in every sense of the title, they were not the worst of what prowled the desolate wastelands of the void. No, there was something even worse. Something that would gleefully tear you apart, and disassemble your mind in the process. An entity that was unknown to almost all of existence. A creature that no one acknowledged, no one wanted to exist._

 _But it did. Because existence denied it its right to life, it exists._

"Don't go in there…for the love of god, don't go into that cave…selfless moron…they're not real….she's not real…and even if she was…she wouldn't take you back. She's a monster…why do you think she killed you?"

t **O** _t_ _ **Hi**_ **n** _k T_ H _a_ **t** _ **a**_ _ **M**_ _o_ **r** _ **T**_ **A** L w _ **OU**_ _L_ d b _ **E s**_ O _F_ _ **o**_ O _l_ _ **iS**_ H a _S_ **T** _o_ H **o** _l_ D o _n_ T **o** _ **S**_ _u_ C **h** _P_ a **t** _H_ **e** _ **t**_ **i** C n _ **o**_ _t_ _ **io**_ N **s O** _F_ **aT** _A_ **c** H _ **M**_ **e** _N_ t

 _And then it turned its gaze to him. And he knew, in that moment, that he was not even an insect before the entity that all had wished away. That he was less than nothing. That if he were to die in that very moment, the only entity to remember him would not even bother to do so. That his life, the sake of his existence, belonged completely to the entity before him._

"You should have run when you had the chance kid…now your going to have to endure what I went through…"

 _And in the presence if this thing, this being that dwarfed everthing before it, he took a step back in fear._

 **Yo** _u_ h **O** _l_ d _**o**_ _V_ **er** _FL_ **o** I **i** _N_ g _A_ n **G** _e_ **r** _ **i**_ N y _ **o**_ **U** _r_ **S** o **U** _l_

 _And now its attention was on him. And he had nowhere to run. No hope to escape the entity. The entity that had suddenly taken an interest in him. A lost spirit in the Voidlands._

 **i** s _h_ **a** _L_ **l** b **R** i _ **n**_ **G i** _T_ **t** _O_ _ **t**_ h **e** _S_ **u** _ **r**_ **F** _a_ c **E**

 _the being pulled, and the child clawed at the ground in a feeble attempt to get away. It was to no avail, for nothing could help the child escape from the grasp of the entity before him._

 _ **Y**_ **o** U _s_ **H** a _l_ _ **L**_ _W_ **eA** _r_ **O** _ne_ _ **o**_ F _m_ **y** _ **Se**_ **v** E _n_ **m** _a_ **R** k _s_

 _Y_ **o** _u_ **w** _ **H**_ o **H** _o_ **l** _d_ s _**sU**_ c _H_ _A_ **n** g _ **E**_ **R** i **S G** _ **ui**_ **Lt** _ **Y**_ _o_ **F** _o_ **N** e _C_ **r** im _ **E**_

 _And then unimaginable pain coursed through his back. As if he his very existence was being ripped asunder, and then put back together. It was as if the being before him was reshaping him to its whims. And he could do nothing but howl. Howl towards the merciless black abyss that was the sky. The treacherous lands that he had been forced to wander and survive on for the past nine-hundred years._

 _The lands he hated the most in all of his memory. The lands that had taken friends and companions. The lands that brought forth monsters that would hunt them down mercilessly, and destroy their memory by impersonating those that they hunted. He had lost more than a few companions due to caution._

 _And then finally, the pain stopped. Blood oozed down his back, and trailed down his legs, before falling to the cracked and dead earth around him. Although there was enough blood flowing from his back to form a pool around him, the child did not fall to his knees. Instead, his eyes burned with anger, as he stood defiantly against the entity before him._

Y _ **o**_ **u A** r _E t_ _ **h**_ **E S** _i_ n _**o**_ **F W** r _a_ T _ **h**_

 _ **A**_ _he_ **r** a **L** _ **d**_ _O_ _ **f**_ **T** _h_ E **e** _n_ _ **D**_

" _W-what are you…?" whispered the child to the entity._

 _And then the small being felt the greater entity's eyes on his person._

 _ **I**_ **a** M _C_ **al** _ **L**_ E **d -**

 _The child then felt an agonizing pain in his right eye. Which had begun to glow a bright, fiery orange. With a cry, the child demanded of the greater entity- "What have you done to me!?"-to which the greater entity ignored. All that is did was look into the distance, at the eavesdropper._

"Well at least I know why you turned away. I still fucking hate you…whatever you are."

 _The greater being only chuckled. As if it did not care in the slightest about the man staring at it from across the gorge. It then turned towards the child that was crying tears from the pain of its transformation. Wet tears of water flowed from its left eye…and crimson blood flowed from the other._

 **a** n _D NO_ **w** i _ **T**_ **I** _s_ **T** _i_ m **e** _fOr_ **Y** o **U t** _O w_ **A** _k_ e **u** _ **P**_

* * *

And thus, Naruto Uzumaki woke up, in a cold sweat, his right eye flaring up like mad, and half of his soul aching in protest. He then turned towards to the mirror, where he saw his reflection clearly. He then held up his arm, and saw the golden chain encircling his wrist. And then he felt the mark that had been engraved on his back ache in phantom pain.

A sigh escaped his lips before he chuckled. But it was not a laugh of amusement. No…it was hollow.

"And so, it is only now that I realize…that I am marked by two different entities that I hate. And both of them are so out of my league it's not even funny…fuck my life…"

"This is humiliating. What is captain Undyne thinking? Why must I be a delivery girl when I could be doing something more productive?" grumbled an armored, female, and redheaded form as it walked down the stairs of a castle corridor.

It was a beautiful castle, a marvel of architecture. Grand hallways with paintings of past heroes and nobles, knights patrolling at each and every corner, red carpets on the floor, and wondrous gardens outside of the walls, and inside them as well.

Recruits were being drilled outside, soldiers were either training, eating, or working on some task set forth by a superior. And here she was, walking into the depths of the dungeons to deliver a package to the head royal scientist. She, Erza Nightwalker, being used as nothing but a messenger girl! It was an outrage!

Knightwalker is a well-endowed female with long, flowing, wavy scarlet hair with an elegant, loosely tied knot at the back. Erza Knightwalker wears a very provocative outfit comprising of a revealing, halter-type armor breastplate top, that leaves much of her cleavage and stomach exposed, with light-armored gauntlets and greaves on her forearms and forelegs, respectively, as well as her thighs. She also wears a dark bikini bottom with a piece of cloth obscuring her hips. She wears a dark scarf around her neck.

Walking down the stone steps, the knight comes up to a wooden door. Angrily slamming the door with her gauntleted fist, she angrily calls out- "OPEN UP OROCHIMARU! I HAVE A DELIVERY!"

There was a crashing sound from behind the door, as well as the sound of something breaking. A few curses later from two different voices, and one boom later, the door was opened by a very pale man.

Orochimaru Ryugi, the head Royal scientist was a peculiar man of peculiar tastes. When outside of the laboratory he wore the most _**outrageous**_ of outfits. Ranging from the fashionable, to the gaudy, to the glitzy, and the glamorous. But when he was in the lab, he could always expect the good ol' lab coat'n'tie to be there on his person.

Of course his pale yellow, snake like eyes always made people uncomfortable. Fun fact: he didn't always have those. They used to be a rather striking emerald green. They became that yellow snake like kind of eye when he tried to splice his DNA with that of a snake. His reasoning? FOR SCIENCE!

"Oh hello Erza dear! I didn't expect you to arrive so soon after I made that purchase. Oh, I must say, that armor is downright FABULOUS! Come in, come in, you would not _believe_ the things we're doing down here! Oh, love the hair by the way."

And like that she was dragged into the laboratory with only one thought going through her mind.

' _This is why I hate coming down here._ '

The laboratory was a sight to behold. Well to an organization nut it would be. There was the main lab, a large circular room that had many different computer screens displaying various reports and experimentation footage. And then, at the east and west points of the main lab, were two hallways that led to different chambers and rooms.

And it was down the hallway to the west that Orochimaru was giving Knightwalker the grand tour.

"And you see, down there is where we experiment on the… _frisky_ subjects." He said with a raising of the eyebrows, pointing towards a lab room labeled 'Lab 14'. A horrifying cry of terror emanated from the Lab as Erza and Orochimaru walked by it.

"Frisky…? I'm…not even going to ask. Where are you taking me?"

Orochimaru grinned at the Captain next to him as he pulled her along. "Oh, just to see an _amazing_ specimen that Doctor Zestu found a while ago. And I gotta say…it's got _legs_." He said cheerfully along with a leery expression on his face. Erza, understandably, was disturbed by the man.

' _At east he's not flirting with me. Or trying to…I've seen him try and seduce the knights upstairs, This is not him flirting…thank the heavens for that. I do not need to have a meeting with officer hotpants._ '

And then the Knight stopped suddenly. Her eyes trailing back to Lab 14. She then turned back towards Orochimaru. "You're experimenting on humans? I thought that king Asgore forbid that!" she all but shouted towards the scientist.

Stopping mid-step, the man spinned around on top of the balls of his foot. A smiling expression still on his face. "Well at first we were testing things out on lizards. Progress was slow hun, so we started to use human subjects!" the snake-like man said with cheer. He then smiled at the knight, showing off his teeth and fangs, while holding up his pointer finger, pointing towards the laboratory ceiling.

"Volunteers only of course. Having to kidnap people off the streets is just waaaaaaaaaay too much trouble darling." He said with a wink.

"But his royal majesty expressively forbid it!"

He then began to wiggle his finger in front of her face. "Ah, ah, ah. That was when Asgore was in charge. Faust tends to prefer actual results as compared to morals. The boys at the bio-labs absolutely _loved_ it when they heard that certain restrictions were going to be lifted."

"And you?" she asked with a pointed glare. Making the scientist in front of her chuckle.

"Honey, I'm a physicist. Morals can't bog me down when there are none blocking the way. Faust had me look into…less… _physical_ forms of research. Ever heard of the anima?"

Wide eyes stared straight into the mischievous ones belonging to the now revealed physicist before her. "That invention was _you!?_ " she cried it with no small amount of shock.

In response the man only laughed. "HA! I wish." He dismissed. "I simply found the blueprint designs left behind by Minato, and worked from there. Granted, he was really close on some of his calculations. A zero here, a one and two there…brilliant in figuring out how to make the impossible work he was. An eye for the smaller details that are essential? No he was not."

Erza blinked in surprise. "You actually worked with the previous head scientist? The famed inventor Minato Namikaze?"

"He was a colleague of mine. Brilliant mind, and sharp as a tack. Easy on the eyes as well. He was quite the pretty boy if-ya-know-what-I-mean." He whispered into her ear while producing a photo of the man shirtless. Needless to say, the redheaded knight found herself blushing at the sight of the man in picture.

Putting the photo away, the man continued with his speaking, "He was an amazing man with an amazing future set up for himself. Its sad to know that he has left us, and that his living legacy perished as well."

And then he immediately turned around on the balls of his feet.

"Anyway!" he shouted, the cheer coming back in full force and replacing the rather somber attitude of before. "And down there's our magic weapons research lab!" the odd man exclaimed with cheer, pointing toward a lab labeled as 'Lab 15'. "It's down there that we make so many fascinating toys! And where we make all that armor that makes everyone just look so _dashing!_ "

"Oh dear god…" mumbled Knightwalker as she continued to follow the man down the laboratory.

"You see, that's the lab where your sword and shield were made! As well as the standard suits of armor and weaponry that all you handsome knights use in service to our amazing kingdom!" he said while pointing dramatically with his fingers.

And then his smiling face became unnaturally focused as he stared at the knight. Making the Knightwalker fidget uncomfortably.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" she asked with a bit of a pointed glare. The man only looked at her a bit sharper.

"You're Undyne's personal apprentice correct? Why is it that you use a sword and shield when you should be trained in the arts of the spear?" he asked with curiosity.

Erza simply glared at the man while crossing her arms, the package still in hand. "That's none of your business sir. That does not concern you, and you would be wise not to pry into that matter."

Getting the point, the man went back to his regular cheer and guided her through the labs. Talking about each and every one of the Labs and what they researched, as well as how they improved the lives of all in the kingdom of Edolas.

"Sir, the pistons jammed! I can't push it in any deeper!"

"You have to push harder! Show that rod of steel who's boss! Dominate it! Make it your bitch!"

"Thank you sir! I will shove it in harder to make it go in deeper! Thank you for your advice sir!"

"Not to worry! I always have time to spare to help a fellow researcher in need…I care for _all_ of you."

…as well as give…helpful advice to his fellow colleagues when they were in a jam.

This would continue on for Labs 16, through Labs 24 and 25. It would be when they arrived at Lab 26, Doctor Zestu's personal, Lab that things would change.

Lab 26 was very different from the previous ones, for one simple reason.

It was a biology Lab. The other ones were simple research and experimentation Labs that used magic in conjunction with the research to better improve it. This was a Lab that had not even an iota of magic in use. It was a purely Biological Lab, with one subject.

Doctor Zestu was an interesting man. His body was entirely the color of an oily black, with piercing yellow eyes without pupil or sclera. Making him appear to be some kind of monster or fiendish creature that stalks the night.

He was a practical man, one that did not bother wasting his time on frivolous things.

On his body was a lab coat that was buttoned up, showing that the man was currently in the process of using various chemicals and such. White gloves covered his hands, just like the rest of the scientists in the Labs. However, unlike Orochimaru, there was no tie to be seen on this man. White shoes tapped against the floor as he stared impatiently at a monitor before him.

The Lab was a spacious one, with turquoise tiles making up the floors, walls, and ceiling. In the middle of the room was a large cylinder incubation chamber, with the subject floating in special liquid synthesized specifically for the purpose of preserving it.

Hooked up to said chamber were man different wires of different colors. And those wires connected to various monitors and computers that displayed specific information about the subject. Each monitor and computer screen detailing, and or measuring something different about the subject.

"Heeeeeeellooooo Doctor Zestu!" cried out the snake-like man with cheer and joy as the twosome entered the Lab. A groan came from the all-black man as he face-palmed his face. Dread and frustration literally dripping off of the man in the form of a purple cloak of aura.

"Dear god not you again…" the scary looking scientist muttered under his breath as he turned around to see his two guests. Orochimaru, was happily bouncing off of the top of his feet, an insufferable smile on his face as he looked straight at the head Scientist of Lab 26. Next to him, was Erza Knightwalker, the protégé of the captain of the king's guard, giving him a look of pure pity.

"So," began the otherworldly looking man, "To what reason do I owe this…visit? Intruding? Crashing? Orochimaru, what would this qualify as?"

"A tour my good sir!" he said with an exaggerated wave of his hand.

"Yes…a tour…and pray tell, why are giving a knight, someone who has no place among we men of science, a tour of the facilities?"

"Weeeeeeell…She's pretty?"

"…That's not a reason."

"Well we are using her DNA for the mutant super soldier project that I commissioned…"

"One, She's not supposed to know that. Two, get her out of here. Three, she's staring at my life's greatest work. And four, I thought I told you that we will not waste our time on such stupid endeavors, even if they do turn out to be major successes and breakthroughs…"

A sly smile made its way onto the snake man's face. "Hmm? Who's the head scientist around here plant boy? I can do whatever I want down here. And quite honestly…I don't give a damn what you think darling."

"You should…" the dark man growled out, "This is my lab, and only I know what is what in here."

It was then that the Knight in the room spoke up. "Then can you tell me just _what the hell_ is that that your growing in that tube?" she asked with a steel in her voice that had Orochimaru say "Ouch! The edge…it's sharp and pointy…"

The subject in the test tube was something out of a horror movie. It was not a monster with tentacles and sharp teeth everywhere. It was not a giant floating eyeball suspended in animation. It was humanoid in shape, with an obviously female figure.

But that's where the human similarities ended.

For one, there was not a hint of skin anywhere on the body. It was pure muscle and sinew. And even then, it was missing some in various places. Erza could see the inside of the stomach, a giant gaping hole that went through the entire thing. Fibers and muscles barely covering the hole.

In another spot, the knight could see the bones just barely forming. The left and right hands barely had any muscle on them, revealing terrifyingly sharp bone claws. The face was barely formed, with one half a complete skeleton visage, and the other barely held together sinew. However, both sides did indeed have eyes. The skeletal side had an eye resting in its socket, while the other side had a flap of skin covering its eye.

The worse part? The mouth was open, gaping out like the subject was screaming. And there was no hair to be seen on it as well.

"Doctor Zestu, just what the _hell_ am I looking at!? This thing…it looks like its in pain. Like its somehow alive!"

"That's because it is girl. This is my life's greatest work, the first ever artificial human being. Created, from a single cell by me." Spoke the good doctor. A smug grin on his face as his hollow yellow eyes stared with pride at his creation.

"Ah, but just wait till you hear just who he grew this beauty from! It's a guaranteed sur-prise!" the snake man singed out.

Erza was almost afraid to ask as she turned around and stared at the otherworldly doctor. "Just…just who did the DNA come from? Just who did you spawn this from…?"

A sadistic grin formed on Doctor Zestu's face. "Now that would be telling. And I will not ruin the surprise for when she is finished. This is my creation, my subject nine, the first ever human weapon built for the sole purpose of killing the Gods."

And the moment those words were uttered there was nothing but silence, as Erza's face became a picture perfect representation of horror. And the closed eye of Subject Nine opened up, and saw the face of its creator.

* * *

 _For once Juvia is happy. For once Juvia is accepted. For once Juvia does not have to worry about going overboard with her abilities. But like always…Juvia is afraid someone will discover what she is. No such thing as a perfect secret. Eventually Juvia will be found out…Juvia doesn't want that…_

Juvia is a slender, young woman with blue hair, dark blue eyes, pale skin and a curvaceous figure. She has long hair, tightly curled at the base, wears a navy blue coat that ends at the ankles, a fur shawl, and a Russian Cossack hat.

A wistful sigh escaped the water-woman as she gazed into the sky. The blue-haired woman was lying on a hill behind the Fairy-Tail guildhouse. A tree was growing out of the side of the hill, providing shade to one side of the land-mass.

' _Sometimes Juvia wonders,'_ mused the water-woman, _'if whether or not she did the right thing leaving the group before Phantom...no, Juvia was right to leave them. They were close to discovering Juvia's secret. And Juvia can not let that happen. Even if she must cut off all contact with them…its better for them to remember Juvia as Juvia…and not something else.'_

"Hey, uh…miss. You ordered a package?" came a rather tired voice from above the water woman. Snapping her eyes open, with the pupils of her ocean blue eyes glowing a fearsome aquamarine color, she turned her head to stare at one Kiba Inuzuka in a red tracksuit.

Blinking, Juvia gets up from her position on the ground, and squints at Kiba, before her eyes widened in shock. "It is you! Juvia remembers you!" she exclaimed while pointing at the cat lover with her finger. Making him raise an eyebrow at the water woman.

The parcel was underneath his armpit, and he had a clipboard and pen in hand, while the other hand was free for scratching the head use. "Geh…Okay, I know I've seen you before…wait a minute…" he then squinted real hard and stared at her for a good few minutes.

"…Holy shit. Juvia, is that you?"

And like that he was hugged by the water woman with the ferocity of a bear. Making him gaps for air as his face slowly began to turn purple.

"Juvia! Can't…breathe…! You're crushing me!" he gasped out as he struggled fruitlessly against the rain woman's iron grip. Finally, after what seemed to be five minutes, but was in actuality five minutes and two second, Juvia let go of the Cat lover. Letting him fall down to the ground, gasping for air as he knelt down to gather himself.

Shakily, he stood up, and flashed the rain woman a tired smile. "Jeez louise Downpour, that's quite the reaction to someone you haven't seen in only two years. How's it been for you? Having fun in Fairy Tail?" he said with a grin, poiting his thumb towards the ocean blue guildmark on the back of her hand. Running parallel to the CAT Skull Pin mark on her other hand, the left one.

"Ah," with a smile Juvia intertwined her hands behind her back and leaned slightly toward the feral looking CAT Member, "Juvia was accepted without trouble, and has been enjoying her time in the guild. They are bright, friendly, and encouraging to Juvia. She enjoys being a member of Fairy Tail." She said with a genuine smile on her lips.

With a chuckle Kiba began to stretch out his legs a bit. "Good. It's nice to know your doing well after your tenure in Phantom Lorde." He said nonchalantly, not even taking heed of Juvia's alarmed looks at the omission.

"You…you knew?" she questioned uncertainly, a nervous look on her features as she inwardly shrunk back a tiny smidgeon. Kiba only picked up the fallen package and clipboard as he smiled at Juvia.

"We of CAT always keep track of our members. Just because you left doesn't mean we stoppd monitoring you. You never truly left in the first place after all…"

The rain woman stared at the feral man as he handed her the clipboard and pen.

"…You never got rid of our mark. You still proudly display the mark of the interdimensional investigation group that took you in. Once a member of CAT, always a member until given the appropriate leave."

Numbly, Juvia wrote her name on the clipboard with a shaky hand. And then was embraced by a small hug from the Cat-like man, allowing him to slip the package into her hands. He then stepped back and sent the clipboard to his **Re-quip** space.

"Look, sorry to the cut the reunion short, but I have a lot of places to go in a short amount of time. But I know a decent bar were we can catch up. You can bring up a few friends if you want. What do you say to that?"

"…Yes?" she replied uncertainly, still slightly surprised by the fact that the group didn't resent her for abandoning them without any explained reason. For a guild, if a member leaves for no discernable reason, and does not check in with the guildmaster before doing so, and does not retrieve the proper send off, it is considered a betrayal. Especially so because the guildmark can send messages to the guildmaster about the whereabouts of the deserter, and whether or not the one fleeing in question has betrayed guild secrets.

Juvia was liable to be branded a traitor to CAT and treated as such. It was…surprising to say the least that Kiba was treating her as such, especially when there were incredibly infamous cases of guilds dealings with traitors in vindictive, even gruesome ways.

"Awesome," he said with a grin before shoving a paper with the location of the bar into her hands. "Be there around Tuesday at nine. Bring some friends with you, we got a lot to catch up on!"

And with that, Kiba turned around and took off. And then Juvia's training kicked in, and she went through the lessons she learned in her head. Especially the most important one the CAT crew taught her when they were training her investigation and survival skills.

 _Always look underneath the underneath. You would not believe the amount of ulterior motives and conspiracies that we discovered simply because we looked at a forgone conclusion more closely._

And like that, Juvia realized that she had been set up by Kiba. Since when did he expand his delivery service to Mangolia? Never. He set his services up in Crocus, and all the port towns, so as to better gather information about the going-on of the other continents.

And with a snap of her fingers she realsied another simple truth. Because Kiba was expanding out to Mangolia, which meant that the rest of CAT was also expanding as well. She knew how the CAT information network worked to a degree, with each member running circuits around specific circles and using various magical methods to gain information.

Kiba ran a delivery service that gave him a plausible reason to be pretty much in any area of Fiore, but he mostly stuck to the port towns.

Sasuke was well known in many high class circles and knew how to chat someone up. He was also very well versed in how to read between the lines.

Mister Uzu stuck to the criminal scene and the underground in general.

Neji was surprisingly in the art and archeological area, keeping his ears open for any news about random magical artifacts and discoveries revolving around objects related to Zeref. He also had decent connections among the Hunter's association.

Shikamaru had a way into the main archive network of the magic council, and kept his eyes out for any juicy bits of news.

Flowey, for how much she detested that malice filled monster, was amazing for his ability to commune with things of natural origin. According to him, Trees and flowers were huge gossip ducks. There was a surprising amount of information one could achieve simply by talking to a tree.

Naruto was well known in many circles that were not of human origin. He was fairly popular with the vampires, respected among the elves, and was rather well liked in general by the nonhuman committee.

And there was finally her…the one who had connections for the places that no human could ever hope to get into contact with. In the two years that ran with CAT, they only needed her help for two cases. Those were they only times she used her connection to chase down criminals who had managed to become something more than human…

Looking down at the paper in her hands, Juvia smiled. It would be good to catch up with some old friends.

* * *

Shifting through the documents handed to him by his fellow organization members, the newly-christened bar-owner sat at his desk, on the second floor of the 36 bar in Magnolia. It was a small room, originally in absolute disrepair, it had been spruced up the constructs the blond mage created from a combination of magic and Reaper Noise.

Minus the…abnormalities of the other two, the original Fox design of the pins seemed to work the best, and had the least chance of going haywire. In testing, he had to deal with designs that would lash out and try to kill him. If course they all ended up dead. One does not take on a S-class mage without any sort of preparation.

Further testing revealed that the Fox design, Kushina's design, was the most docile. Although for the life of themselves, Shika and Mister Uzu could not figure out how to stop the Fox design from obtaining individual characteristics. They wanted a source of cheap labor that wouldn't…most likely rebel when they put them to work. Although so far the bar-maids didn't seem to mind the work. In fact, they seemed to revel in the attention they received from all of the bars patrons.

Now, what Naruto wanted to learn was whether or not the Fox design could be modified to do different occupations. Instead of just a workforce of heavy lifters or servants, he wanted to see if they could be converted to do espionage work, or maybe even muscle for protection jobs. But alas, it would seem that they were stuck as maid servants.

Now, what the blond **Pin** mage was reading through was a document on one of the rouge Hunters. Specifically the one that was rumored to have a bit of mage blood in him. The teenager, age of sixteen. A Hunter always had a weapon on him, one made specifically for him. Custom tailored and all…well the ones that had any talent. And it would seem that this Hunter was one of the many who had a weapon made just for him.

A high caliber rifle that used magnets as a propulsion system to launch bullets the size of a human hand. According to the document Neji was able to get for him, it was a weapon that had been used to combat beasts the size of small mountains. Jhen Morans and the like. His kill count, and his achievements put him on a higher pedestal than Hyde when you factor in the kids age.

' _Although a high caliber sniper round will put him out. We don't need the rest alive, just Hyde. Even then, just barely. As long as our client gets to have her fun with him, and we get paid, everything will be alright._ '

And then he pulled up the document about the Ley Fraount Pescilinina Hotel. And when he finished running his eyes over its contents he pulled up his bottle of jack. Chugged it for a good second or two, put it back into his drawer, and looked back at the document. "I think I'm buzzed enough to read this again." He stated in a flat voice.

And then he read it again. And then slammed his open palm against his face, and groaned at the sheer stupidity of what he read. "Of course the place it haunted…the builders were too fucking stupid to realize that building a hotel _on top of a burial ground_ it a fucking terrible idea!" he groaned out.

And then the banging on the door commenced. And with a loud "Shut up Uzumaki! I'm trying to sleep!" the Uchiha went back to bed, leaving behind an annoyed blond who was glaring at the door in contempt.

With a glare directed towards the door of his small, four corner office room, with his single cot bed behind his desk, the **Tin Pin Slammer** turned around and fell onto his bed. Not even bothering to shower, dress in his jammies', or pull the covers over himself.

Hygiene man. Some people just don't give a flying fuck.

* * *

"What up Niggas! I be me, da rappin' killer bee! Here to give the ladies the D, and to give ya da fee!"

And like that, all hell broke loose in the guildhall of the dark guild **Torchwick compendium** , as a black man in white body armor completely demolished the front door of the guild and began to slice into everyone around him with two short swords in hand.

"Ya can't touch me! I'm da motherfuckin' gingerbread man!"

Duck, thrust, retreat, spin, slash, stab, jump, flip, rebound, cross-slash, jump slash, barrel roll. The man in white armor was everywhere. One minute he would be stabbing a blade through one man, the next he would be on the other side of the room, spinning around in the middle of a large group, slicing and dicing three to five men and woman all at once.

"I fly so free, but I'm a killer! You gonna be knocked into a tree, and stung like a bee!" he shouted with a grin, jumping into the air, spinning like a drill, slashing everything in sight with spinning motions.

It was much like a dance, a dance of death. With every step blood was spilt. With every breath, a body fell. And with every rhyme, the fear permuting the air grew more in intensity.

"You got nothin' on me! I'm da man with tha' plan! Here to take down this sham!"

The blades glowed. And with a sardonic grin, Killer Bee threw the two blades behind him. Where they froze in midair…and each one split into four swords each. Glowing white, and ethereal in appearance. Sharp to the point, and magical in nature. This was the legandary wingblade technique of the samurai.

"I'm da rappin', mappin', and da dappin' travelin' Samurai: Kirabi! All you fools are going down under! I'm here to bring down this operation, to make a demonstration to the others of yo kind!"

"How did you find us!?" demanded a voice from the crowd of the wounded. Kirabi then turned to the speaker and stared at him in the eye. "Who told you ya could speak!? Just for that, you never gonna see next week!"

And then his grin became malicious.

"Now let's bring down tha' house."

* * *

"Breath in…breath out. Inhale…exhale."

"Trying to give yourself a pep talk Ultear? Really?"

"Shut it wise ass. This is quite possibly the most important event of my life. The SS-class rank exam is not something to play around at."

"Gildharts Glive played around at his exam. If I remember it correctly, he snoozed through the written portion, drunk himself into a coma for the tourney part, and then blowed the entire competition away when he stopped holding back on his magic power."

A glare made its way onto the beautiful woman's face as she turned to face her companion. "And the only reason he passed is because he has so much raw power that they couldn't turn him down. I may be powerful, but I'm nowhere near his level of power. I have to use finesse, skill, and grace when casting my magic. Otherwise I'm just going to fall like everyone else!"

"And I get that. You need _time_ to cast your magic. I get that, but could you go ahead and sign this here so I can get back home already? I mean, I've been standing here for the past 45 minutes and you haven't moved an inch."

Blinking slowly, Ultear Milkovitch, daughter of the Wizard Saint Ur Milkovitch, looked back towards the Delivery boy standing in front of her, holding a package. An irritated scowl on his face as he stared at the woman in front of him.

Ultear is a pale-skinned woman with dark purple hair and brown eyes. Her hair was currently let free, cascading down her back until it was halfway to her tailbone. She was currently wearing a tight fitting battle outfit. The battle suit is sleeveless and skin-tight, being divided into 3 sections; the main body of the suit and the legs of the suit from the thigh down are both white with black patterning, with the space between them being a deep brown. The entire suit is trimmed with gold patterns, and she sports a matching white headband. On her arms she wears long black sleeves, with the section from her elbow down bearing chunky, gray wrist-guards, from which she can could produce a lacrima that she could use as a weapon.

And standing across from her was Kiba Inuzuka, who was wearing a black hoodie that had a red V imprinted on it that went across the his torso, as well as wearing dark brown shorts that were held up by a belt buckle shaped like a cow skull. Tennis shoes adorned his feet as he stared blandly at the **Time** mage in front of him, holding up a piece of paper for her to sign as he held a brown package underneath his armpit.

"What? You gonna sign this or not? I currently got other deliveries to make. If I don't manage a certain amount then Konishi is going to have my hide. She already hates me for being, in her words, 'an experiment in artificial brutishness'…or something like that. I think she called me stupid, but I can't really tell. She uses a lot of big words when I'm around her."

Blinking again, and then sighing, Ultear grabbed the paper and pen from Kiba's grip, and then signed the paper. Handing it back to the Delivery boy, he exchanged the paper for the package. With a smile and a simple "Pleasure doing Business with you!" from Kiba, she turned around and began to make her way back towards to where she was standing originally.

Five minutes later, a glowing glyph shaped like a clock appeared into existence right next to Ultear's head, and began to ring like an alarm. With a sigh, the **Time** mage snapped her fingers, and banished the alarm clock.

Taking a deep breath, Ultear began to walk out of the hallway that she had stood in…

…and walked out into the middle of Crocus's famous coliseum.

There, in the stands, on the far side across from Ultear, in the judge's box, were three of the wizard saints, as well as an official from the Mages Association. Those four Wizard Saints being Jura the earth mage, Makarov Dreyer of Fairy Tail, and Ultear's mother, Ur Milkovitch.

All of them were staring down at Ultear as she closed her eyes in the vacant coliseum. Up in the judge's box, Ur turned to Makarov and nodded. The old man turned his gaze from his fellow Wizard Saint and tapped the desk he was sitting at with his pointer finger. Suddenly, a sea of runes rised up from the tip-top of the coliseum walls, and encircled the arena in a sphere of estoric, glowing runes.

Tapping the microphone in front of him, the Association official, a sophisticated looking man wearing a suit'n'tie, and a pair of sunglasses, began to address Ultear.

" _Ultear Milkovitch. Today, you have so far taken the written and tourney parts of the SS-class rank exam. And you have, so far in our eyes, performed about average in terms of what we expect. Our standards are not your standards. But you are indeed SS-class material. But now we have one final test for you to take, just as the other examinees have a final test._ "

Ultear said nothing. She only stood still at her spot. Her main weapon, her jade colored steel orb, floating by her side. Ready to be used at a moment's notice.

" _To many mages, simply having one style of magic is good enough for them. For others, multiple branches of magic are what they strive to improve. What we look for is innovation. Taking one style, and using it to do something completely different than what we expect. That is what we ask of you Ultear Milkovitch. We here, today, ask you to demonstrate a spell that is innovative, and powerful. You may use any magic you have at your disposal, but we want to see how you use it. If you do not meet the standards in power or originality, then you will be failed like so many other hopeful applicants. Ready whenever you are. Begin the demonstration._ "

Opening her eyes, Ultear let a smirk grace her lips. "Well then…time to have a little fun."

One step forward, and one arm raised…and then the back leg forward, and the front arm lowered, and the other arm taking its place. Semi-circle spin, and stop at the drop of a heel. Thrust the arm to the left with her back towards the judges. Left arm open palm, summoning forth a magic ethereal clock.

Tick tock, tick tock goes the clock, as the sky is filled with a circle containing the roman numerals for one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, and thirteen. The air pressure drops, the coldness seeps in. the sky turns purple as stormy clouds block the heavens.

The pure raw magic is permuting the air. A smirk graces the lips of Ultear as turning gears replace the pupils in her eyes. The sclera turning a shining golden color. Raising a leg, and extending it, the **Time** mage pirouettes around back to face the judges. Bending low, with the back leg bent, and the front leg extended diagonally downward, she dips her head. With the palms of her hands open, with one raised in the air behind her, and one arm running parallel to her extended leg.

The smirk turns predatory as the golden magic circle in the sky begins to change. Two pointers originate from the center, the point of origin. One is shorter than the other. The longer one begins spinning rapidly, while the other one spins slowly. However, the pointers are going in a counter-clockwise motion.

And then the clock in the sky begins to speed up, faster and faster it goes. And then another magic circle, just like it, appears bellow it. And then another one, also very similar to the original, appears above it. And then another bellow, and then another above.

And then the circles compress into one circle. And then that circle glows brighter than the glowing eyes that layed in her skull. With a smirk, Ultear stands up. She rests one hand on her hip as her hair flows in the wind, generated by the intense magic swirling around the arena.

With a victorious smirk, the **Time** mage pointed one hand towards the side of the arena where no one was sitting. The side that had been purposefully vacated in order to be used as target practice for the spell portion.

Cracks permuted the air as **Time** itself creaked under the might of the spell that had been cast, a testament to the pure raw magic that was being used. Up in the stands, the official stared at the magic circle with something akin to awe. A reverent smile on his lips as he realized what Ultear was trying to accomplish.

"Amazing. She didn't just research a lost magic…she recreated one of the eighteen lost spells…"

Using her other hand, the one not resting on her hip, Ultear pointed towards the empty stands with an open palm. Magic lacing her voice as she called forth the spell just as a terrifying hunk of rock passed through the magic circle.

" _ **Arc of time immortal: Meteor!**_ "

And like that, pure destruction was unleashed upon the coliseum. It was as if it was a glimpse of Ragnarok itself. As the magic saturated rock fell from the heavens, space itself seemed to heave and twist around the heavenly object. Accelerating its descent, and increasing its velocity.

Fire caught around the arena, pure stone was set ablaze as the magic heavenly body fell from the sky. Cracks were left behind of the path that the meteor took as it took its time to reach its destination. And when it actually landed onto its destined place…it was pure hell.

The rock exploded, completely obliterating the stands and even shattering the runic barrier that Makarov had set up, and it even spilled out into the city. Six building were lost as ground Zero was turned into nothing but a lavaland. Earthen shrapnel landing in various places around the coliseum. It was pure destruction.

Pure mayhem.

And absolutely breathtaking.

" _Ultear Milkovitch, we of the Mages Association welcome you into our society with open arms as Fiore's newest SS-class mage. We expect to see you in our Fiore branch Office in one weeks time to receive your badge, and to hear of the benefits that one befitting your station is to receive. Have good day._ "

The **Time** mage could only catch her breath as she stood panting on her knees. And then she heard the announcement from the Association official and froze. Slowly rising up, she took a deep breath before opening her eyes.

And was Immedianlty greeted by the sight of her mother Ur, right in front of her. Flashing her the proud smile that only a parent could give to their own child. And like that, Ultear glomped her mother.

* * *

 **Omake number Uno: The origin of the Tin Pin Slammer's title.**

"Hey Shika."

"What is it Naruto?"

"What's the guy with the basketball doing?"

Squinting his eyes, the Nara looked up from his newspaper that he was reading out on the 'porch' of the 36 coffee shop. Across the street there were a bunch of kids playing a makeshift game of Basketball. With team of two playing against a team of four.

Leaning back into his seat, Shikamaru took a sip of his coffee and went back to drinking his coffee. "Seems to me like it's a bunch of kids that don't know how to play fair. I mean, the score is probably 9-0 considering the fact that those two kids are playing against four people. Ya know what I mean?"

"Actually the score's 15-6 Shika."

"That's still pretty much a huge advantage. Those kids are gonna lose if this keeps up."

"Yeah…"

"What? You gonna do something? You think you got the balls to walk into that court, and rebound the game into a whole 'nother direction?"

"You forget Shikamaru Nara…unlike a lot of other people…I'm a true B-baller."

And like that, Naruto surged forth from the patio of the 36 coffee shop, and speeded towards the court. Using his handy **Ex-quip** magic, he changed his outfit from a simple jacket and pants, to a jersey with a fox head logo, and bright orange sweatpants.

Diving into the battlefield, Naruto swooped by an unsuspecting fouler, and snatched the ball from the boy's grasp, and began to dribble it down the court. Weaving in and out, and dodging around all the kids playing, he shuffled down the court, ball bouncing off of the ground and into his hand, and back again like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Suddenly, when he was far away from the hoop, Naruto jumped into the air, and towards the hoop to dunk the ball into the goal.

"COME ON AND SLAM! AND WELCOME TO THE JAM!"

And then he slam dunked the ball into the hoop. The ball, rebounding off of the court, slammed a crater into the ground. Like a true B-baller, Naruto landed outside the crater, dribbling the ball with one hand, the other, in a 'come at me' gesture. And then, he shouted out his challenge to the two opposing teams.

"COME ON AND SLAM! IF, YA WANNA JAM!"

And like that, the two opposing teams looked to each other. And an understanding passed between the two former adversaries. And like that, the surged forward, and tried to slamdunk NBAruto. To which, he only responded, "PARTY PEOPLE IN THE HOUSE, LET'S GO!"

And like that, a slam jam of epic proportions played out in Crocus that day. And the champion, would forever be remembered as…the **Tin Pin Slammer**.

* * *

 **0-0-Omake: Party hard: part 2: Extra-dimentional mishaps-0-0**

Salto de salir del portal , la tripulación CAT tomó en la vista de la zona . que era un postre , sin vida y bleek . y thenv vieron los sombreros mexicanos .

"Shit!" gritó Naruto. "Everybody back in the portal! WE'RE IN MEXICO LAND!"

y luego lo hicieron. justo a tiempo para evitar la inquisición española inesperado.

"That was a close one…" said Sasuke as he wiped the sweat off his brow. "Any second later and we would have been caught up in the most stereotypical mexican celebration posible…"

"The maracas…the maracas!"

"Shit!" yelled out Shikamaru, "Kiba's experiencing PTSD!"

2 HOURS LATER

"There there kiba…it's okay. The fiesta isn't happening or anything." Said Naruto as he calmed down Kiba, who was wrocking back and forth in the fetal position.

"Hey," called out Sasuke, "At least it's not as bad as the battle of the three Marache bands."

"GAAHHHHHH!"

"Way to go Sasuke…way to go." Drawled out Shikamaru.

 **Meanwhile: back with the other guys**

"She is just too damn adorable." Quipped Mister Uzu as he walked into the Uzumaki Manor floating in subspace.

Behind him was an adorable little fox girl with nine tails and red hair, whisker marks, and adorably huge eyes that just made you want to hug the ever loving shit out of the kit. She was wearing a cute little dress full of frills and other girlyness stuff. Behind her was a Buxom, busty, and epically attractive fox looking lady, who also had nine fox tails of her own…as well huge freaking tracks of land. Two of them. She was growing huge melons.

She had boobs. That jiggled…and stuff.

"And that's Mister Uzu checked of the list sweetie. How many are we expecting again dear?"

"A hundred and fifty momma!" replied the adorable little fox girl with all the motherfucking kawai and other adorable bullshit that existed in the known universe.

And then a handsome, blond man with a scars all over his body and a huge sword strapped to his back appeared out of thin air. He was wearing a red coat and was in the company of a pretty blond lady with spiky hair, and another Kushina look-alike.

"And that's another guest here at the family gathering!" spoke the fox woman with cheer.

* * *

 **FUCKING FINALLY, HAPPY SUMMER MOTHERFUCKERS! ARE YOU ENJOYING YOUR SUMMER? BECAUSE I'M NOT ASSHOLES!**

 **For one, I'm being kicked out of my house because the other is a fucking prick and sold it to a rich couple that have no goddamn idea what they are even doing. Been helping with the packing on that end. I wasn't able to go to A-kon this year, meaning that a solid two year streak is broken, and I had to get a new 3ds because my old one got totaled. Thanks for that mister box!**

 **So yeah, how's your life been? It's not so bad, I got my friends and family, and a house basicly already chosen. Summer classes are fun, and things are going alright.**

 **MY computer is in the shop, and I have no idea when I will be getting it back. That's why this took so long to get out. It's been in there for the past month or so, so here's the deal. This story, as well as my other ones are going to take fucking forever to get out. So don't expect much from until around Christmas time. That's when things will probably improve.**

 **Also, Killer bee is here! I have no idea why I decided to put him in this chapter when he wasn't scheduled to make an appearance until two chapters later, but oh well.**

 **Review and tell me your thoughts an other shit!**

 **AND THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE!**

 **BABABABWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!**


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